It's Hard To Refuse You
by MRSTJ1
Summary: A BenFelicity chapter fic. The war is on and Felicity and Ben are slowly discovering their feelings for each other extend beyond friendship, but can those feelings grow as Felicity does, battered by the events of the war?
1. Chapter 1

It's Hard To Refuse You

Chapter One

It was a cold day at the end of December, 1775 and Benjamin Davidson was hurrying to wash and change his clothes, so that he would be in time for dinner at the Merriman's good table. It would not do to appear disheveled. Martha Merriman had been like a mother to him since he had come to stay, and being accepted into the Merriman family as he had made him determined to be as helpful as possible. They treated him more like a son than a servant and he was happy working as an apprentice for Mr. Merriman. He would have been happier in the Continental Army, but since Mr. Merriman was gone so much, working for the Commissary, also an important part of the war effort, Ben had become resigned to continuing to run the Merriman's store in Williamsburg, at least for a time. It would have no been right to desert Mr. Merriman when he had so much else to do. At least Mr. Fitchett had decided to join the Commissary as well, and was helping Mr. Merriman with that work, leaving Marcus to help Ben at the store.

That meant that stout and gossipy Mrs. Fitchett was now using the store as a clearing house for the latest news of the war, which made it the second most popular place in town to get news, after Christiana Cambell's tavern, but Ben could live with that.

Ben heard voices downstairs, and recognized them. He knew those voices well, and knew what was going on. Young Felicity Merriman was visiting the horses in the stable below his quarters, as she so often did, and this time she was accompanied by her younger sister, Nan.

"So Annabelle is not going to marry Lord Lacey?" Nan asked, in a curious voice.

"No," Felicity answered. "The engagement was broken by mutual consent, which is lucky for old Bananabelle. Otherwise she would have been put down as a bolter and her prospects would have been ruined. Mrs. Deare will be disappointed not to get the chance to be midwife to a Lord and Lady. She may be a patriot, but it still would have been a feather in her cap. Lord Harry has decided however, that he does not want to wed Annabelle anymore than she wishes to wed him, at least not at this time."

"I suppose now that she will go back to following Ben about," Nan sighed.

At the sound of his name, Ben started. He was not a total fool. He had known for some time that Annabelle Cole was sweet on him, but while he thought her a rather pretty girl, he did not think their temperaments would suit at all. She was too flighty and snobbish. He still had to finish his apprenticeship and establish himself in business, and he had been avoiding Annabelle whenever possible. Besides, he did not think war time was a good time to be thinking of marriage. He was certainly old enough to begin consider courting, and many of his friends had already begun, but he no intention of considering Annabelle Cole at all.

"She already has," Felicity said gloomily. "Elizabeth and I have done all we can to disabuse her of the notion, but she is very stubborn."

So that was what that whole episode about bright eyes and teeth had been about! Ben smothered a laugh. Leave it to two merry little tricksters like Felicity and Elizabeth to try to take the wind out of Miss Cole's sails.

His laugh died quickly though, when Nan said, "Why don't YOU marry Ben, Felicity? Then we could keep him in our family always. You get along with him so well, and I do not want him to ever leave us. I was very angry with him the time he tried to run away. I even thought I hated him for all of the trouble he caused, but now I know better. He has become a steady young man. It would make perfect sense to me if you were to marry him. You are the one who always believed in him, after all."

Felicity giggled. "I do not want to see him leave us, either. Not ever. I would miss him terribly, for he is one of my dearest friends. I am still but twelve years old and Ben is seventeen. He would never want to marry such a silly little girl."

"I do not think Ben considers you silly…at least not anymore. He has said many admiring things about your spirit, how you help take care of Polly, and how you keep house. You kept the whole house going last year when mother was ill. Mother says you are growing like a weed. It will not be that long until you put your hair up and your skirts down and start receiving beaus. And Ben is very handsome, hardworking and kind."

"He is most handsome and most kind, but I am still too young to think about such things," said Felicity firmly. "Now that Patriot and Penny and Bess have had their dinner, let us go clean up for ours."

The girls left the stable, and Ben was left in thought. Felicity was still a child, but she had matured beyond her years due to the war and her mother's terrible illness. She was bright and cheerful and an excellent housekeeper, due to her mother's wonderful example and training. He had one quick thought of being a real part of the Merriman family forever in the new republic that he was sure was to come, but he shook it off quickly. He was not in a position to think of such things, and Felicity was indeed too young to consider them. It would be an insult to the Merriman's to harbor such thoughts about their child.

In August, 1776, as Ben put away stock, his mind was on the war. He was wild with longing to go, but now also glad in a small way he was not at liberty to go. He had perfect faith in General Washington, who was organizing the Continental Army. The general had wisely realized that his troops were desperately short of powder. There had been not only raids on arsenals, and some manufacturing attempts planned, but it now looked like France was going to be willing to sell powder to the Colonists. Ben wanted to be a soldier, but he had decided he might be better to be a soldier in an army that at least had adequate powder and shot. But many a time he longed to escape the confines of the store. If he had even been able to spend more time out of doors, it would have helped Ben liked the out of doors. He had missed visiting the plantation that summer, and thought often about how green a place it was, how the fish must be biting in the river, and how the horses and sheep must look out in the pastures.

Felicity was sweeping the floor, and Ben glanced over at her. She was whistling cheerfully as she worked, and it made him grin. She was always trying to be helpful, even when it took great effort to do so.

"You're doing a good job, Felicity," he said to her. "Your father will be proud of you once again when he returns. It must be hard to have to do so much work here at the store, but you do it well and never complain."

"You and Marcus never complain, either." She looked at him with warm brown eyes.

"That is because it is our job. You could be home helping your mother, or sewing yourself a new dress, or taking care of those horses you love so instead of being cursed with such boring, dreary tasks.

"Work well done is relieved of its curse," Felicity answered. "Nan is better at helping mother anyway, and while I do enjoy a pretty dress now and then, I do not live for fashion. I like being here at the store. I love the way it smells. I have since I was a little girl. I love the smell of soap, spices, coffee beans and apples, all mixed together. There is no where else I would rather be than here helping out. It's hard to refuse you when you need me."

Remembering the day she had called him most handsome and kind, he wondered if that was just because of the store or because of him as well, but he quickly chided himself for his arrogance. But Felicity had turned thirteen and was becoming a woman before his eyes, and inexperienced as he was in the ways of women, Ben could tell she would be a handsome one herself. It was so unexpected for him to be seeing Felicity in this way that it made him uneasy. The apothecary's son, a short, pudgy lad named Jeffrey Galt, already fancied her, and came to the store often to buy sweets and catch her eye. Ben recognized this, because it was exactly what he now knew Annabelle Cole had often done when she had been sweet on him, and it gave him an odd feeling of dread that he could not explain. He told himself that Felicity had been left at the store in his care, and it was up to him to make sure no harm befell her, but it still niggled at him that a fourteen year old boy was hanging about, getting in the way, just to be in the girl's presence. Ben was about to turn eighteen, and had no patience with the clumsy youth.

Ben had already decided he would remain with the Merriman's for awhile after his eighteenth birthday. Edward Merriman had promised him a half-share, which was more than generous, to stay on while he continued to follow the army with food and supplies. It was a situation that suited both the young man and the older one well.

In October, 1776, a letter arrived from Yorktown.

"Oh, Ben! A letter from your family! How happy you must be!" Felicity said as he stood in the store fingering the envelope in his hands. "I hope it is good news. So much of the news lately has been bad."

Felicity's father had been traveling, collecting food for the Patriot troops, and the last time he had come home, he had been very discouraged. The news from New York had all been bad. General Howe had taken control of Manhattan, and the Continental Army had had to withdraw to Harlem Heights in September. A great battle was said to be coming. The heaviest of the fighting was expected to be at White Plains, and it was feared the Patriot troops might have to retreat again. Felicity was certain, though, that they would eventually win the day. But she feared for her father's health and safety, and was very grateful that Ben had agreed to stay at the store with the Merriman's servant, Marcus, and keep it running while her father worked for the Commissary.

Felicity knew how much Ben had wanted to join the militia, but he was as loyal to the Merriman family as he was to the Patriot cause, and had agreed knowing not only how much he was needed at the store, but how much help Mr. Merriman was giving the cause. Felicity felt Ben deserved some good news from home.

When he read the letter, though, Ben's brown eyes grew hard, and he tossed it down on the counter impatiently.

"What's wrong?" Felicity said tentatively, laying a hand on Ben's arm as he stared moodily at the bit of paper.

"My mother is sorry that I ever came to Williamsburg. She regrets my father apprenticing me to your father."

"My father has the finest shop in Williamsburg," said Felicity hotly, "and you were the finest apprentice in all of the colonies, and are now the finest shopkeeper I know aside from my father himself!"

Ben sighed. "Felicity, it has nothing to do with the shop. You must understand. Williamsburg is different than Yorktown. There are many more Loyalists there. My mother and my brothers prefer British rule. They are not fervent Loyalists, because they are trying to stay out of trouble, but they do not understand the Patriots."

"How many brothers do you have?" asked Felicity, fascinated. Ben hardly ever talked about his family.

"I have three. We are all three years apart, just like you and your siblings are. Brandon is the eldest, then Brett, then Bryce, and I am the youngest."

"All of your names begin with the same letter," noted Felicity.

"Aye, that's a tradition in my family. Whatever letter you begin with, you continue. It was the same with my great-grandfather's family, and my grandfather's and all of their sons." He smiled slightly at Felicity. "It must sound like a foolish notion to one who is not familiar with it."

"On the contrary, I think it's sweet," Felicity answered. "There's nothing wrong with tradition, when it's sentimental. It's just when it's rooted in stubbornness that it vexes me."

"That's the problem I have with my mother. Since my father died, she and my brothers have refused to even consider changing anything in their lives. No wonder they have Loyalist leanings. All of their friends are Loyalists, and they would never consider listening to anyone who had the slightest difference in opinion from theirs." Ben waved his hand at the letter. "My grandfather had a tobacco farm, and our family later made our living running one of the mercantile houses that handled tobacco sales. Being well-off made my mother even more traditional. She and my brothers would ignore the entire war if they could. My mother is even suggesting I consider marriage to the daughter of her best friend, as if the first thing on my mind at such a time as this should be finding a wife."

Felicity was thunderstruck at the thought of Ben's mother trying to negotiate a marriage for him with the daughter of a Loyalist family. "Do you know your intended? Do you like her?"

"Aye, of course I like her. I've known Louisa since we were sharing the same rattles and teething sticks. But she is not my intended by any means. I've never even considered marrying her. I have enough trouble with the Loyalists in my life without adding in the additional worry of a wife. Women bedevil me, Felicity. I don't think I'll ever understand them. I'm going to put the whole notion out of my mind. The storeroom needs straightening, and Marcus will not be able to help me. He had deliveries on the other side of town."

"I will help you, Ben, but will you tell me one more thing?"

"What do you wish to know?"

"Do I bedevil you?"

Ben laughed. "No. You are as honest and straightforward as the rest of your family. You remind me of your grandfather. Even when he and I didn't agree, we could come straight to the point always, and eventually respect each other's views." He and Felicity both took a moment to remember the old gentleman. Then Felicity shook her head to clear it.

"We'd best get to that storeroom. Marcus knocked over a barrel of nails on his way out. He wanted to clean then up, but I told him the deliveries were more important. That was the right thing to say, was it not?"

"Aye, that's my good girl," Ben said, smiling at her, and Felicity felt a flicker of happiness hearing the words that she had so often heard from her father. Ben was not going to leave them and go back to Yorktown to marry a girl named Louisa. He belonged in Williamsburg, with the Merrimans, the people he understood best, and who understood him best.

At dinner that night, as Ben took his place at table, Felicity's mother gently stroked his cheek. "Ben, my boy, you look tired. Did you have a difficult day at the shop?"

"I wish we could do better, I fear I'll never be as good as Mr. Merriman. And so many are in fear of British attack that they are only shopping for the things they must buy. Many items we purchased in better times have sat on the shelves since the war began."

"That is not your fault, Ben. I know you are doing the best you can and I thank God every day that we have you in our lives."

Felicity smiled at her mother's kind words, as Ben blushed. Mrs. Merriman had considered Ben to be part of the family since he had come from Yorktown, a shy and serious fourteen year old boy. She would never try to talk any child of hers into marrying a girl he did not want to marry.

Felicity had a strange longing to go back to the shop and spend more time with him, but the winter sewing had just been started, and her mother and Nan needed her help now. There were warm cloaks, coats, gowns with lined skirts, and petticoats to be made. Each day for a month Felicity got up at seven, had coffee with her breakfast, and joined her mother and sister to measure, cut, baste, fit and stitch. She took special care, though, with the new coat that they were making for Ben.

When it was finished and presented to him, Mrs. Merriman told him that Felicity had done most of the work on it.

He smiled at her and said, "Then I will treasure it all the more." Felicity was warmed herself by his words.

By January, 1777, Felicity was frantic. They had not heard from her father since before Christmas, which was most unusual. He came home every few weeks as a rule, and he would never have missed Christmas at home unless his circumstances had been dire.

Ben had tried to help make Christmas merry, by complimenting the decorations Felicity and Nan had put up in the house, and by getting them all talking of the happier times of Christmases past. He and Felicity especially enjoyed reminiscing about the time he had escorted Felicity to the Yule Ball at the Governor's mansion, the height of the season in Williamsburg.

But Felicity, in bed that night, felt a sense of dread return. She had heard of the horrible prison ships maintained by the British in New York, and was fearful that her father had somehow been caught in some kind of battle. More soldiers were dying for lack of care than were being killed in battle. She prayed for her father to come home soon, or at least send word as to why he had been delayed so long. When word finally came, she wept with happiness as the whole family, including Ben, sat in the parlor, listening to her mother read each word in a gentle voice.

My dear Ones,

I never expected to be gone at Christmas time. I hope you managed to have a happy Christmas. The need of the soldiers has been much greater than we expected, and we kept getting involved in other situations that we had not prepared for.

The militia had to withdraw across the Delaware in early December, into Pennsylvania. Many men were killed or captured, but the British failed in several attempts to crush our army. We hear that Congress may have to abandon Philadelphia. That will be a hard blow, but we believe resistance to the British occupation is growing.

Many of our brave men are cold and hungry, and many men walk barefoot in the snow, leaving spots of blood with every step, but as long as they live, they will keep up the fight, and I will continue to do all that I can to help in any way I can.

I know my dear wife, that you are doing all you can to keep our home running smoothly in my absence. Polly is probably growing right before your eyes. I can't wait to see her again. Tell William I expect him to be the man of the house and mother's right arm, just as dear little Nan must be her extra hand. I hope my little Felicity is minding her manners, keeping her temper, and doing all she can to help Ben and Marcus as she promised me she would do. She is in my heart every moment of every day. I have no doubt that Ben is doing all he can to keep the business going. Give him all my best wishes. He may not have been born into our family, but he is no less a son of my heart.

Pray for me, and think of me. Knowing you are all together warms my heart.

Please give Mrs. Fitchett the enclosed letter from her husband, so that she knows at least that we are still together, and helping each other as good comrades do.

Your loving husband and father,

Edward

"Oh, what a splendid letter" cried Felicity. "Whatever do you think he means by situations he had not prepared for?"

"Probably something he did not wish to write," said Ben softly, "in case the letter fell into the hands of the Loyalists."

"Father said more about you than about me," said William crossly to Ben.

Ben smiled and ruffled the child's hair. "I need more lecturing than you do. Your mother is so wise that helping her must be a joy always. The store, alas, is sometimes a trial."

Nan sidled up to Ben. "I'm glad father mentioned you. T'was only fitting. You do so much to help in so many ways. And I quite understand why he thinks of you as one of us. You're my almost brother in my mind as well. I wish you could really be my brother."

Ben had been touched by Mr. Merriman's faith in him, and he was equally touched when Nan said this, and reached out to pat her shoulder. He remembered overhearing her say something quite similar in the stables the previous year. But looking at her carefully, he could see she was not the same girl.

Nan had been a robust toddler, but as she had grown, she had not kept that vitality as her sister had. She had come down with every childhood illness possible. At ten Nan was thin and quiet and delicate. She had become a little house mouse. Seeing this, Ben tried to be especially gentle with her. Mrs. Merriman was not surprised by Nan's devotion to Ben Davidson, but she was surprised to see her eldest daughter blushing. Felicity tried her best never to blush. It didn't suit her complexion. As she looked from her daughter to her husband's former apprentice, a new thought came into Mrs. Merriman's mind, but she pushed it aside. Felicity was still a child. Time and their own hearts would have to determine where Benjamin Davidson's final place would be in the Merriman family.

In March, 1777, Felicity and Ben were arguing on the front porch, where they were enjoying an unusually bright spring day, in between bouts of spring cleaning. Nan had taken William and Polly to play in the yard to get them out of the way, while Rose and her mother and Felicity worked. William was raising rabbits, and because rabbits were not hard to raise the whole project was getting out of hand and taking up quite a bit of time and space. Mrs. Merriman, Felicity and Rose were cleaning the carpets. Ben had left Marcus at the store, feeling the need for some of the fresh, crisp spring air, and had come to help Rose lift the carpets, and take them outside so they could be beaten on the line. He was waiting to help her to finish so they could bring them back in. Felicity and her mother were taking turns helping Rose. It was hard work.

"I can't believe that the British are still counting on Loyalist support, but that is what we hear," said Felicity. "Loyalist exiles are giving those they left behind too much credit, I think."

"According to what your father said when he was home, there are two main British armies now, Carleton's in Canada and Howe's in New York. Campaigns, he had heard, have been planned in London, by Lord Germain, but I suspect they have not been planned well. The rivalry between the two commanders works in our favor. I do not think they will work in conjunction," said Ben, rocking comfortably in his chair, as the sun shone on them.

"Why did he not tell us such things?" Felicity asked crossly.

"Probably he did not tell you because troop movements are considered a suitable topic for men, not children."

"Benjamin Davidson, I'll be fourteen in a few weeks. I'm not a child any more."

"That is why I am not averse to telling you the truth. We have no secrets from each other, do we, Felicity? It's hard to refuse you when you want to know something," said Ben, thinking as he looked at her, that she had spoken the truth. She had grown into a lovely young woman right before his eyes, and occasionally it still disconcerted him.

Felicity relaxed. "No, I do not think we do. Remember when I was trying to learn to ride Penny and borrowed your best breeches? Thank you again for not telling on me."

"Thank you, again, for helping me when I ran away to join the militia."

"I was so angry with you, Ben Davidson. That was a very foolish thing to do. I'm glad you came to your senses so quickly."

"I promised I would never run away again, and I have not. Didn't I tell you then that it is hard to refuse you?"

"Not, not, not," sang Polly as she plopped down on the bottom step and began to tunefully bang a wooden spoon on the porch.

Felicity picked her up, and Ben smiled at the pretty picture the two Merriman girls made as the bright red head bent over the lighter one. "You are good with little ones, Felicity Merriman. It seems like just yesterday when Polly was born, and you were helping your mother care for her."

"She was such a sweet baby. I wish her birth had not cost Mother the chance to have other children. I would have enjoyed having more babies in the house. Soon it will be warm enough for her to play outside all the time," said Felicity giving him a smile back. "Perhaps we will be able to visit grandfather's plantation. We'll pick blackberries and peaches and figs. The fields will be green, and the flowers will be blooming, and the horses will be in the paddocks. When she's old enough, I hope father will buy her a pony so I can teach her to ride."

"No one would be better suited to do so," said Ben, thinking about how nice a visit to the plantation would be, for all of them, and how unlikely, alas, that it was. He ignored, as was proper, the fact that Felicity had broached the subject of childbearing with him. Women were not supposed to discuss such things with men, but Felicity had always been bluntly honest, and he was used to that.

"It is kind of you to help with all of this heavy lifting, Ben," Mrs. Merriman said, coming around to the front of the porch. "Spring cleaning is a chore, but it is worth it, in the end. The reward is sure. I want to take the mattresses out tomorrow, to air, if the weather holds. I was hoping you would help us with that, too, if it's not too much trouble."

"Your home is always comfortable, peaceful and attractive, Mrs. Merriman," said Ben, "and I would be delighted to help you. I am honored to be of service to you in any way I can. It would most ungrateful of me not to be, since you have taken me into your home with such kindness and grace. Indeed, I have felt more at home here than in the home of my childhood."

"Felicity and Nan have been a great help, too of course. I feel every mother who has her daughter's best interest at heart will not neglect to teach her first of all the duties of a household. When the girls have their own homes, I want them to be accomplished housekeepers. Compared to all other accomplishments, it is the one that bears most on a woman's relationship with her real life and her family."

"I wonder where I will live when I have my own home," Felicity mused. "I sometimes feel as if I never want to leave you and father, but then I feel a longing for the future, and wonder what it may hold for me."

Ben looked at Felicity, and said seriously, "We will live in a nation of our own, a glorious Republic, in peace and happiness. I feel it in my bones."

"Such serious talk," Mrs. Merriman teased.

"Oh, by the way, Felicity," Ben said, to do a bit of his own teasing, "before I left the store, young Jeff Galt came in. I can't imagine what he was looking for, because the moment he came in and looked around, he looked quite disappointed. He bought quite a bit of candy, but I would guess what he was more interested in was not in the store today."

Felicity rolled her eyes. "I suppose not. Never fear, though. He'll be back. He is very hard to get rid of." She set Polly down, ignoring the child's quivering lip, and went back to helping Rose.

Mrs. Merriman looked at Ben. "I take it that young Mr. Jeffrey Galt has taken an interest in my oldest daughter?"

"It would seem so, but Felicity does not seem interested in return. She brushes him off as quickly as she can."

"I think," said Mrs. Merriman, "that she needs a bit more time to realize where that future of hers lies."

"Don't we all?" Ben answered. He held out his arms, coaxing Polly to toddle toward him. She saw more of Ben Davidson these days than she did her father, and had no fear of him. When she had first begun to reach out to him, to be picked up, Ben had been terrified. He was the youngest in his family and knew little about babies. When he had first come to the Merriman's, William had been a toddler, but at the time, Ben had not spent as much time with the family. Homesick, he had kept to his room, until Mrs. Merriman had coaxed him into her family circle. Now he was so at home in it, he had no qualms about sitting Polly on his knee and cuddling her.

As the toddler crowed with laugher from her higher perch, tossing her strawberry blond hair, Mrs. Merriman shook her head smiling. "You may not know where your future will lead you, young Benjamin, but if given half the chance, I think you will make an excellent father."

"That, I fear, is far off into the future indeed, but I hope you are right. I do not think a man is truly a man unless he has a family," Ben answered, ducking as Polly waved her spoon, nearly turning his head into her next drum.

Felicity had one great sorrow that summer. The Merrimans were staying in town, but her horse, Patriot, was going out to the plantation. There was a likely looking mare at her grandfather's old place, and Saul, the slave who still managed the horses on the plantation thought they could get some excellent foals if they bred her to Felicity's stallion. Felicity was excited about the possibility of having a new foal in the family, but she would miss Patriot. As Ben had feared all along, she and her family were too busy now to spend the entire summer on the plantation as they used to do. When Saul came to take Patriot away, she ran into the garden and cried.

Ben went after her, walking toward her slowly, not wanting to intrude, but sensing that she needed him. He dropped down beside her. They were both on their knees, surrounded by the combined scents of roses, mint, sage and thyme. He put his hand out, and she did not pull away. She leaned into his hand, and he lifted the other hand to her hair, which had come tumbling down. It was as bright as a marigold. Ben ran his fingers through it, and then moved his hand down to rub her back. Their knees touched and she rested her tear-streaked cheek on his shoulder, accepting the comfort he offered.

After a long moment, Felicity pulled back and looked straight into his eyes. Her cheeks were still wet, and he used his thumbs to wipe away the tears. He suddenly wanted so much to kiss her that he felt faint, but he knew how wrong that would be.

"Patriot will love being back at the plantation, just as you do," he said soothingly, "and when the new foal comes, it will be a blessing."

"I know," said Felicity, burying her face into his shirtfront, "But so many things have changed. Nothing seems to stay the same."

"I will always be your friend," Ben said gently.

"That's true," said Felicity. "At least I hope it is!" She treated him to a trembling smile, and he smiled back. His eyes were a warm, dark brown, and Felicity realized at that moment exactly how much she loved to look into them with her own chestnut colored eyes.

In October, 1777, Mr. Merriman had just come home after a long and weary trip. The war was not going well and he was glad to be home again. Howe had just defeated Washington at Brandywine and Germantown, in Pennsylvania and occupied Philadelphia. He arrived right after apple butter time, and at last had the chance to really see how much his children had changed over the course of the war. Polly was a real little person now, with thoughts and opinions of her own. William was becoming a thoughtful boy, kind to animals and devoted to his sisters. Nan was still frail, and her delicacy filled him with dread, for not many families in town managed to raise all of their children to adulthood.

"It makes me ill that the Congress has once again abandoned Philadelphia, and that it is in Howe's hands, but we were outmaneuvered, and had to retreat. The Germantown attack was also unsuccessful, so now we watch and wait," said Ben, as they discussed the progress of the war after dinner one night."

"I fear the coming winter," said Mr. Merriman. "Disease and exposure take more good men than musket balls. And I fear I will miss another Christmas at our table. What a table it always is!"

"Oh, my dear, do not tell me you will be leaving us for so long yet again," said Mrs. Merriman. "I worry about you so when you are away. I worry about what you are being exposed to, and whether you have enough to eat. And to have you away at Christmas is almost more than I can bear."

"But Martha, the boys in the camps are missed too," Mr. Merriman said to his wife. "They do their duty and do it manfully. I must do mine. I must do what I can to help them. When I have less to eat than I do at home, I just think back in my mind remembering the sugared fruit, and your delicious tarts, and the good chocolate you pour so elegantly from our silver pot."

"It seems as if the war will go on forever," said Felicity with a sigh.

"The invasion of Canada was a disaster," said Ben.

"It delayed a full scale British counteroffensive," said Mr. Merriman, "but I fear it cost us what little support we had in British public opinion."

"They must be laughing at us," said Felicity bitterly, "after we had to abandon our own capital!"

"Philadelphia will be in our hands again, soon, Felicity," Ben tenderly assured her. "Of that I have no doubt. We have General Lafayette on our side now, and Baron Von Steuben is going to be helping to train the troops. They are both brilliant men."

"If you say so, I will believe you," Felicity said, smiling demurely at Ben.

Mr. Merriman watched his daughter's sparkling eyes, and then glanced over at his wife, who shrugged. Later on, after Ben had gone back to his room above the stables, and the children were in bed, he said to his wife in the privacy of their own bedchamber, "What is going on between Felicity and Ben?"

"Nothing I am sure," said his wife. "They like to talk, but they always have. They have been friends since they were children."

"They are not children any more. Lissie is fast leaving childhood, and Ben is a man. Do I need to ask him what his intentions are toward my daughter?"

"They like each other, but they are both too passionate about the war to be passionate about each other. At least I hope not, for from passionate children other children can come. That is not to say that Ben would not make a good father- on the contrary, I think he would."

Ignoring her husband's gasp of shock she continued. "I love Ben like my own child. I would not be against him truly becoming part of the family some day, but I do not want to see Lissie bind herself before she is eighteen. It has nothing to do with the lad himself. He is honest and hardworking and kind, and I'm sure he would treat her well. She is just too young."

"I had never seriously considered Ben for Lissie, but now that I do, it makes sense. Many young men are being lost every day. I see them, maimed, and dying, and dead. It makes me happy to know that Ben is safe at home. War is not the glorious thing he thinks it is. It is a terrible thing. We must think about who will be left when the war is done for our daughters to marry. It would grieve me to see the girls left spinsters, living without love, and never having any children of their own. Mrs. Deere is looking forward, I think, to bringing another generation of Williamsburg babes into the world, and I would like some of them to be our grandchildren."

"Miss Manderly is a spinster and she is an accomplished woman," His wife pointed out. "That's what of the fine things about this new nation of ours. There is opportunity for all. And I still think it's too early to start worrying about who the girls will marry. Even Lissie is too young, although she does seem to have somewhat of an attraction to Ben, and Jeffrey Galt, the apothecary's son seems to be quite sweet on her."

"I never liked that lad. His father spared the rod and spoiled the child, I fear. But I'm not surprised that Lissie is being noticed by the lads, as young as she is. The oldest Cole girl started courting when she was sixteen, and she was not nearly as sweet and pretty as our Lissie," Mr. Merriman pointed out.

"Yes, and it was a disaster."

"We started courting at sixteen!"

"Well, you and I were made for each other. There was no reason to wait. And there was no war then. Lissie and Ben are too much alike, both impulsive and proud. They are not ready to marry," said Mrs. Merriman firmly.

"I don't think either of them has given it much thought yet. There is something there, but I do not know yet what it is."

"I will watch them carefully, my love. And when this cruel war is over, we will be able to judge them better. In the meantime, I think Lissie should get out of the store more, and spend more time doing other things. Ever if it's wartime, people don't think as well as they should of a girl in trade."

"Now who is worrying about opportunities for women?" her husband teased her.

Over the winter of 1777, General Washington encamped with his army at Valley Forge. Out of ten thousand men, 2,500 died of disease and exposure. Baron Von Steuben's modern Prussian methods of organization and tactics, though, stood them in good stead when they came out in the spring.

General Clinton had replaced General Howe as British commander-in-chief. The entry of the French into the war had forced a change in British strategy. New York City was now vulnerable to French naval power. Clinton had to retreat from Philadelphia to reinforce New York.

In the spring of 1778, Felicity got word that Patriot's foal had been born on the plantation, out of Naomi, the last mare he grandfather had bought before his death, and she longed to be there, but she wanted to spend as much time with Elizabeth as possible. The Cole girls and their mother were going to New York to be with Mr. Cole. They had missed him too much, and their property in Williamsburg had been too hard to maintain without him. But Felicity would miss Elizabeth sorely, for she was the closest friend that Felicity had in Williamsburg, except for Ben, and there were things that Felicity just couldn't tell Ben that she could tell another girl. Nan was getting ready to start at Miss Manderly's, and Felicity hoped that she would also make friends there, as she had.

In the summer of 1778 Felicity was delighted to hear that the city of Philadelphia out of British hands and that General Clark had captured British posts in the Northwest. It almost made up for the fact that Elizabeth had gone. Nan was making the most beautiful samplers with Miss Manderly. Felicity was in awe of her sister's beautiful stitching and surprised by how much Nan enjoyed making samplers. Felicity could sew, and sew well enough when she had to, but it was not her favorite pastime. She had just finished making Ben a very serviceable shirt, but with Nan sewing was an art. Felicity always paid more attention to news of the war than she did to her sewing basket.

When Felicity heard the news about Philadelphia, she ran into the back room of the store and hurled her arms around Ben in her excitement. "General Clinton has abandoned Philadelphia! Someone else in the family will have to be the saint. You are now the prophet!"

He hugged her, laughing with joy. She looked up at him, and reached out, her fingers outlining his smiling lips, and when she did, he could only stare into her eyes, struck dumb by her gentle touch. They both suddenly found it very hard to breathe, and Felicity wanted nothing more than to press her lips to his. It would have been but the work of a moment, but she could not do it. It would have been too forward, even for her. She stepped back, suddenly oddly shy.

He let her go, and looked at her again, his expression unreadable. "That is great news," he said slowly. "The tide of the war is surely changing. Perhaps now your father can come home and let me go so I can be there at the end."

Felicity stepped back further in shock. "Oh, Ben, how can you say that? I couldn't bear to see you go now. I've lost Elizabeth, and my father, and I don't want to lose you as well."

"Felicity, it's all I've ever wanted. I'm nineteen years old. I've given your father a year past the time I promised him. I've cut myself off from my entire family to do so. When will it be my time?"

"I thought WE were your family, Benjamin Davidson! We need you here, and I want you to stay."

Ben looked miserably at Felicity. "Don't make this harder than it has to be, Felicity. You know how hard it is for me to refuse you, but this is something I feel I must do. I've wanted it for so long."

Before she could reply, William came running into the shop looking as white as a ghost.

"It's Father!" he said crying.

Ben and Felicity went running, Felicity holding up her skirts as she had done in childhood, to the horror of old Mrs. Templeton, who happened to be standing outside the store. When they got to the Merriman house, they found Mr. Fitchett and Marcus lifting Mr. Merriman out of the wagon.

"He's been ill for four days," Mr. Fitchett said grimly. "I never thought he'd make it home. Looks like pleurisy."

Pale, but composed, Mrs. Merriman said firmly, "Take him into the bedroom, Marcus. Ben, please help. Lissie, fetch warm water and clean sheets. Nan, tell Rose to start making some beef tea, and wine whey. William, do not look at me like that. Go and feed your rabbits. Take Polly into the garden and play with them until I get your father settled."

Mr. Merriman was so light and wasted that Ben thought he probably could have carried him alone. He gently placed him where Mrs. Merriman directed, then left the room. Mr. was still outside by the wagon.

"That's it," said Mr. Fitchett. "I'm done for awhile. I've seen things that would make a body's hair curl in this war. Thomas Paine was right when he called these the times that try men's souls."

"Mr. Merriman will be all right, won't he?" Ben pleaded.

Fitchett shook his head. "Good nursing may pull him through, and I knew he'd get the best nursing at home, but it'll be a rare thing if he makes it." He shrugged. "I'm going home now. I haven't seen my wife in weeks."

Mr. Merriman was very ill, much more ill than his wife let on to their younger children. As Felicity was hurrying home from the store one day, she noticed the apothecary's carriage outside her house. Had her father taken a turn for the worse, or had Mr. Galt just found some new medicine for him?

She ran the last few steps, only to be startled by Jeffrey, who was waiting on the porch.

"You frightened the wits out of me," she said furiously. "I did not expect you or your father to be here today."

"My father is not here. I took the carriage and came here because I needed to speak to you and I did not feel like walking. I'm sorry I startled you, Miss Merriman, but I wanted to speak to you before you went in. My father and I have been discussing it, and we think it would be a good idea if your family and mine come to an arrangement soon."

"Concerning what?"

"Why, you and I, Miss Merriman. Surely you must know how I feel about you. My feelings are hardly impetuous. Has it really escaped your notice that for some months past, the friendship I have held in my heart for you has deepened into something more? I am asking you to marry me."

"Mr. Galt! I am not unaware of the honor you have bestowed upon me by asking me to become your wife, but this is hardly the time to discuss such things, with my father so ill, and the war dragging on."

"My father and I think it is the perfect time. Your father is going to pass on soon, and we all know it. Your mother would be much better off with one less child under her roof to support in her widowhood. You will need protection, and I can give it to you."

There was a terrible squeak from the other side of the porch, and Felicity turned in shock to see William standing there, looking horrorstruck

"Father is going to die? Mother won't be able to take care of us?"

She pulled him to her side and hugged him hard. "Don't believe it, William! No one knows that, and certainly not this ill-bred oaf!" She turned to face Jeff. "The answer is no. I would not even consider marrying anyone so insensitive! You are no gentleman to come here at a time like this and say such things to me!"

"You are no lady, to show such a temper. Suit yourself, Felicity Merriman. You can stay a spinster piddling around in your paltry shop for all I care."

"I think we can end this now," said a cold voice from behind them all. Three heads swiveled to see Ben Davidson's furious face looking up at them from the bottom of the steps.

Jeff glared back at him. "Stay out of this, Davidson. 'Tis no concern of yours."

"It is my concern when the shop you are insulting is half mine. It is my concern when the child you are terrifying and the lady you are abusing both reside in my heart and have been left in my care. Leave here at once, and do not come back. If I ever see you around the store or near this house again, you'll regret it mightily."

"I'll go for now, but I'll be back," Jeff warned.

Ben didn't give him a second look, but instead knelt at William's side and took the boy by the shoulders. "Your sister is right, William. No one knows when your father's time will come. It could be soon, or it could be years from now. He IS very ill. There is no denying that. We hope he will get well and live a long time. But no matter when it is that whenever anyone you love leaves you for good, they watch over you from above, and you will always have people to love you and care for you. And someday you will see again the loved ones you have lost, and you can join them in watching over the ones who have been left behind."

"Is Grandfather watching me?" The boy asked, as he nestled in Ben's arms.

"He certainly is, and he is very proud of you for being a good boy and taking such good care of what is yours." Ben stood up, and patted William on the shoulder. "Don't worry about what might be. Run along now, and I'll be there in a few moments to help you build another hutch for your rabbits."

William nodded. Relieved and distracted at once, he ran around the side of the house. Ben turned to Felicity. Her hat had fallen off, and he was shocked to see her weeping. He gathered her up next, brushing the tears tenderly off her cheeks.

"How much of that did you hear?" she asked him, after a moment.

"Nearly all of it, I think. That was a very delicate refusal, my dear Miss Merriman. Much better than the blackguard deserved."

"I never wanted him to think I was encouraging him, but every time I turned around, he was there looking at me. It made me so uneasy."

"I did not know that. I knew he fancied you, but I did not know it was frightening you. What I was not able to see, you could have told me."

"It was my problem, Ben." She stepped back and wiped her eyes and gave him a tremulous smile. "You were wonderful with William. If father goes, it will break my heart, but I will have to go on for the sake of the little ones."

"I expect no less of you, Felicity, but we must hope for the best. We'll manage. You will manage. Did I not tell you when you were but ten years old that you were either the bravest or most foolish girl I had ever known? I soon learned that you were indeed the bravest. You must go on being brave."

She pushed back her flaming red hair. A few tendrils had fallen out of place, and begun to curl around her face. "Ben, you said we should always be honest with each other."

"I am being honest with you, Felicity. Your father is very ill, but I still have hope for him."

"I don't mean about my father. Ben, am I truly in your heart?" Felicity leaned close, and Ben could see the remains of her tears glittering on her cinnamon colored eyelashes, her flushed cheeks, and her wayward curls inches from his face.

He looked pained. "You have been in my heart since you were ten years old, sneaking out of the stables in a borrowed pair of breeches. When I feared Mr. Nye meant you harm my heart nearly stopped. You were in my heart when I left you a desperate message with a whistle at your grandfather's plantation. You were in my heart when I lay injured in the woods, and felt more lost and alone than I have ever felt. My heart aches for you with every loss you suffer. You will always be in my heart."

"I'm so glad Ben, for I love you, and I always will." With that she leaned in, and this time Ben could not help himself. He had but to dip his head the slightest measure to press his lips to hers. Neither was even aware of when they had put their arms around each other, but once the embrace began, they were aware of everything.

Felicity felt the muscles in Ben's back beneath her hands, and his coat buttons pressing into her breast. She could hear the sound of his breathing and his heart beating so close to her own. They were finally kissing, kissing again, and again, and again. Then his lips parted slightly, and she opened hers instinctively to meet him. He tasted like coffee and milk. He smelled like linen and soap, horses and leather, scents that reminded her of her father, and therefore would forever draw her to other men.

Ben could smell Felicity's hair, which was clean and soft like the summer breeze. Her kisses were passionate and her body pliable in his arms, and he was fascinated by the softness of it. As he drew her closer, he felt her breasts against his chest, and her thighs press in along his. She gasped, and sighed, as they kept kissing, but neither sound was a regretful sound. He held her close with one arm, and ran his other hand slowly down her shoulder, to her back, rubbing gently, and then found himself just as gently tracing the curve of her buttock. She moaned slightly then, and that sound shook him. He turned his face away from hers, burying it in her hair so she could not see the mixture of desire and shame in his eyes.

"Felicity, no, we must not do this!" He caught his breath and let her go so suddenly, that she nearly stumbled. "I beg your pardon, Felicity. I do not deserve it, but I beg it of you anyway. This is my fault! It will never happen again. I'll go away if I have to, before I ever again take such unfair advantage of you, and outrage the hospitality of this house that has sheltered me for so long!" He turned his back to her, and leaned over the porch railing in despair.

"Ben, you must not feel that way! Nothing has ever felt so right to me. It was what I wanted. How can you be taking advantage of me, if this makes me so happy? I'm not a child. I'm a woman, who does not mind the touch of the man she loves."

"Lissie, you were right when you told Jeffrey you would not marry him. Your reasoning was sound. We're in a war, and no one knows what is going to happen next. Your family needs you now. Your mother needs you."

"They need you, too, and I need you!"

"Not this way. I just realized it. I'm treating you like that oaf would have treated you if he had gotten the chance. Nothing is different just because it is me and not him!"

"Everything is different, Benjamin Davidson! It's different because I love you, and you love me. I know you do. I felt it every time I am in your arms."

He finally raised his head and looked at her sadly. "You think that you love me, but I fear you are too young to know your own mind. I think you've perhaps made me into what you want me to be."

"You have made yourself into what I want you to be…an honest, caring, hardworking man that I can be proud of. That is what I love about you! Ben, are you trying to tell me that you don't love me?"

"I think I do, but it's not a decision I want to make impulsively. When the war is over, if we still feel the same way, I will speak to your parents in a proper way, and then we will decide. But I am not going to take you on the ground like an animal!"

Felicity winced at his ugly description of what she had considered a very beautiful thing. "That's not what you were doing," Felicity said in a small voice.

He gave her an odd smile. "Ah, Felicity, you know so little of men. Again, my dear, I must ask your forgiveness for my assault on your innocence. Now I need to get back to William. Pounding a few pegs will do me good. Go to your father. Your mother will be wondering where you are."

Felicity watched him walk away, and her heart filled with despair. With one kiss, she had felt she understood the whole world. That same kiss had made Ben feel that he understood nothing. It was so unfair.


	2. Chapter 2

It's Hard To Refuse You

Chapter Two

Mr. Merriman was very ill for most of August, and Felicity spent most her time helping her mother take care of him, while Nan took care of the house. She fanned her father and sponged him off. She fed him broth. When her mother was occasionally overcome with exhaustion from nursing her husband and fell into bed, Felicity watched over him. The whole family longed for the cool breezes of the plantation, but Edward Merriman would never have survived the trip, over the rough roads they would be required to drive along. They had sent the servants who went to the plantation every summer without them. Rose was especially sad to miss the chance to see her family, who lived on the plantation year round, but she knew Mrs. Merriman needed her help.

Felicity was glad her sister was able to run the household, but missed talking to her. She was too busy to wonder how Nan was feeling about things, and longed for more hours in the day, but her father came first.

Felicity was glad to have something to do, to keep her mind off Ben. He was avoiding her, but to be fair, she was also avoiding him as much as possible. Things had become awkward between them. It was clear that they could never be friends again as they had been as children, but neither of them knew what their new relationship would finally be.

Ben missed Felicity at the store, though. Mrs. Fitchett came in one day, after she had done the rest of her marketing, to inquire after Mr. Merriman's health, and when Ben told her he was no better, but no worse, she looked troubled.

"Mr. Fitchett is talking about going back out for the Commissary," she said, "but I do not want him to go alone. If Mr. Merriman were well enough to go along, I would not worry so much."

The war was not going well, and Ben knew the woman's fears were well–founded.

She brightened, though, when she remembered something else. "Did Miss Felicity tell you about the letter she got from the Coles?"

Ben paused, pained. "We have not spoken much of late. She is busy helping Mrs. Merriman with the house and with her father's care and I have been busy here at the store."

"Well!" said the stout woman, "I thought for sure she would have told you. You and Lord Harry were such good friends…for all that he was a Loyalist! He was wounded, you see, fighting with General Burgoyne at Fort Ticonderoga. He pulled through, but his soldiering days were through. He decided to go back home. And he resumed his courtship of Miss Annabelle Cole! They are to be married in a few weeks, so that she can return to England with him! I heard it from Mrs. Deare, who got a letter herself from Mrs. Cole. They were quite good friends, you know. But I know that Miss Elizabeth wrote Miss Felicity about it. She picked up her letter at the Post Office about the same time Mrs. Deare did."

"I didn't know," Ben exclaimed. "I wish Miss Cole and Lord Harry ever possible happiness. They are probably better off out of New York. I expect Lord Harry's sister will be pleased to have him home, even if she is not pleased to have a Colonial sister-in-law."

"Perhaps Felicity did not mention it because the subject of marriage is so painful for her right now. You heard she rejected Jeffrey Galt's suit, did you not? Perhaps she regrets it. It would have been a good match for her," Mrs. Fitchett said, as she looked at some fabrics.

"As I heard it, Miss Merriman did not feel that she and Mr. Galt suited each other at all, and that it was improper of him to bring up such a topic at such a time. The war makes things so uncertain, and her father is so ill," said Ben coldly, as he stood beside her, straightening out some sewing notions.

"All the more reason to find herself a husband," said Mrs. Fitchett, dropping the bolt of fabric and gathering up her shopping basket. "There aren't that many suitable young men left in Williamsburg."

The key word, Ben mused, twirling a quill in his hand, as he watched the woman leave, is suitable. He wanted to ease the strain that existed between him and Felicity, but Mr. Merriman was still too ill to discuss the matter, and he did not feel right burdening Mrs. Merriman with his feelings of inadequacy. Then he got an idea, and made a decision to go see Mr. Fitchett as soon as possible.

He thought about Felicity, and how she would respond to the idea he had in his head. Would the Merrimans really think that their former apprentice was good enough for their daughter anyway? Would he ever be able to have a business of his own? What would happen to Mr. Merriman and to the store if the war continued on indefinitely? Ben wondered how he would he be able to afford a home of his own with business so poor. Marcus had become worried that if times did not get better, that Mr. Merriman would change his mind about keeping the slave families intact, but Ben assured him that his wife, who helped Ruth with the garden, and his sons, Ethan and Luke, who helped with the horses and other household chores, were not going to be sold. The lack of trade at the store worried Ben, too, however, and he felt very guilty about having gotten so physically intimate with an innocent impressionable girl that he had no official understanding with, as much as he had enjoyed the intimacy itself.

Felicity had also gone to Market Square that morning, running errands for her mother. As she passed the post office, she thought about the letter she had gotten from Elizabeth. According to Elizabeth, Annabelle was much relieved. She was now at the age where she was afraid of being a spinster, and found Lord Harry much more appealing now than she had at the age of sixteen. Annabelle was sick of war and ready to go back to England. The initial excitement of living in the colonies had long passed for her.

Felicity walked into the house feeling as if she would never be happy again. As she hung up her cloak, she heard her mother calling to her.

"Lissie? Lissie? Is that you? Come here, my dear!"

Felicity hurried up the stairs, and found her mother standing in the doorway to the sickroom where her father had spent so many days in a fever. Martha Merriman was crying, but she was smiling, too.

"Look, my darling," she said, as she led Felicity to Edward Merriman. For days he had lain twisting in bed, his pale skin hot and dry. Now it was flushed and he seemed peaceful. "The fever has broken. He is sleeping naturally."

"Oh, Mother, I am so happy!" Felicity hugged her mother hard. "He is going to start getting well now?"

"It will take a long time for him to recover," said her mother, "but I think he will."

By the middle of autumn it was clear that Mr. Merriman was on the mend, Felicity took over most of his care. Her mother started to take charge of the house and the other children more, and was able to get more rest herself while Felicity stayed with her father. He slept a great deal, but gradually started regaining some strength, and when he was awake, he liked to listen to her read, or sing, or just have her sit beside him and hold his hand. When he slept, she closed his bed curtains, to keep out the drafts. She kept the pitcher full of fresh water. Occasionally she looked out the window as her father slept and watched William and Polly playing in the yard. William had become quite fond of playing marbles, and the youngest Merriman children both liked rolling hoops. Felicity would stop for a moment and try to remember what it was like to play childish games, but then her father would waken and she would turn back to his care. When Nan came in, she was often forced to hush her and send her out, since her father needed his rest, and that was hard, but Felicity knew they would have time later to talk.

The only time Felicity made sure not to be in her father's bedchamber was after dinner, when Ben came up to discuss the store's accounts and progress with him, and discuss the news of the war. He kept Mr. Merriman entertained most evenings. The area west of the Appalachian Mountains and north of the Ohio River was the scene of some of the bitterest fighting so far. George Rogers Clark was leading an expedition of Virginia troops against the British and their Indian allies. Ben and Mr. Merriman both thought Clark a great frontier leader.

She stayed in her father's bedchamber, helping him eat his meal while the rest of the family had supper, and then when Ben was about to come upstairs, she would creep down to the kitchen and get herself something to eat. She made sure she saw him as little as possible, and that they were never alone together.

She and her mother were both attending to Mr. Merriman one day, when her mother spoke to her gently. "Lissie, you have been a wonderful nurse, but Father is better now, and I think you are spending too much time in the house. I have gotten caught up with my other work now. Would you not like to go back to the store, at least part of each day? I'm sure you miss being out with people."

Felicity's heart froze. "I'm fine, really."

Her father smiled at her. He was able to sit up now. He liked reading the papers and books, but was getting restless and soon hoped be able to leave his bed for short periods of time. "Your mother is right, Felicity. As much as I enjoy your company, it would not be fair of me to keep you here day and night. I'm sure Ben and Marcus could use your help. Ben says nothing of you, but I'm sure he misses you there."

"No, he does not! I cannot go back. I cannot face him again." Both of her parents looked at her, startled.

"Felicity, what do you mean? Has Ben done something to upset you? I noticed you were not speaking, but I thought you were just too busy worrying about your father and about me," said her mother.

"He has nothing else to say to me. He doesn't want to be near me anymore. He thinks it is his fault, but it is mine, and mine alone." And with that Felicity buried her head in her arms on the edge of her father's bed and began to cry.

"What happened? What did he do and what did you do? I want to know." Edward Merriman said, and his voice had all of the sternness of days past.

"It was that dreadful Jeffrey Galt. One day when I came home, he was waiting for me on the porch. He…he told me that he and his father had decided it would be a good thing if he were to come to court me."

"Why, what did you say?" Mrs. Merriman asked, wide-eyed.

"I told him no. I tried to be as kind as I could, but he became angry. He told me that father was going to die, and that you'd be better off if I were out of the house so you didn't have the burden of caring for me."

"He said that to you? But what has this to do with Ben?" Mr. Merriman asked, confused.

"William heard what Jeff said and got very upset. Ben heard Jeff, too, and sent him off with a flea in his ear. Ben was so angry, but so splendid, father. I wish you could have seen him! Then Ben talked to William until William calmed down and felt better. Ben was so kind and gentle with William. I was so grateful. After he sent William away, he turned to me, and took me in his arms. He meant no harm. I was so confused, so angry and disappointed, and humiliated, that it felt wonderful to have someone holding me, someone that I trusted and believed cared for me."

"Lissie," said her mother slowly, "I do not want you to get the idea that it's fitting to make a habit of standing on the porch in men's arms, but there was nothing wrong in Ben trying to comfort you. You were distraught, and I agree it is certain that Ben meant no harm. He is a gentleman, and I can see why he might feel he took a liberty, but I do not see it that way, and I'm sure your father does not, either."

"Certainly not," said Mr. Merriman, but before he could go further, Felicity shook her head fiercely, tears flying off her face.

"It wasn't just that. I…kissed him. I kissed him, and he kissed me, and I didn't feel angry or humiliated any more. I felt safe, and happy, and I never wanted to stop. It was so exciting! I knew then why I didn't want to marry Jeff. He's an impossible oaf, but he could have been wonderful, and I still would not have wanted to marry him, because he would never be as wonderful as Ben. Mother, when I kissed him, I knew. I love Ben. And I told him so."

"And Ben does not feel the same way about you?" Mrs. Merriman asked gently.

"He says he does, but if he did, I can't imagine why he'd get so upset about me saying that I feel that way. Ben says that while he's old enough to know his own mind, I am not, but I think I am. He says he doesn't want to take advantage of me, or insult you, but I swear, he wasn't doing anything I did not wish him to do, and I know how much you like Ben. I thought you would be happy for us. I thought you would understand."

Felicity stood up and began to pace like a caged animal. "Ben even said he didn't want to be like Jeff, but he couldn't be, ever. He's not that ill-bred. He says there's too much going on in our lives right now to be sure that it's right. But no matter what Ben says, however kindly, I still think I made a fool of myself, over a man who didn't want me. And that is why I cannot face him!"

"Felicity, listen to me," said her father. "Can you not see how honorable Ben is being? He wishes only your happiness. You were very, very emotional, and when you are emotional, you do not always keep your wits about you. You know that. We all know that. If Ben wants to make sure that you know your own mind that is a very kind thing to do. It takes a stout heart to keep clear-headed around you when you are set on something. He is a gentleman and finds you very hard to refuse in most things. If you love him, and he loves you, it will sort itself out."

"What if he leaves us before that can happen? He still speaks of it sometimes. What if he goes away and never comes back?"

"Felicity," said her mother, taking her daughter into her arms, and brushed the last dampness off her cheeks, "If you love him, and he must leave you, and does not come back, it was not meant to be. If it is meant to be, it will be."

Martha Merriman gave her daughter a last hug, then said, "At least go sit in the garden for awhile. The fresh air will cool your temper and do you good. If you are still restless, you can check the burlap Ethan and Luke put over the vegetables. If we don't keep it on, the rabbits will be eating the last of them before I get a chance to finish putting them up for the winter."

'Yes, Mother," Felicity answered sadly.

When she had left the room, her parents looked at each other and shook their heads.

"Well, this is a fine mess," said Mrs. Merriman. "Poor Lissie!"

"Poor Ben," Mr. Merriman retorted. "Lissie must have blasted him like lightning. You know how determined she can be when she thinks she knows what she wants. At least he kept his head."

"What can we do about this?' Mrs. Merriman said, worried.

"I will speak to Ben." Mr. Merriman said firmly.

"Get some rest first. This excitement is not good for you. I'll bring you some fresh water," said his wife, and she left her husband to his own thoughts. He had actually found the excitement rather invigorating, and he trusted both his daughter's feelings and Ben's ability to do what was right.

When Ben came up to visit Mr. Merriman after dinner, Edward had planned out what he wanted to say. He waited until Ben had complained about the lack of trade at the store, which was due to the problems with money in the colonies. Congress had issued paper money, which the citizens had nicknamed "continentals" but the states had also issued paper money of their own, and most of it was worthless. It took forty paper dollars to buy one gold dollar. Ben was also upset about the rumors that the capital of the colony of Virginia might at some point have to be moved away from Williamsburg due to its vulnerability to attack by the British.

"We shall lose our prominence," Ben fumed.

"Perhaps if it happens, it will only be temporary," Mr. Merriman suggested. "The college will certainly continue to flourish." He considered Ben carefully. "You now consider Williamsburg your home, do you not?"

"This is the best home I have ever had," Ben said firmly.

"But it is a troubled home," Mr. Merriman said, plucking at the edge of his coverlet. "I know about Jeffrey Galt. I know what he said to Felicity and how it upset her and William. I know how you came to the defense of my daughter and son."

Ben looked at Mr. Merriman warily, clenching his fists and sliding forward until he was sitting on the edge of his chair. "I wanted to kill that fool. I'm glad I did not, however. It is a more fitting revenge for him to know he was wrong. I thank God every day for your recovery, Mr. Merriman. You have always treated me more than fairly, indeed like a son, and I will never forget it."

"My daughter has the notion that you might make a fair son-in-law," said Mr. Merriman, slyly watching Ben's face.

Ben's face twisted in pain. "I wish I could be sure she meant that, but she is very young, and I want to earn a comfortable home for her, instead of always imposing upon you. Everything I have, you have given me. Is it fair to also ask you to give me your daughter as well? There are many in Williamsburg who would find me a poor match for Felicity, not just Jeff Galt."

"You have never imposed on me. You have earned your place in our lives. You are a truly excellent young man and I can not refuse to listen to you simply because of how you came into our lives. If Lissie loves you, my wife and I are perfectly willing to have you go on learning to love her, and to help you go on working to find a place in this world for the both of you."

"I would feel better if I could continue to work for her. I want her, but I want to make sure I can make her happy, and I also want a chance to stand on my own two feet. There were so many things I thought I wanted. I wanted to be a soldier. I wanted to be a fighter, at least for the things I believed in. I wanted to be a hero."

"Lissie does not want a hero. She wants you, for what you are. But if you feel you have more to accomplish before you are ready to marry, I can understand that. It will all sort itself out in time."

"I hope so," Ben said earnestly. "But I still want to pursue my dream of doing something for my country. Mr. Fitchett is ready to go back out to assist the troops, but Mrs. Fitchett does not want him to go alone." Ben swallowed hard. "I was talking to him and I think I should be the one to go with him, now that you cannot."

Mr. Merriman plucked at his covers again. "Are you sure this is what you want? I don't regret for a moment what I did, but I saw many disturbing things. It can be very dangerous at times. Do you really know what you are getting into?"

"Aye, I've been giving it a lot of thought. You would need another apprentice, but you can use my share of the store's profits to pay for one while I am away. My mother has a friend in Yorktown, who is looking for a place for her youngest son. He is about to turn fifteen, and she is afraid he will get swept up in Patriot talk and run away and join the militia if she does not find something else to bind him. My mother's friend has Loyalist leanings, but her son does not. You do not have to worry about that."

"If you think he is suitable, I will not worry about it. Nearly every family I know has been torn by this war. Benjamin Franklin himself has a son, named William, who is a Loyalist, you know. What is this lad's name?"

"Charles Prentis, Sir. May I write to him in your name?"

"Yes, if you promise to speak to Felicity first about your plans. You need to be honest with each other."

"Yes, sir, I will," Ben promised, and Edward believed him. He was a good lad, a really decent young fellow.

The next morning, while Nan was helping to churn the butter, Felicity offered to go to the smokehouse for Rose, who was quite busy. She felt it was time that she got back to helping with household chores. Nan had shouldered an unfair amount of that burden for a long time. Besides, Felicity loved the smokehouse. She loved the smell of the good smoked meat, and the sense of security it gave her to know there was plenty of food ready for her family, that they would never know hunger.

She was startled though, by Jeffrey Galt, who appeared in her path quite suddenly. He swept his hat off his head, and bowed low before her.

"Miss Merriman, forgive me, but I really must speak with you."

"I have nothing further to say to you, .Mr. Galt," said Felicity, wishing that the very earth could swallow her up and take her away.

"If you do not speak, at least you can hear," Jeff said passionately, his pale eyes flashing. "I deeply regret what I said to you previously. A great miracle has occurred here, and it was born of your faith. It must have been. I know I behaved badly, but I deeply regret the hurt I caused you. Please accept my apology. Can we not forget about the past and move forward? I still care for you, and I would give anything for a chance to show it."

"It's no use, Jeff. I wish you no ill will. I'm sure many girls in this town would be happy to have you come courting, but I cannot accept you. I wish you well, but it's not use calling on me. I will never change my mind."

"Won't you even tell me why?"

"There's nothing to tell. I just know in my heart we are not suited to one another."

Jeff's face twisted with anger and pain. "You're a heart-hearted girl, Felicity Merriman. I've loved you all my life, even if it was from afar, and you turn me away without a word. I used to watch you and Miss Cole speaking to each other so intimately and dream of the day when I could speak to you the same way. How can you be so cruel?" He spun around and stomped off.

As he walked forcefully away toward the road, Felicity stood rooted to the spot. She thought of all of the girls in town, who considered it fun to have lots of men come calling, and who enjoyed having their parents presented with lots of proposals. Felicity couldn't understand how anyone could find it amusing to turn down men, even if it was the right thing to do. Felicity thought it was awful.

She stood still, thinking, until Ben appeared, coming down the path from the house. "Was that Jeffrey Galt I just saw turn the corner of the house?" he asked, distracted. "I thought I told him to stay away from you!"

"Let him go," Felicity said, tiredly. "Forget about him. I think that business is finally done."

"We still have unfinished business between us, however," said Ben gently. "May I speak to you, and speak freely?"

Felicity had so much going through her mind that she thought her head would burst if she were forced to add anything else. Irritated, she answered, "You have not spoken to me for days, Benjamin Davidson! Jeff has left me unsettled in my mind. I need to bring in the meat, and it looks like it might storm. Can this not wait?" Felicity asked impatiently.

"I have not much time, and I would be easier in my mind if I had the matter settled. I am going to the post office today, to mail I letter I have written, with your father's permission, to a lad I know in Yorktown. With luck, he will come to us soon, and will take his place as your father's new apprentice."

Felicity was shocked. "A new apprentice? But business is not good enough for Father to hire another apprentice! There is barely enough work for you and Marcus to do! Marcus told me!"

Ben looked at her, determined to explain as clearly as possible. "Once the new lad comes, and understands his duties, I will be joining Mr. Fitchett. I am going out for the Commissary in your father's place. It is all arranged. This is something I need to do. I cannot let others labor for my freedom and my future, and not lend a hand. Fate has decreed I do not join the militia, as I so wished to do, but I will still serve my country and work for her freedom in my own way, and thus I be able to be content."

"Oh, Ben!" A look of total despair crossed Felicity's face, and it caused Ben pain, but also gave him a bit of hope. "I do not want you to go. I do not want to lose you. I told you that I loved you," she blurted impulsively, "and God help me, in spite of everything I love you still."

"Felicity, come." Ben took her by the hand, and led her to the edge of the garden. His fingers were warm entwined around hers. They sat on a bench, and were surrounded with the scent of roses rising up behind them, and sage, thyme and mint floating on the air before them. Felicity listened hard; afraid of what he might say, yet longing for what he might say.

"I love you, too. I'm sure of it now. I will think of you every day until I can be beside you again."

"Then why do you have to go at all? What makes you risk your life and our happiness now, when things are so dark and dangerous?" She was confused, and her head was whirling. How could two different men happen to confess their ardor for her in less than an hour? And why did the one she wanted most to stay have to be the one determined to go away?

"It is honor," Ben said, "that compels me. Felicity, try to understand. I cannot make it any clearer."

"I am trying," said Felicity, "but it is not easy for me to let go of something I want, and in spite of everything, I want you here."

"And it is hard for me to refuse you in anything, but I have always been a patriot, and that has never changed. I wish to serve my country. I need to serve my country," Ben said and sighed. He looked around searchingly, then reached out and pulled off the head of one of Martha Merriman's vivid pink roses and pressed it into her hand.

"Look at this rose, Felicity," Ben said gently, cupping his hand around hers, and leaning his head in until his forehead touched her bright hair. "Life and love are both very precious, especially in full bloom, the way this rose is, but God willing, they always return in the proper season. When I come back, I am sure we will find ourselves in our proper season. And that is why, before I go, there is something I want you to know. If God grants me life, I will be back someday. And I want to come back to you. I want to come back for you. If I come back, will you marry me?"

"When you come back I will marry you," Felicity said, tears stinging her eyes, "I will wait for you, and I will marry you, and if you do not return, I will never love anyone else."

"That is not what I need you to say," said Ben with a groan. "I only want your happiness."

"I'll only be happy when I am your wife."

She tilted her chin up, and found his lips on hers again, but this kiss was not hot and hard, the way their kisses on the porch had been. This kiss was soft, and warm, and the warmth of it went all the way through her. Felicity wanted it to go on forever. They kept kissing, over and over, many of these remarkably gentle and sweet kisses, until the sound of a startled gasp caused them to break apart.

Rose, wondering where her breakfast ham had gotten to, had finally come out after Felicity, and found her in Ben's arms.

"Rose," cried Felicity happily, "Congratulate us! We've come to an understanding!"

Rose looked from Felicity, to Ben, and then back to Felicity. She shook her head, her arms akimbo. "I'd be happy to congratulate you, Miss Felicity, but I think I'll save my prayers for Master Benjamin."

And they were all laughing as they headed back to the house. One person was not, however. Jeff Galt, who had come back looking for the hat he had dropped in his rage, had seen Felicity kissing Ben. He had turned away, finally understanding why she would not tell him the reason for her refusal. He had a rival, and he was not happy about it. He left vowing revenge.

Authors note: The name Prentis comes from the Prentis store in Colonial Williamsburg now. I am grateful for all of the reviews I have gotten. I confess I am more interested in correctly presenting the history of the time period than I am of how I present the characters, but I have found the characters a great way to play with the historic timeline, and I am grateful for that..


	3. Chapter 3

It's Hard To Refuse You

Chapter Three

Ben and Felicity had a merry breakfast with the family. Mr. Merriman was well enough to join them downstairs, sit in an armchair and eat with them, which made the admission of their feelings for each other an even bigger celebration. Mrs. Merriman kissed and hugged them both, which made Ben feel a bit bashful, especially when she said, "You are really my son, now."

Nan was over the moon, chattering more happily than she had in many a day. Felicity was sorry she had spent so little time with her sister over the last few months, when she saw her sister sharing her joy. William hardly knew that Ben was not really his brother, so close he was to the young man, so he had very little to think about concerning the changes a marriage to his sister might make in their friendship. Polly seemed even more unconcerned. To her, Ben had always been a part of the family, and the fact that he would be marrying her sister did not change anything for her. She was too little to understand.

"Your mother and I had talked about what we would do if Ben followed through with his proposal, and you accepted his suit," said Mr. Merriman. "We have decided that it would be more logical for us to move to the plantation with the younger children. It needs more care than we can give it from Williamsburg, and it would be a safer place for the little ones until the war is over. Things are so uncertain here in Williamsburg. After you marry, we are considering moving there permanently. We would like you to think about accepting our share in the store, and this house, as Lissie's dowry."

Ben and Felicity looked at each other, stunned. "How can I refuse?" Ben said. "Mr. Merriman, that is so generous, I do not know what to say."

"You need not say anything. You are the one who has kept the store going these past few years, and you deserve a chance to keep it running. We are giving you nothing you have not earned. I know business is poor right now, but at least you will have a home of your own, and that may make things easier for you as you start out together."

"But I can still visit the plantation, can I not?" Felicity asked. "I love it so much, and I know Ben does, too, don't you, Ben?"

"It's a magic place," Ben agreed.

"Yes, of course you can still visit," said her mother, "and we will visit you as often as we can, but the plantation will become William's legacy. He will be a man someday, and will inherit it, and hopefully carry on our name."

"What about me?" Nan asked, a bit crossly. "You always think of Felicity first. She was grandfather's favorite, and you would always rather have her help you than let me do anything. I'm happy for her and for Ben, but when will it be my turn to come first?"

"We will worry about you when you are ready for a dowry," her father said smiling, "but I hope that will not be for quite some time." He turned back to Ben. "I suggest we wait to announce the engagement until after you have your new apprentice and have him trained, and make the trip you promised to make with Mr. Fitchett. Then you will be free to take over the store full-time and marry. However, when you do, Marcus will come to the plantation with me. I need him there. His family will come as well. As you know, I do not believe in separating the families of my slaves, and his boys are used to the plantation. They have come out there with us to help out every summer since they were small."

"That is more than fair," said Ben. "When the war is first over, it will probably take awhile for things to get back to normal. I will be hard pressed to make a living for myself and the apprentice. I have great hope for the store, but things may be difficult for awhile."

"Rose will also come with us. Her family has been at the plantation since grandfather died, and she misses them a great deal, but she has a niece named Ruth that she has been begging us to bring to Williamsburg. If we are able to arrange that, she will also be part of your dowry," said Mr. Merriman.

All of these changes were overwhelming to Felicity, but nothing mattered except marrying Ben. She could hardly wait for him to get his new apprentice, train him, and make his trip with the Commissary. Then he would be content to have served his country, and ready to settle into their new life together.

She walked to the post office with him after breakfast, so he could send the letter to the family of the boy he wanted to hire as his new apprentice, and then she walked arm in arm with him to the store.

"Are you going to regret giving up your share of the plantation to marry me?" Ben asked gently. "You love it so."

"I do love it, but I will still be able to see it. I'm equally happy in town. And I couldn't take the house and store, and still expect a share of the plantation. This is more than fair. I get you, and I get to make a home for you. I can be happy in Williamsburg, as long as we are together. I want to be married in Bruton Parish Church. I want to be a good wife. Just imagine it! I will be able to do my shopping for our family in Market Square. I want you to have to run out for Mrs. Deare, the midwife, as many times as I can manage, and I can take our children to the puppet shows at publick times."

"You are getting ahead of yourself, Lissie. It will be a long time before all of those things can come to pass," Ben said, laughing.

"Not so very long, I hope," she said, looking at him with love, not even noticing the Williamsburg women who were sending curious glances their way as she reached up to stroke his hair, which he had grown out, and hung down his back in a long tail.

"I love your hair, Ben. It's just like a pony's tail."

"Well, if you're going to equate me with a horse, then I know you must love me," he said, laughing again.

"I'm so glad you don't wear a wig! They seem so silly to me."

"I agree with your father. They are pretentious. I have also heard they are uncomfortable. If they are too tight, they give you a headache, and if they are too loose, they spin around on your head. It's a foolish fashion, as far as I'm concerned, and I'd rather be just what I am."

"That's the way I want you, too," said Lissie.

Jeff Gates went down to Wetherburn's Tavern that night. The sting of his rejection still bit at him, and, over a mug of ale, he tried to ease it by convincing the men there he had seen Edward Merriman's former apprentice having his way with his employer's daughter in the Merriman garden that very morning. While the gossip was skillfully told, few believed it. They continued to debate the matter long after Jeff left.

"Young Davidson and Miss Felicity, at that hour of the morning? I doubt if it went that far," said Mr. Parks, the printer. "And everyone knows that Merriman's daughter turned young Galt down. I think he saw the girl doing something with the Davidson boy, but it was most likely not what Galt says it was."

"I've never so much as seen young Davidson take the hand of any of the town's fairest maidens," said the town cobbler. "But I think a match between him and the Merriman girl was Edward Merriman's plan all along. The man has three daughters and they'll all need husbands. He brought in the lad and trained him up as the girl grew. She's old enough now for him to court her, and courting her is what he probably is doing. Jeff is probably just jealous that someone else got what he wanted."

"I agree. Didn't Merriman have the lad escort the girl to a ball when she was but a child?" said old Mr. Deare. "It would not surprise me if there has definitely been something in the works. Red heads have hot blood, after all. My wife always said that girl would need a man to settle her down, and sooner rather than later."

"And Merriman went off to work for the Commissary, leaving Davidson to run the store and look after his family. I wouldn't mind looking at that girl a bit myself. She's got a lot of spirit," said Mr. Vobe, who had sneaked out of his wife's establishment to enjoy the freedom of Wetherburn's.

"As if a young girl like that would look at you twice!" said Mr. Wythe, the stable man, and everyone laughed, and turned their talk to the war.

Christmas of 1778 was a merry one for Ben and Felicity. Charles Prentis was due to arrive in the new year. As they enjoyed their ham and turkey and mince pie, everyone talked about their wishes for 1779.

"An end to the war," Mrs. Merriman said, as she was serving the jelly.

"More business at the store," Ben suggested.

"Good health," said Mr. Merriman. He had improved a great deal, but Nan had gotten a series of colds that had worried both him and his wife.

"I want the material to make a new dress for Felicity's engagement party," Nan said solemnly, "whenever it is."

"Whenever indeed," said Felicity, looking over at her fiancé. "All I want this year is to be able to tell the world that I'm going to be married!"

"Oh, Lissie, not the whole world," Ben teased her. He glanced at the Merrimans. "About the apprentice, Charles is the youngest son of one of my mother's dearest friends. She and her daughter would like to come with him when he comes to Williamsburg. They have never seen the town, and would like to visit for awhile and bring me all the news of home. I was wondering if you would mind them staying here with us in your home. I can certainly get them a room at one of the taverns if it would put you out too much."

"Ben, you cannot ask your mother's friends to stay in a tavern! This is your home, too. Of course they may stay here during their visit," Mrs. Merriman assured him. "I would be honored to have your friends as guests in our home, for as long as they wish to remain in town."

"Is the daughter my age?" asked Nan. "Will she be my friend?"

"Oh, no, she is my age," Ben told Nan. "But I am sure she will be delighted to meet a well-brought up young lady like you."

"I never get to have any fun or any friends," Nan said crossly.

"If she is Ben's age, and not married, she must be an old maid," said William, looking around the table to see which of his favorite foods was left.

"William, that was most unkind," said his mother gently, but firmly. "Many young women are postponing marriage while the war does on. The young men are serving their country, and the women are doing the same."

"Sybill Luddington was even younger than I am, when she made that forty mile ride to call up the militia, after the British attacked Danbury," said Felicity. "And Susannah Bolling crossed the Appomattox to warn our troop of a British attack."

"Mr. Parks told me that Benjamin Franklin's wife runs his print shop while he travels as postmaster of the colonies. He says Deborah Franklin manages all of the accounts, buys the rags for his papermaking, and folds and stitches the pamphlets," said Ben. "Since Felicity already knows how to tend the shop, perhaps I should teach her to manage the accounts."

"Just so you don't give me any extra stitchery to do," said Felicity. "I will never find that task appealing, as necessary as it is."

"I love to stitch!" Nan cried, but no one paid her any mind.

"Mary Katherine Goddard is a printer as well, in Rhode Island. She issued the first printed copy of our Declaration of Independence," said Mr. Merriman, hastily, before Felicity could get any serious ideas about doing the accounts for the shop.

"War makes people do strange things," William said, helping himself to a cake.

That was something they all agreed to.

The town of Williamsburg was depressed over the news that the British had captured Savannah, Georgia, when Charles Prentis arrived with his mother and sister. He was a skinny boy with auburn hair, a shade that was not at all out of place with the Merriman family. It reminded Felicity of her father's hair, before he had gotten ill. Mr. Merriman's hair was turning a bit gray now.

Charles Prentis seemed eager enough to work. His mother was a very prim lady with neat, medium brown hair, not a strand out of place, and his sister was a very tall girl, with exquisite, thick, chestnut hair. They were most grateful to the Merriman's for letting them come along with Charles. They intended to help him settle in, and see a bit of the town while they were there.

"We wanted to see the town before your Governor Henry retired," Mrs. Prentis told the Merrimans over hot chocolate and tea cakes. "There is talk of moving the capital after he is gone, possibly to Richmond. Williamsburg is such a pretty town, with such broad streets and fine buildings and shops. We wanted to see it while it remained prominent."

"The law-makers have considered moving the capital for some time," said Mr. Merriman. "They consider Richmond safer because it is farther from the coast. I guess it depends on who is elected governor to succeed Henry. I think it will be Thomas Jefferson, personally."

"He went to college here, at William and Mary," said Ben. "I would think he would want to support Williamsburg, especially the way the town is growing,"

"Oh, Ben," said Miss Prentis, "you do love this place, do you not? You must give us a full tour."

"I would be happy to, Louisa," said Ben. "The weather is supposed to be fairly good tomorrow. If Marcus can take care of the shop, I will take you and your mother and Charles around. He must learn where everything is. I will need him to make deliveries as part of his duties as an apprentice."

Louisa? That name reminded Felicity of something. She knew she had heard Ben mention someone named Louisa before, but she couldn't remember what it had been about.

"Will you go with us, Mrs. Merriman?" asked Mrs. Prentis.

"I think not," said Mrs. Merriman. "My husband is recovering from a bad case of pleurisy, and while he is nearly back to normal, he is not used to walking long distances yet. And I have much to do here at home. Perhaps my Felicity can go with you."

"Oh, that would be lovely," said Louisa Prentis. "I'm so looking forward to getting to know you, Miss Merriman. Ben has mentioned you in his letters to his mother over the years, and she has read some of them to us. You and Ben share a love of horses, if I remember correctly." She eyed Ben with interest. "But you have not written lately, or so your mother tells us. I suppose you have been extra busy, since Mr. Merriman has been recovering from his illness?"

"Indeed I have," Ben replied.

It was after Miss and Mrs. Prentis and their son had retired, Charles to the rooms over the stables, and the ladies upstairs in one of the Merriman's guest chambers that Felicity had prepared for them that Felicity remembered where she had heard Louisa's name.

Mrs. Prentis looked around approvingly when Felicity had finished helping her up the stairs, as Miss Prentis followed. The room had a simple carpet, with subdued patterns, beige curtains on the windows, and brown muslin spread on the bed with matching brown bed curtains. There was a nice pier table, a small desk, and a fireplace with a clean hearth.

"You have a lovely home," Louisa Prentis remarked.

"Thank you, Miss Prentis," Felicity answered.

"Oh, call me Louisa. We must become friends while I am here. Like I told you downstairs, Ben writes of you regularly. I have often hoped that I would be able to get to know you someday," she said, smiling.

On her way back downstairs, Felicity placed the name. She was sure she was not mistaken, but she was determined to ask Ben anyway. She stopped him in the yard as he was coming back from getting Charles settled, and on his way to make sure Ethan and Luke had brought in enough wood into the kitchen.

"Is that girl the same Louisa your mother said she wanted you to marry?" Felicity demanded.

Ben blinked. "Well, yes, but that was long ago, Lissie, and it has nothing to do with Charles coming to work at the store. I know what it is like to be the youngest son in a large family, and to have to make my own way. I'm sure Charles will settle in quickly, and his mother and sister will be heading back to Yorktown, once they satisfy their curiosity about what he will be doing and where he will be living. They are particularly fond of him, since he was the only boy, and born long after the other children in the family. Charles was always everyone's baby, and he has been longing for an opportunity to prove himself for quite some time."

"Are you going to tell them about us?"

Ben threw up his hands. "How can I do that? Your parents do not want to announce our engagement yet, and we agreed to wait to be married. If I tell them, they will tell my mother and brothers, and my family will expect to be given details of the wedding plans, which we do not have."

He looked at her carefully. "What is really troubling you, Lissie? Can you possibly be jealous of a childhood playmate?" He leaned in and kissed her lightly, smiling. "I don't know whether to be vexed or flattered. Now come, I must speak to your father about Charles' contract. It must be ready to sign in the morning, and your father was still looking it over."

Felicity did not want to like Louisa Prentis, but try as she might, she could not help it. The girl was lovely, gracious, and friendly. She liked everything about Williamsburg, and got along well with all the Merrimans. William was especially taken with her, and kept bringing marbles, tin whistles and other things out of his pockets to show her. He bubbled up with talk when Louisa was around. Felicity thought it must be a childhood crush, and was quite amused by it.

Louisa was also fond of Polly, who also took to the newcomer in the house and loved to sit on her lap, pulling the ribbons on her bonnets and fingering the lace on her gowns. Polly was such a pretty, friendly child that Felicity was not surprised Louisa liked her. Only Nan seemed cool to her. Nan was a solitary child, however, and hard to get to know.

Louisa looked in all of the shops in town during her visit. She bought a pair of shoes in the cobbler's shop for herself and a pair of gloves for her mother at the milliner's. She was very complimentary about the Merriman store. Once Ben began to train Charles there, Felicity wound up spending even more time with Louisa Prentis and her mother.

They had Loyalist leanings, Mrs. Prentis more so than her daughter, but they were really more interested in keeping quiet and keeping their property and other holdings, so they spoke as little as possible about the war. The old lady was upset by the war much as Felicity's grandfather had been upset by it. The idea of such radical change in government was hard for her to accept. Felicity couldn't hold that against her. Luckily, though, the since Mrs. and Miss Prentis were so careful to avoid talking too much about the war, their personal politics did not prove to be a problem in Williamsburg, although the fact that they both thought was a dreadful waste of human life and resources was no secret. They were not alone in that.

They instead told Felicity many stories about what Ben had been like as a young boy that delighted Felicity. Ben had so seldom talked about himself. His oldest brother, Brandon, had apparently been left in charge of Ben quite often when they were younger, with disastrous results.

"He was always losing Ben," Louisa laughed. "His mother wished often, and loudly, that she'd had a girl first, to watch the little boys, instead of a scamp like Brandon. He was always getting into trouble. If he hadn't been such a good-looking boy, I think it would have gone harder for him. He and Ben look the most alike of all the boys, both dark haired and dark eyed. They favor their father. The two middle boys favor their mother, who has lighter hair and hazel eyes."

Mrs. Prentis smiled. "Ben didn't make it easy for Brandon, though. He was always putting things in his mouth that didn't belong there, and he was fascinated by fire. He was always in the kitchens as a lad. He came close to burning the house down more than once and himself along with it, and once he put some quicklime in his mouth and frightened his mother nearly to death. She thought for sure she was going to lose him."

After a week had passed, however, Felicity began to wonder when the Prentis women would be returning to Yorktown. They were good company, but even the best company can become a chore after enough time had passed.

She was coming down the stairs one night, after helping he mother put her father to bed, when she heard Mrs. Prentis' voice coming from the parlor. "Now, Ben, you've been avoiding the subject long enough. It's time we had it out in the open. Your family has been discussing a match for you and Louisa with our family since you were children. You've long finished your apprenticeship. I wish you'd come back to Yorktown, but I have to admit that Williamsburg is a prosperous place, and the fact that you have a share in such a fine store is a good start for you. Your mother bid me, since your dear father, and my dear husband are both gone, to bring this long protracted business to an end. It's time you settled down, and Louisa would make you a fine wife. She is healthy and spirited."

"Oh, mother, please. You make it sound like you're selling a horse at auction!" said Louisa indignantly. "Ben and I haven't seen each other for years, until this past week. How do you know we'll suit each other?"

"Marriage is as much a business as running a store," retorted her mother. "It is also a way of life. It all comes down to what is proper. Your sisters all have been married for some time. It's time for you to come to terms." She looked at Ben down her sharp nose. "Louisa was meant to be a Davidson."

Felicity backed down the hall in horror, and fled up the stairs as quietly as she could. When she reached the top of the stairs, she began to pace. Surely Ben would not let this happen, let this long ago discussion between families stand in the way of the agreement he had with her father, and stand in the way of their love?

Meanwhile, both Ben and Louisa were shaking their heads. "You don't understand…" they both said at once, and then looked at each other.

"What doesn't she understand, Louisa?" Ben asked gently, hoping that if Louisa did not want to marry him, his problem would be solved.

"I do want to be a Davidson," she said firmly. "I want to marry Brandon, and he wants to marry me."

"What a childish notion! Brandon is much too old for you," her mother said in a huff. "He should have married someone else long ago. All of Yorktown sees him as a confirmed bachelor. It's pitiful. A man is nothing without a wife and family."

"They see him that way because you refused to listen to him. His mother refused to listen to him. I do not care how old he is, and I do not care what the neighbors think. I love him."

"Actually," said Ben with his eyes twinkling, "I think you and Brandon would be perfect for each other. And I know just how you feel. I want to marry a girl much younger than I am. Fortunately, her family doesn't object at all!"

Louisa laughed. "It's Felicity Merriman, isn't it?"

When Ben nodded bashfully it reminded her of the little boy she had so often seen mischief making in Yorktown. Louisa clapped her hands with joy. "I wondered why she was hanging on every word I said about you. She's sweet on you, and if you marry her, you'll not only get a lovely girl, you'll get the store, and you'll get to stay in Williamsburg and keep on sounding your patriot cause! Ben, I'm thrilled for you!"

She impulsively threw her arms around him and hugged him, and he grinned and hugged her back. "You'll make a wonderful wife, and the entire Davidson family will be proud to have you among us!"

While Louisa had been explaining her love for Ben's brother to her mother, Felicity had been creeping back down the stairs. She hated eavesdropping, but this was too important to her. She had to hear for herself that Ben's love for her was true. Unfortunately, she arrived in the hallway again just as Louisa was throwing herself into Ben's arms. All she heard was Ben's comment about what a wonderful wife Louisa would make, and his words, coupled with the sight of the tall girl in Ben's arms, caused her such pain that she fled back through the house in tears.

"Oh, very well," groaned Mrs. Prentis, too upset to even noticing Felicity as she raced away again, "but what Mrs. Davidson will say to this, I have no idea."

"I have a fairly good idea," said Louisa. "Brandon was going over there to talk to her while we were away. He's probably gotten her smoothed down by now. I'm hoping we can start planning the wedding as soon as we get back to Yorktown."

"Then all I can say," Ben sighed, much relieved, "is welcome again to the family. I am sure you will make a lovely bride for Brandon, and I hope I can be there to see you take your vows." He paused, though, and then added, "As for my own future vows, I beg you not to speak of my plans to my family yet. I want to tell them myself."

The Prentis women agreed that such news should come first hand, to Ben's added relief.

While Felicity wept and pummeled her pillow, Ben had the best night's sleep he had gotten in a long time. To him, life seemed perfect. He found out differently when Felicity did not come down to breakfast the next morning. Mrs. Prentis and Louisa had decided to leave that morning, and he had expected Felicity to come downstairs at least to say goodbye. Nan had caught a chill and was still in bed as well, and Mrs. Merriman was tending to her.

Fearing that Felicity was also indisposed, he knocked on her bedroom door as the two ladies were having their luggage carried downstairs to their waiting carriage.

"Go away!" Felicity shouted through the closed door.

"Felicity, our guests are leaving," he said, surprised. "Do you not wish to say goodbye?"

She jerked open her door in a temper. He was shocked by her blotchy, swollen face. "Are you going with them now, or will you be leaving later?"

"I will be going with Mr. Fitchett at the end of the week, once I finish getting Charles settled in," he said confused. "Why would I be going anywhere today with his mother and sister now?"

"I thought your future wife would want you back in Yorktown, to help plan the wedding," Felicity said icily. "I saw you embracing her last night. I assumed everything was settled. Did you enjoy watching me and my family making fools of ourselves over you when you were already promised to another?"

Ben swore, which he seldom did.

"Felicity Merriman, you are the fool. Do you honestly think I would treat you and you family so shamefully? Yes, Mrs. Prentis was hoping there could still be a match between Louisa and me, but Louisa quickly disabused her of that notion. She wants to marry my brother Brandon, and he wants to marry her. I was happy to welcome her to the family. I think she will make my brother an excellent wife, despite the difference in their ages, but I'm no longer so sure that things will be the same with us."

"Louisa is going to marry Brandon?" Felicity stared at him, stunned.

"Yes, my future sister-in-law is mature enough to understand what marriage means. I was wrong to think that you were as well. If you were not willing to trust me, when I was declaring my love for you, you must not have that much love for me. I'm only glad to find that out before the engagement was officially announced."

"Ben, please, I do love you…it's just…"

"It's just that you have a very poor way of showing it, is that it?" Ben shook his head sadly. "No, Felicity, if you could actually believe me guilty of such dishonor, you are not ready to be my wife."

He turned and walked away, leaving Felicity more miserable than ever.

She tried to talk to him several times during the week, but as hard as it was for him to restrain himself he always refused to discuss matters. "Felicity, I do not know what to think. When I come back from my Commissary duties, perhaps we can discuss it, but right now I am too angry."

He was angry, but he was hurt, too. Felicity had chosen to behave childishly, just when he had needed her to most be a woman. Neither of them said anything to Mr. and Mrs. Merriman, not knowing how to explain. Ben did not want to tell them how wrong he thought he had been about Felicity's feelings for him, and she did not want to explain how she had misunderstood the situation.

Luckily, the Merrimans put the moodiness of the two young people down to the fact that they were having to part without publicly announcing the ties between them, and to the fact that Ben was too busy helping Marcus get Charles settled in at the store to spend much time with their overly emotional daughter.

Felicity tried once more to speak to Ben before he left with Mr. Fitchett. Her father had just given the two men instructions, and was comforting his wife, who was worried to see Ben go, when Felicity finally got Ben alone.

"Ben, please believe me how sorry I am. I love you very much, and love makes me do foolish things. If you could understand how the love of a horse could make me go riding through Williamsburg in a borrowed pair of breeches, why is it so hard to believe that the love of the man I want to spend my life with could make me jealous?"

Ben had to smile slightly at that. "I told you before, Lissie, I don't know whether to be flattered or vexed, but you did hurt me, and saying you're sorry doesn't make the hurt go away. An apology is not like a dusting cloth that can wipe away the dirt and leave everything shiny and like new again. But I will think about what you said, and when I come back, we can reevaluate."

"You have to come back, Ben. It almost broke my heart to think there was a chance I was losing you. I could not bear to really lose you. Look, Ben!" She reached into her pocket and pulled out a small piece of material. She handed it to him. Ben turned it over in his hands. It was a small bag, embroidered with the words "Love is eternal."

"What is it?" He asked, confused.

"Smell it," she said solemnly.

He held it up to his nose, and sniffed. "Roses! Where did you find roses in February?"

"It's the rose you gave me in the garden the day you asked me to marry you. I pressed it, and kept it, and I want you to take it with you. If you still must give thought to our future together, I want you to think about what I told you that day. I told you that I would always love you, and that was the truth. I will always love you and I will wait for you forever, if I have to, and if you do not return, I promise you again, I will never want any other man."

She was crying then, and Ben forgave her in his heart, although he was not ready to forget. He took her in his arms, and brushed away her tears, and kissed her goodbye, as Mr. Fitchett pulled up in front of the house with the wagon.

Author's note: "Love is Eternal" is what was engraved inside the wedding ring Abraham Lincoln gave to Mary Todd.


	4. Chapter 4

It's Hard To Refuse You

Chapter Four

Aside from Mr. Merriman's continued recovery, and the fact that Nan had stopped getting chills and fevers ever other week once the spring weather set in, Felicity had little to be happy about that year. Everyone had expected that once France joined the war on the side of the patriots, that the war would end quickly, but it still dragged on.

Because of the disruption in mail service, she did not hear very often any more from Elizabeth Cole, and longed to know how her friend was faring, and how Annabelle's wedding had gone, and there were not nearly enough couriers from the front bringing back letters for her from Ben.

Thomas Jefferson was elected Governor of Virginia in June, but he was not supportive of Williamsburg remaining the capital of the state. He was trying to get the capital moved from Williamsburg to Richmond. Williamsburg was no longer in a central position in Jefferson's opinion, and Jefferson felt it was too close to the ocean, and in danger of British attacks. The war had definitely moved south. Felicity felt betrayed, and so did many other in Williamsburg, but her father was not among them.

"There will be a British attack on Williamsburg at some point. It may be sooner or it may be later, but it will happen," he told the family one night at dinner.

"Oh, Father! You do not mean that!" Felicity cried.

"I do," he said firmly. "The end of the war will be decided in Virginia. I'm sure of it. We must make plans on what to do if an attack occurs. I will discuss it with Ben when he comes home." Felicity felt a rush of affection for her father, for already considering Ben as good as a son. She knew he had considered Ben a member of the family for a long time, but he would not have previously consulted with Ben over something so important, so she was grateful to her father.

The only real change Mr. Merriman made to the family in Williamsburg for the time being was that he managed to get Ruth, Rose's niece to town. She was a wonderful servant and very nice girl, but she was as terrified as the rest of them at the idea of being caught in the middle of a battle. The only thing that pleased her was that her new master was much kinder than her old one.

Oh, if Ben would only come home, but the first time Mr. Fitchett returned, Ben was not with him, although Mr. Fitchett stopped at the Merriman house with a message for that family.

"He went to his family's place in Yorktown," Mr. Fitchett told them. "His brother was getting married, and he wanted to be there for the wedding. I am supposed to meet him there in two weeks. I can't blame the lad for wanting a bit of joy in such times as these. We've seen little enough of it. The armies on both sides are wearing down. It seems as if the war will last forever."

"How is Ben doing?" Mr. Merriman asked. "I wish I could be with you, but my lungs are still not strong enough for so much travel."

"Not to worry, Edward. Young Davidson is a fine young man and a brave one. He's seen things the like of which he has never seen before, but he's quick-witted and keeps a cool head. I am impressed, and you would be proud of him. You couldn't do any better yourself than that lad is doing."

Felicity glowed with pride, but she still worried, and she wished she could have gone with Ben to the wedding. She said a prayer for Louisa and Brandon Davidson's happiness.

Because she missed Ben so much, and it was a way to be close to him, she began to go to the store more often to help out Charles and Marcus. It freed Marcus to do other work for the Merriman family, and gave Felicity a chance to get to know Charles, who was only a couple of years or so younger than she was. She quickly became fond of the lad, who was quiet, hard-working and good natured. He only really came out of shell with Nan, who talked to him often. Felicity thought Nan must be missing Ben as well, as Ben had always been very kind to her.

"Are you sorry you missed Louisa's wedding?" Felicity asked Charles one day.

"Not really," said Charles. "She always treated me like a baby, even after I was not a baby anymore. And her friends were rather silly. Brandon's friends were always very serious, but I think Louisa and Brandon will get along all right. I do not think the wedding would have been much fun, though. It's hard right now to get everything you need to have a grand party, and I'm sure Louisa had her heart set on a grand party. They probably had dancing, too. I don't like to dance."

"Ben's that way. He never did like dancing," said Felicity, remembering the Ball he had escorted her to. "He just never took to it."

"I don't like being treated like a baby, or dancing very much either," said Nan, who was helping Felicity sort out some tinware, happy to be helping at the store for a change. She was heartily sick of being housebound. "Miss Manderly was trying to teach me the minuet, before I got sick. I don't know why I need to learn it. No one is going to want to watch me dance the minuet in Williamsburg now."

"You must learn the Virginia Reel, though," said Felicity. "That is so much fun. Here, Nan, I'll show you the steps."

Felicity began to whistle the tune, and dance around the shop, as Charles watched, interested in spite of himself. Eventually they included him in the impromptu lesson, and they all had a lot of fun until the Williamsburg midwife, old Mrs. Deare, walked in to buy a cone of sugar, and was shocked to find the young people hanging onto the counter, red faced and out of breath.

"You have too much time on your hands, Felicity Merriman," she said, shaking her head. "You need to settle down."

I wish I could, Felicity thought. Mrs. Fitchett's words had made her miss Ben more than ever.

The family went to the plantation for a visit in July, shortly after the General Assembly had made the decision to move the capital to Richmond the following spring. Their spirits were very low, but being at the plantation helped. Felicity liked visiting with Patriot, and the new horse. Saul had named him Hobgoblin, because of the funny blotches of white on his face. Felicity thought he was as beautiful and spirited as his sire, and once she had helped break him in, she often went riding on him. Plans were already in the works to breed Felicity's stallion again, to the same mare, but her father decided instead to take both Patriot and Hobgoblin back to Williamsburg.

"We may need more horses in town, if there is a British attack. I am thinking of leaving town and coming here, if we find out the British are coming. This place is off the main roads, and we might be safer here," Mr. Merriman confided to Felicity and her mother.

"We must decide what we want to move here," said Martha Merriman. "I brought some of our valuables with me when we came down this time. When we get home we must sort through what to take and what to leave, and have it ready."

Ben came to the plantation once, but could not stay long. He had to get back to town. He had stopped there first, to get news, and told them about how well Charles Prentis and Marcus were doing at the store, in spite of the fact that business was still poor. He agreed with Mr. Merriman that it would be safer to move the family to the plantation in case of attack, and suggested that they move some of the store's stock to the Merriman house.

"If the British burn the town, the way they did Danbury," Ben said, "they will certainly make sure to burn the store. I am not so sure about the house. If you have any warning at all, though, of an attack, take everyone and come back here."

"But where will you be?" asked Felicity, anguished.

"No matter where we are, if Mr. Fitchett and I hear of an attack on Williamsburg, we will come home. I promise you. He will not want to leave his wife to face the redcoats alone, and I will want to make sure you are all safe. But take everyone, Mr. Merriman. Close the store, take the children, and Charles, and the slaves and leave if you have any sign of trouble. Don't try to be a hero."

"Heroes are honored," Felicity pointed out.

"That is because they are often dead," Ben answered.

Before he went back to town, he took a walk with Felicity to the stables to see the new horse. He agreed with Felicity that Hobgoblin was a beauty. They saddled up Patriot and Hobgoblin, and went for a ride. They went back to the place in the woods where Ben had hidden, living on berries, when he had run away from the Merriman's so long ago. They tied the horses to a branch, and let them graze while they sat for awhile on the ground beneath the tree where Felicity used to bring Ben food and bandage his injured leg. He remembered his bed of pine boughs well.

"I still have a scar on that leg. I remember sitting here, and waiting for you to come to care for me. I'd forgotten how green a place it is," Ben said, looking around. "I was too worried then to appreciate the beauty of it. I've been so many places since then, and I haven't had a chance to really look at any of them. War is not what I thought it was, Lissie. It's not marching to a drum, and uniforms, and glory. It's blood and death and misery."

"I've never heard you talk that way," said Felicity sadly, leaning against his shoulder. "You were always so sure of the rightness of the cause."

"I still believe in the cause. I still believe in freedom," said Ben, putting his arm around her, "but we are paying a terrible price for it. If I had run away from here, and gone to join the army, I'd be dead now. I know it."

"Then I'm glad I convinced you not to go," said Felicity, "for you mean much more to me alive than you would if you had died that hero's death. I was really angry with you, though, in those days. I think it was because I cared so much, although I didn't know at the time what it meant. I just knew you were disappointing me. But that was long ago. All that matters is that I still care."

"You disappointed me, too, Lissie, but I do not think that matters anymore, either. I think of you every day, and your rose is my greatest treasure."

Felicity looked at him solemnly. "I did many things that you have a right to blame me for, but I will keep asking for your forgiveness until I finally get it."

"I think we both know that there's blame to share. I was not sure of our feelings for each other when you were, then you were not sure of our feelings for each other, when I was. What about now, Lissie?" Ben asked her.

"I have never been so sure of anything. Ben, do you have to go away again? Can't we just be married and begin our lives together? What is stopping us?"

"Honor," answered Ben. "I cannot desert the true heroes of this war, the ones who do the fighting for our freedom that I cannot do, but I want you to know Felicity Merriman, that I love you. Those three words have my life in them."

"I love you, too," said Felicity. Then his lips were on hers, and the warmth of them was spreading within her once more. She tugged at him, pulling him close and whispering, "Oh, please, Ben, please." They slid to the ground. She did not have enough breath left to get knocked out of her, as she fell onto the forest floor and felt his body against hers, but he reluctantly ended the kiss.

"'Tis a fitting place to continue what we started, but as hard as it is for me to refuse you, I think it is a most inappropriate time," Ben gasped, rolling onto his side, facing her.

"Some day, perhaps," said Lissie, looking at him mischievously. "We'll be able to finish what we've started here. You can tell our grandchildren about it when they come to visit. They will find you most daring."

"You would talk about such things to children," Ben said, sitting up, laughing. "You were always a bold-faced little thing."

They reluctantly got back on the horses. As they rode back to the stables, Ben asked Felicity to make him a promise. "If things go wrong in Williamsburg, keep yourself safe. Do not worry about me, or the store, or the house. Come to the plantation, and watch for me."

"I cannot promise you that, Ben, for I will worry about you every day, until we can be together."

"Why," said Ben, "am I not surprised? You are not only bold, Miss Merriman, you are stubborn."

"Only when I know I am right," Felicity answered, and kicked her horse into a gallop as she rode into the stable yard.

Ben came home for Christmas depressed. The Merriman's had come back to Williamsburg for the holiday and learned that the British were fighting the Continental Army in Georgia, and things were not going well. It was getting harder and harder to provide provisions for the men. Felicity and Nan decorated the house with holly, ivy and mistletoe, and Mrs. Merriman put all she had into making them all a festive Christmas dinner.

When they made their Christmas wishes, they all wished for peace in 1780. There were still carolers willing to sing on the streets of Williamsburg in spite of the war, however, and when they passed the Merriman house singing the old song, "I Saw Three Ships", Charles and Nan looked at each other, smiled, and began to sing as well. Then the whole family joined in.

The British captured Savannah, and when the somber news arrived at the beginning of the year, Williamsburg grew anxious. In May, British troops captured Charleston, South Carolina, and in June the capital of Virginia was to be moved, out of Williamsburg, and eventually to Richmond.

One bit of good news was that General Lafayette had returned to the colonies. When he had arrived on April 28, 1780, it had been to a deafening welcome. More French help was expected any day, and Lafayette, who was being put in command of the Light Division, was clothing the American forces, which were sorely in need, at his own expense.

Ben came home again in June with the news that Louisa had given his brother a son, He had been named Adam. Felicity was pleased to hear the news, but a little bit jealous, too. She had spend many hours daydreaming of what life would be like after the war, when she and Ben were married, living in their own home, raising children of their own. She sometimes even wished that Ben would compromise her and give her a baby.

If he dies, she used to think, I will have nothing of him. Then she would quickly say a prayer asking forgiveness for having such wicked thoughts. But she could not help them. She was in love and wanted to be with the man she loved. She was a healthy, vital young woman who felt a need she could not explain for that man. Every time she saw him, every time she kissed him in greeting, and then again in goodbye, she became more depressed.

The colonists grew hopeful when 4,000 French troops arrived in the Americas in July, but the news that the British, under General Cornwallis had defeated the American troops under General Gates, in Camden, South Carolina left everyone dejected again.

The greatest shock of all came in September, when it was learned that the commander of West Point, Benedict Arnold, had turned traitor and made a deal with the British to turn over the fort. If the plan had succeeded, the entire Hudson Valley would have been open to the British. The plan was foiled, but Arnold managed to escape to a British warship, and was said to have been well paid for his treachery.

He returned in January of 1781 with 1,200 men and did a great deal of damage. When they were reinforced with 2,000 more soldiers, General Washington had to dispatch General Lafayette with 1,200 soldiers to stop them. He arrived in April, and Nathaniel Greene was bravely battling Cornwallis in the Carolinas, but mutinies were occurring in the Continental Army. The men wanted their pay, and food and clothes. Felicity suffered the news on her eighteenth birthday that the hated Cornwallis was marching from North Carolina to Virginia. The family debated about whether or not to leave town but decided to wait a bit longer, when they learned that General Anthony Wayne had joined Lafayette, increasing the number of troops in Virginia to 4,000. That gave Felicity more hope. She greatly admired Lafayette.

Cornwallis reached Petersburg in May, and his 8,300 men still outnumbered Lafayette. He then attacked Charlottesville, which was serving as a temporary capital, and seized seven Virginia legislators. He had come without hours of capturing the governor, Thomas Jefferson.

Edward Merriman decided the time had come to move his family away from Williamsburg. They packed up everything they could carry away to the plantation, and hid as many of their valuables as they could. Felicity did not want to leave. Due to a large loan that had come through from the French, the American soldiers were no longer mutinous. They had been able to buy food and clothing, and some had sent money home to their families. Plus it was common knowledge that Lafayette's forces had moved near Williamsburg.

"Ben will be able to come home!" Felicity cried to her father, hugging him when she heard the news.

"If he can get through," her father warned her gently. "He has several armies in his way. We cannot wait for him, Felicity. He knows what our plans are. If he does not find us here, he will follow us to the plantation. Now, come."

Felicity was supposed to follow the loaded wagons, and the crowded carriage containing her family and their most valuable possessions, on Hobgoblin, while Charles rode Patriot. But about an hour after they set out, she changed her mind.

She drew up alongside of Charles. "Tell my father I could not do it," she told Charles. "I'm going back to wait for Ben. That is my house and I will not leave it to Cornwallis' men."

The lad groaned. "Felicity Merriman I could no more tell your father such a thing than I could flap my arms and fly! He will kill me for not stopping you!"

"No, he will not," said Felicity confidently. "Because he knows when I am determined, I cannot be stopped. Good luck, Charles. I will see you soon."

She wheeled her horse around and set off back toward Williamsburg. The rutted roads were dark and deserted when she reached the edge of town. She got Hobgoblin into the stable, rubbed him down and gave him some oats. She went into the house, and waited by the window. She had fallen asleep, with her head on her arm, when she heard someone riding down the silent and deserted street. She looked out the window, and saw Ben stop and look up at the dark house. Just as he went to turn his horse and ride away, she threw open the window and called his name.

Luckily, he heard her, and as soon as he saw her, he rode his horse around back toward the stables. She ran through the house and out into the yard, crying with happiness. The welcome she got was not what she expected, however. Ben was furious with her.

"Felicity Merriman, you are a foolish girl! Are you here alone? How can this be? Why did you not evacuate with your father? What were you thinking? Cornwallis' troops are right outside the village. I was but steps ahead of them!"

"I couldn't leave this house Benjamin Davidson! It's my house, our house, my dowry, do you not remember? I will not let it go! And I could not leave without you."

"I almost left without you," he retorted, as he unsaddled his horse, and rubbed the animal down briskly. "Quiet, Daisy. Good girl! He glanced across the horse's broad back at Felicity. "I never dreamed that you would still be here. Your father should have tied you across your saddle if necessary and taken you out of town. How did you ever convince him to let you stay?"

"I didn't," Felicity admitted. "I was following the wagons on Hobgoblin, and decided to turn back. I told Charles to tell him where I was going." She was shocked at how Ben looked. He was as thin as a rail, and had sunken cheeks and huge shadows under his eyes, as if he had not eaten or slept in days.

"God help poor Charles," Benjamin snapped. "Come on, let us finish getting this wretched animal rubbed down, fed and watered and get back into the house. We can talk there. She isn't exactly a thoroughbred, but after Mr. Fitchett and I got separated, I was lucky to get her and she's served me well on the trip home."

After Daisy the horse was cared for, and safe in a stall across from Hobgoblin, Ben grabbed Felicity by the arm and started to steer her into the house. "Let's go into the kitchen," she said. "I'll make you something to eat. You do not look like you have had a square meal in a month."

"I have not," he answered, as she stirred up the fire, put on a pot of leftover soup that Rose and Ruth had forgotten to put away as they had fled. She began to slice him up a loaf of bread that was dry, but still edible.

"Things have been so mixed up. Lafayette is nearby with his men, but some of Cornwallis' troops are definitely heading into town. From what we can gather, his orders have been confusing. First Cornwallis was ordered to establish a naval base, and to send some of his troops to New York, but then other orders came, telling him to position his troops on the York River, near the Chesapeake Bay. He has decided to make his base in Yorktown. Lafayette should be able to trap him there, if he's quick enough, but we will definitely be caught in the middle of the two armies here. We should eat quickly and try to get away from here."

"Ben, we can't do that," said Felicity, putting the bread down in front of him. "No one can get down those roads at night, no matter how familiar they are with them, and both of those horses are worn out. They would fall down beneath us if we tried to ride out to the plantation tonight. Plus, we don't know for sure if either army will reach the plantation. They are off the main path, but they are just as caught between the two armies as we are." As Ben wolfed down a piece of bread, Felicity suddenly thought some more about what he had said. 

"Cornwallis is going to Yorktown? Oh, Ben, what about Louisa and Brandon and the baby? Are your mother and your other brothers safe? What will become of Charles' mother and his other sisters?"

He looked pained. "I have no idea of what will happen." He ate more bread, and three servings of the soup she gave him, and it seemed to help, but it was clear that he was worn out.

"Come into the house," she said after he had eaten. "You can sleep in my parent's bedchamber. You can not sleep in the stables alone, and I do not want to be alone in the house."

"All right, if that's what you want. Just let me get the rest of my things out of the stables, so I at least have fresh clothes to wear tomorrow. I'll clean up a bit, rest a bit, and then we can decide what to do." He was so exhausted he was becoming dazed.

She helped him get his things into the empty bedchamber, and once he had collapsed into the bed and was sound asleep, she looked in, and closed the curtains more tightly around him. When she got to her own room, however, she realized she did not want to be alone at all. She put on her nightdress, and went back into the other bedchamber. Ben was still sleeping deeply, with one arm thrown up over his head. He looked young and defenseless and sweet. The bag with the rose petals in it, dirty now, and tattered, was lying on the nightstand next to the bed. He had kept his promise to her, to have it by him always. Felicity took a deep breath, and climbed into bed beside him. He slept on, and eventually, lulled by his warmth, his even breathing, and the sound of his heartbeat, so did she.

As Ben came awake in the morning, just after dawn, he whispered her name.

"I am here, my dearest love."

He opened his eyes and saw her lying beside him, her bright red hair tumbling freely across the white pillow like a flame. "I thought I had dreamed this. I dreamed I was home, and that I found you."

"That was no dream, Benjamin Davidson. We are together, and I'm not letting you go again. We will be together always."

She slid her arm across his chest and kissed him. "I've dreamed of you, too, so many times, and now you are here, in the home we were meant to share. Who knows what will happen during the battle nearby? But if you still want me here, I am yours."

He knew at once what she meant. "God help me, Felicity, but you are all I want. This time I cannot refuse you. The whole world could burn down around us, and I would not care," and he began to kiss her back.

He was not sure if she'd be too shy to let him see her, but he had waited for her so long, and wanted her so much, that he took the chance and began to undress her. Felicity had no qualms whatsoever about what he was doing. In fact, she helped him, and helped him undress himself.

He paused for only a moment, to say, "You know this is wrong."

Felicity shook her head. "Nothing was ever more right."

"Are you sure this is what you want?" 

"More than anything," was her answer.

The sight of her, lying in the bed beneath him, took his breath away. Her skin was like porcelain and her eyes were bright. He began to kiss her again, and she opened to him freely, with innocence and love. Ben was as gentle as he could be, and after he had made love to her, he held her, stroking her incredibly bright hair, telling her how much she meant to him and how he had missed her. Then he made love to her again, and having a better idea of what was going to happen, she was more responsive and felt less pain, making it even better than the first time.

While they were making love, British troops were setting up camp on the Village Green and the grounds of the College of William and Mary. They broke into shops, and demanded food at the inns. They eventually began to search the houses. Around the noon hour, Ben and Felicity saw men in British uniforms coming toward the house they considered their own. Ben went out on the porch to meet them, and Felicity stood right behind his shoulder.

"You there! What is your name?" asked the commander.

"Benjamin Davidson, Sir, and this is my wife."

Felicity was surprised at that, but said nothing.

One of the men looked at him closely, curiously. "Davidson? Are you related to Brandon Davidson of Yorktown? You look just like him."

"He is my elder brother, Sir." Ben stared right back into the man's eyes.

"The Davidsons are Loyalists, Sir. I know the family well," the man said to the officer.

"Then we will leave this house alone. I will set a guard before it. But mind you do not leave it, or my men will leave, too, and I will not be responsible for what happens to it. I will expect you to feed them while they are on duty."

The soldier gave Ben a cursory salute, which he did not return, and the men headed down to the street.

"They think we are Loyalists?" Felicity hissed, as soon as they were out of earshot. "I'd almost rather they did burn the house!"

Ben sighed and led her back indoors. "Felicity, what good would it do for the patriot cause to let the house burn? What good would it do the Continental Army if the redcoats killed us? Let it go. One good thing has come of it. If the British think my family is Loyalist, then Brandon, Louisa and the baby will probably not be harmed by them in Yorktown."

"That is true. That is true," Felicity said distracted as she watched the soldiers begin to search a nearby house. She suddenly looked back at him. "Ben? Do you suppose we made a baby this morning? That must be how it is done, unless there is something else that you still have to show me." Felicity had seen horses, cows, sheep and rabbits mating, but none of that had prepared her for the unique experience of making love.

Ben colored slightly. "We might have, but I hope we did not. The British may believe that we are married, but you father certainly knows we are not, and I do not want to think about what he would say to me if he returned from the plantation to find you with child."

"We'll have to wait and see, I suppose. Now, what should I do about supper?"

The British troops stayed in Williamsburg for ten days. They did not fire the town, as the townsfolk had feared, but they stole livestock, and anything else that they could carry away.

Felicity found out during that time that she was not having a baby. She was almost disappointed. She had a very clear picture in her mind of what it would be like to be sitting with Ben holding their baby. She had thought about it so many times.

When she told Ben that her time had come, he was relieved, although he missed making love to her for those few days. He could not understand her regret.

"Felicity, you should be glad. With everything else that is going on, at least I do not have to worry about you being a carrying woman. It's just too soon, my love."

"But why didn't it work? What if I'm like old Mrs. Deare, and we are married for thirty-five years and never have a baby? And she a midwife! If anyone would have known how to catch a babe, you think it would be a midwife."

"Maybe she became a midwife to help others, simply because she could not help herself. Who knows? Can we at least actually get married first before you worry about it? It just does not work every time."

They were both relieved several days later when Continental troops arrived. General Washington even came to town, and the French General Lafayette, was there to greet him. They brought the news that a French fleet was blocking the Chesapeake Bay, so there was no rescue possible for Cornwallis from the sea. The British had to dig in at Yorktown. They were preparing for a siege. Tensions grew. It was clear that a major battle would be taking place soon. Some of the soldiers on both sides began to desert, but definitely more British than Americans.

Felicity and Ben remained in Williamsburg. He tried to make repairs to the store, which had been damaged by the British, and to his surprise, someone had inflicted heavier damage after the British left.

Ben had made his first hurried inspection right after the redcoats had gone, but the next day when he had returned to secure it further, the damage had been worse. He wondered privately if someone in town wished him or the Merrimans ill, but he did not tell Felicity about the additional destruction. He did not wish to worry her further. . Not much was left in the store, because the Merrimans had removed much of the stock before they had fled, either hiding it at the house, or taking it with them. Ben and Felicity were afraid to leave the town and didn't know if they could make it to the plantation anyway, as much as they longed to be there. They could only pray that everyone there was all right.

Ben was taking down the broken sign at the store one day, when Mr. Fitchett came by, looking grim. He asked Ben to meet him at Christiana Cambell's tavern that evening, which had become a favorite meeting place for Williamsburg patriots since General Washington had declared it his favorite spot in town.

"What does he want?" Felicity asked, as she gave Ben his supper.

"I have no idea," Ben said honestly. "He could have news of someone we met when we were on the road. He could want me to do something for the army. I have no idea."

Several men of the town were waiting at the tavern when Fitchett arrived. They were all upset with Ben Davidson because the redcoats had spared the Merriman house on the grounds that it was a house sympathetic to the Loyalist cause. Fitchett was trying to quiet them.

"The lad served the Commissary well. He would have gone into the army himself years ago, if he had not wished to keep his contract with Edward Merriman. Then when his contract was up, it was Merriman who was serving the Commissary. The lad is not a Loyalist, and never was."

"Then he must explain himself," said Jeff Galt, menacingly. "And explain why he is still sleeping with Merriman's daughter out of wedlock."

"Oh, Galt, are you still bitter about the Merriman girl?" asked Fitchett. "She spurned you, it's true, but favoring Davidson's suit over yours does not make her a Loyalist spy. Was the girl supposed to live in that house alone during the occupation? Would you have rather the redcoats had used her for their pleasure? Whatever Davidson did, I'm sure he did it to protect her. And he is betrothed to her. He told me so when we were working for the Commissary. Edward Merriman intended to announce it as soon as the girl turned eighteen. He thought his daughter too young to wed before that age. "

"But he is not here, and nothing was ever announced. And an engagement is not a marriage," Galt pointed out, but several men disagreed with his stubborn refusal to let the subject go.

"It is not proper to speak of such things. We did not see, and we do not know, what the relationship is between the Merriman girl and the Davidson boy. But if he has secretly been aiding the Loyalists, that is another matter," said old Mr. Deare.

When Ben arrived, he found a mostly hostile group of men facing him. Fitchett looked at him with pity.

"You're being accused of being a Loyalist spy, because the redcoats spared the Merriman's house and livestock. I have given my own defense of you. What have you to say for yourself?"

Ben looked around at the group grimly. "The house was spared because one of the men in the British company knew my elder brother, who is, alas, a Loyalist. He assumed I was as well, and I let him think that. It was necessary to save the house and protect Felicity Merriman."

"Wanted to keep her for yourself, did you?" sneered Galt.

"Aye, as a matter of fact I did. I am going to marry that girl, and her parents have agreed to the match. I love her and I would die to protect her. Indeed, I told the British she was my wife, and God willing, she will be just that, as soon as possible."

Fitchett nodded. "These are desperate times, and call for desperate measures. And this lad is certainly not the only one of us who has family members with Loyalist ties. My father-in-law, the old wretch, is still loyal to the crown."

Galt shook his head. "I will never shop in Merriman's store again, or visit his home. They survived due to lies, treachery and fornication. And I will advise everyone I know to avoid it as well, Davidson, for as long as you remain in town!"

"Do what you must," Ben said, with dignity, "and let every other man do the same. Did not Edward Merriman tell the town the same thing, when he stopped selling tea? The tide was moving the other way then, was it not?"

He left them, and many present were impressed by his eloquence and firm conviction. He did however wonder if one of the men at the tavern had been involved with the extra damage to the store he had found earlier that week.

When Ben told Felicity that he had been accused of having Loyalist ties, she was upset, but not entirely surprised. It had been a humiliating experience for her, to be under the protection of a British commander, and have to feed redcoats. She was furious, though, that Jeff Galt had brought up the intimacy that she and Ben shared.

"Perhaps we should restrain ourselves, for the time being," Ben offered wearily, as she railed against her former suitor. "We can mark it down as a thing born of the heat of battle, be glad that you bear no proof of my abuse of you, and right the wrong I have done you as quickly as we can. I must admit, I do not feel right sleeping with you in your parent's bed."

"Then we shall go and sleep in my bed, but I am not ashamed of you, Ben Davidson, or of anything we have done. I am proud to have belonged to you, and I want to continue to prove my love for you. The battle had nothing to do with it. It but gave us the opportunity we previously had lacked to commit to each other. And you never abused me. I wanted you as much as you wanted me. I still want you. I want you right now."

"That is not the statement of a lady," Ben told her gently.

"But Ben, being with you is like heaven! Aren't ladies supposed to feel that way? Don't all ladies feel that way?" Felicity was genuinely puzzled.

"Not from what I have heard," he said, a bit embarrassed to be discussing such a subject at Edward Merriman's dining room table.

"Then they must not have men as kind and as handsome as you are to comfort them at night, or must not have loved the men they married, is all I can say," said Felicity, getting up out of her chair.

"Where are you going?" Ben asked, puzzled.

"To change the sheets in Mother and Father's bedroom, and to air out my own. I will see you upstairs shortly, I trust?"

Ben watched her walk away, wide-eyed.

The siege of Yorktown was a long one, and many men were killed or injured. The former Governor's Palace in Williamsburg was turned into a hospital and its gardens were turned into a cemetery. The town was looking quite battered.

Felicity was outside one afternoon, trying to find enough apples left on the trees to make applesauce, when Mrs. Deare approached her and, glancing around to make sure they were alone, brought up the painful subject of Felicity's unmarried state.

"Your dear mother is not here, Felicity, and I feel obliged to speak to you in her stead. I've known you since I helped bring you into this world, and loved you like my own child. I worry about you now."

"Then tell the men in this town that Ben Davidson is not a Loyalist, but a patriot, and a fine man I will be happy to call my husband," Felicity said bluntly.

"I hope that day comes quickly," said Mrs. Deare, "for if you are doing what they say, it is not fitting."

"I have a good man, and I love him with all my heart and soul. He has asked my father for my hand. How can that be wrong? I wish I had been able to marry Ben, months ago, but it was not to be. We were at cross-purposes for a long time, but now I have him and I will not let him go because of the gossip of some old cats. No matter what my state, I have never been so happy."

"He treats you well? In all ways? You have not had any problems because of...the way he uses you?"

"Oh, no, it's wonderful," Felicity answered. "I never knew it would be such bliss to be so close to another.

The old lady smiled. "You're lucky in that, you know. It's such a shock to some girls that they never get over it. Come and kiss me, Miss Felicity Merriman. I always wondered what would become of you. You were prickly as a cocklebur, even as a child, and always running wild. You needed a good man to settle you down, and I'm glad you found one. At least he's hardworking, steady, handsome and clean. There were times when I expected you to run off and wind up waving a cutlass on a pirate's ship."

Felicity laughed, and gave the old woman the kiss she requested. "I often thought of doing just that. Elizabeth Cole and I spoke of it a few times." She thought for a brief moment about asking Mrs. Deare about how long it usually took for babies to start coming, but decided that would not be prudent, just yet.

Felicity was happy to know that there was someone she could go to, if she had any questions about private matters, but she missed her mother no less. Her mother, she knew, would have been shocked, but would surely have forgiven her, and still have loved her and Ben just as much. It was impossible to get mail through to the plantation or from it.

Cornwallis knew he could not hold Yorktown if he could not get help. An attempt was made to send the infantry over the river to Glouchester Point, but a storm came up and the plan was abandoned. The British at Yorktown were going to have to surrender. It was just a matter of time.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter Five

By October 17th, 1781, the French and American fight with the British over Yorktown had become heavier than ever before and many of the British soldiers were sick or wounded. Food was scarce and most of them were exhausted. Cornwallis decided, after inspecting the British fortifications that day that the situation was hopeless. He and his staff decided that Yorktown could no longer be defended.

A British soldier was sent to the front of the lines to play a drum roll, which was a signal for negotiation, and a British officer soon appeared waving a white flag. He had a message for Washington from Cornwallis. A temporary truce was declared. Lafayette's brother-in-law, the Viscount de Noailles, and Colonel John Laurens represented the French and Americans at the negotiations, which took place in Moore House, a private home behind American lines. Lieutenant Colonel Thomas Dundas and Major Alexander Ross represented the British. The agreement they struck was signed by Cornwallis on the 19th.

He was to take his British officers back to England. His troops would be held as prisoners of war until the war officially ended. As the surrender ceremony was taking place, British troops in New York were preparing to come to the aid of Cornwallis, but they were too late.

There would be several more small military engagements before the final end, but the American Army had won. Peace talks would begin in April, but they were just a formality. King George III was going to have to consider the ramifications of American independence, and most British leaders were totally convinced that the war was not worth pursuing. Even Lafayette would be on his way to Paris by the end of the year.

When the news reached Williamsburg, Felicity and Ben were thrilled. The war had left the town in shambles, but they were free to go on with their lives. As soon as the roads were somewhat safe, they set out for the plantation, on Hobgoblin, and Daisy, the horse Ben had ridden home from his last trip with the Commissary, to see how the rest of the family had fared. They were eager to get away from Williamsburg, where they were still facing some suspicion and much scorn, and longed for a merry Christmas, shared with family. Felicity had never spent a Christmas on the plantation, and was curious as to how her family would honor the day in the country setting.

As they rode, Ben said to Felicity gently, "I have to tell your father the truth, much as I fear doing so."

"You are an honorable man, Benjamin Davidson, and I respect you for that, but we must tell him, not just you. We are lovers, and must share in all we say and do. It was not just your choice, but mine as well."

"Now that the war is over, I intend to make an honest woman of you, Felicity Merriman."

"I'm already honest," she said simply, wrapping her cloak around her more tightly against the cold wind that was blowing them down the road.

They were seen before they reached the house. Mrs. Merriman recognized Felicity's scarlet cloak, bright against the barren earth. She always made Felicity a scarlet cloak for the winter. Mr. and Mrs. Merriman were waiting to greet them when the pulled up to the house. Mrs. Merriman, unable to wait another moment, ran out of the house, after hastily pulling a black cloak over her shoulders, and hurled herself on her daughter.

"Oh, my darling! You're all right! I have been worried sick about you. Why did you not come with us in the first place?"

"Ben and I saved the house, Mother," Felicity said, wrapped tightly in her mother's embrace, as her father came out and stroked her bright hair. "There was some damage to the store, which Ben has mostly fixed, but the house is all right."

Edward Merriman clasped Ben by the shoulder as Saul came to lead the horses away. "However did you manage it? We feared that the British would have the house burned over Lissie's head!"

"One of the British soldiers knew my oldest brother," Ben admitted. "He told the commanding officer that Davidsons were Loyalists. I'm not proud of it, but I convinced myself that the end justified the means. I told them Lissie was my wife, and they did not harm her."

"There are others in town who are not pleased with us right now," Felicity said, "but I do not care."

"They would not be pleased with us, either, I think," Edward Merriman said wearily, "to hear that we had British soldiers in our home."

"Did the British come here? Did they stay here?" Lissie asked, looking up at the house as they went in. It looked the same. Her parents had aged so much in such a short time that it shocked her. They had both gotten thinner, and grayer in the hair and face since she had seen them last, but the plantation, to her relief, was exactly as she remembered it. There was some small damage to the outside of the buildings, and the ground was torn up where men had marched and equipment had been dragged, but it did not look too bad

Nan met them at the door, and Charles was standing right behind her. She, too, flung herself on her sister. "Oh, Felicity, you are all right! I missed you so. I cried when I thought of all of the arguments we used to have! I could not bear to think of losing another loved one!" Felicity was shocked at this display of emotion from her sister, who had so often seemed envious of her in the past.

Ben glanced at Edward Merriman. "What does she mean?"

"Come in," Edward said soberly, "and we will tell you everything."

A monstrous silence fell over the group as they went into the house, and all sat down in the parlor. Lissie sat on the sofa, next to Ben, and looked around. "Where are William and Polly?"

"Polly is upstairs in bed. Rose and Ruth are tending to her for the moment. She has been very ill. A fever came to the house and struck both William and Polly. We could do naught to heal it at first, but Polly is getting better now," said her mother. "Your brother…has died."

Ben reached out and gripped Felicity's hand tightly. The words echoed in her mind. "Your brother has died…your brother has died...your brother has died." The words took her breath away. This was the one thing she had never even considered.

"What happened?" Ben asked gently. "Tell us everything."

"The British were moving from Williamsburg to Yorktown. They came up the path from the road, and I met them on the porch," said Edward Merriman.

"Oh, Father, how brave that was of you! Ben did that at our house, too," Felicity said, trying to get her mind to work again.

"They told us to leave…that they would be burning the house. I told them they would have to burn it over our heads, for there was sickness here, and my children could not be moved. I told the redcoats that my wife and I would not leave our children abed. A British doctor came and looked at them."

"You let a redcoat into the house and trusted him with the children?" Felicity asked, stunned.

"I had to, but I am glad I did. He saved your sister. I am sure of it. He helped us. The troops stole all the food that they could carry across their saddles while he was with us, but he helped us."

"The horses?" Felicity asked, picturing with horror some British officer riding her beloved Penny or Patriot. Penny was old now, much too old for a war horse. Losing Penny on top of everything else would have been too much for Felicity to bear. Penny had, after all, been the beginning of her friendship with Ben.

"Saul had hidden all the horses in the woods. They did not find them. They are back in the stable where they belong now. Have no fear of that," said Mrs. Merriman. "The British took the footpath behind the plantation to Yorktown. As the British were galloping away the doctor told us he thought Polly would get well, but William would not. He said that William did not have enough strength to recover. And he was right. We buried him next to your grandfather. I will take you to see him later if you like."

"I am glad you and Ben are home," Mr. Merriman added. Looking at Ben, he forced a small smile. "You are my son now."

"I cannot take his place, Sir, but I will do my best," said Ben sadly. It was the end of the Merrimans in a sense, the end of their name, and he vowed somehow to find a way to continue to honor it.

"Charles has been a great help," Mr. Merriman said, looking over at the auburn-haired boy, who seemed to have grown a foot since Ben had last seen him.

"Joy comes from sorrow," Mrs. Merriman added. "Charles and Nan have an understanding now."

Felicity whirled around distracted by this news to look at her sister. "You two are but sixteen!"

"I'm seventeen now," Charles said defensively.

Ben managed a slight smile. "And how old were you, Lissie, when we first spoke of marriage?"

"Well," Felicity said sheepishly, "It's just so much to take in at once. It seems like only yesterday I was watching her play with her toys and squabbling with her about whose turn it was to stir the applesauce. Now to think of her as a married woman…it amazes me."

"We will not marry until after I finish my apprenticeship and am able to afford a home for her," Charles said, taking Nan's hand. Looking at the two of them together, Felicity had to admit the plantation, and Charles, had been good for Nan. Her face was fuller now, and her cheeks were pink. She looked healthy and happy, but could not resist sniping once again at her older sister.

"You are a fine one to talk about how childish I am, Felicity. If you knew what you wanted at my age, why can't you believe I am the same way?" Nan said with a superior air, and Mrs. Merriman decided to change the subject before her impulsive daughter and her high-strung one had a chance to begin an argument.

"Let us see if we can get supper on the table," Mrs. Merriman said, standing up. "We just butchered one of the sheep, and have fresh mutton, and if I am not mistaken, there are a few bottle of wine left, that Rose hid in the cellar wall when the British soldiers came. We will celebrate this Christmas. We have our lost daughter back, and beloved faces to share our table. We will, as always remember those who have gone on, and look forward to a happy new year."

"I will go up and sit with Polly, so that Rose and Ruth can help you, Mother," Nan offered. "That's what I do best, after all, stay out of the way and help with the housework." She rolled her eyes.

"And I will go see if Saul needs help with the horses," Charles added hastily.

When they had gone, Felicity and Ben looked at each other. It was time to tell Mr. Merriman the truth.

"May I speak frankly, Sir?" Ben began. "We have much to say, and I would have it be for your ears alone, at least for now."

"Of course. You can tell me anything, Ben. Is it about your wedding plans? Now that the war is over, I assume you and Felicity wish to marry at once."

"We do, Father, but there are more reasons for that than simply the end of the war," said Felicity. "We told you about the problems we had in Williamsburg, because we had allowed the British to go on thinking mistakenly that we were Loyalists. We had other problems, too."

"You might as well here it from me, rather than from the gossips of the town, of which Felicity tells me there are many. I told you that the redcoats believed Lissie to be my wife. That is because we were living in your home together."

Mr. Merriman considered this, and then he shrugged. "I would not have wanted Lissie to stay in that house alone," Mr. Merriman replied at last. "I would have been disappointed if you had not shared it with her, during such an uncertain time. 'Tis no matter to me if you called her your wife to protect her, no matter what the town might think."

"If anyone had objected, Sir, they would have had just cause," said Ben, forging on. "I did not just call her my wife. We shared the house, yes, but while we were living together, we also shared a bed, as if we actually were husband and wife. While I am ashamed to have to admit such a thing to you, I will never be ashamed of the way I feel about your daughter."

Mr. Merriman looked up sharply, but before he could speak, Felicity added, "It was my choice. I was not forced. It was what I wanted, and a decision we made together. I needed Ben, and he needed me. We had nothing to depend on but each other. I love him and I am not sorry, nor ashamed of that."

"We want to make this right," said Ben earnestly. "We want to be married as soon as possible."

Mr. Merriman was silent for a moment. "While I confess, I am surprised at the both of you, I am not entirely surprised. You were in a very unusual situation. Very few young people in love, thrown together in such a way would find it hard to resist what might be their only chance to express that love in a physical way. But I fear I must ask you to answer me honestly. Is there more to your haste to marry than simply wanting to set things right, or is there a more pressing reason? Is there a child on the way as the result of this indiscretion?" He looked at Felicity hard, and she colored.

"No, Sir. I swear it."

"Then we will let it go." Mr. Merriman looked from Ben to Felicity. "You must understand…you will not be able to share a bed here. Your mother cannot stand another shock, and I would not have you setting such an example for your sisters. We will just let it go, and arrange for you to be married, as we always planned. Is that understood?"

"It seems more than fair, Sir," said Ben, as Felicity sighed with relief. The discussion had gone better than they dared to hope.

Felicity had her own discussion, with her mother, the next day as she sat by her sister's bedside. Polly was sleeping fretfully, twisting and turning in her bed, but looking at her, Felicity was comforted. It was clear that the British doctor had been right. Barring any sudden change, Polly was going to live.

Felicity held a basin of water for her mother, as she wiped off her little sister's thin limbs. She was startled when her mother said suddenly, "Your father told me about the conversation he had with Ben. He did not want to at first, but he decided he should. We do not keep secrets from one another."

"He had that conversation with both of us, Mother," Felicity replied, her eyes downcast. "We had to tell him the truth."

"The truth, Felicity, is that you are very lucky. You always were a headstrong girl, and let your emotions rule you, but I expected better of Ben. He never could refuse you anything but I still expected more from him. I still love you both, but I can't help thinking of the risk you took. Your whole life could have been ruined by what you did."

"Ruined by Ben?" Felicity shook her head. "He is the gentlest, most considerate man I know. No matter what, he would have loved me and cared for me just the same. He makes me so happy, Mother."

"I understand you were afraid of what the town might think of you. You had good reason to be. Would you have been so happy by what they would have called your child, if you were having one now? It would not have been a kind word."

"I would have been proud and happy to carry Ben's child. But it was not to be. Soon, though, we will be married and I will try again. Ben and I have no intention of living in sin under your roof, but at the time I did not consider it a sin. Nothing ever felt more right to me." Felicity looked at her mother with conviction. "Ben will be a good husband and father, Mother. You know he will. He will continue to work hard, and honor you as he always has. He will be a fine husband, and give you grandchildren you can be proud of."

"I just hope it will be in that order," Mrs. Merriman said tartly, and then her face softened. "I only wish your happiness."

Felicity and Ben would have been more upset over their lonely beds over the next few weeks if they had not been so terrifically busy. Many of her grandfather's slaves had run away after the British Army, seeking freedom. Felicity made it a point to thank the loyal servants who had stayed.

Saul, who had raised thoroughbreds with her grandfather for almost thirty years, looked at her impassively when she spoke to him. He was grooming Daisy and Hobgoblin, giving them the first thorough grooming they'd had in many a day. "Those that run off will come out of this war the same way they went in" he said cryptically. "Nothing is going to change for them. Besides, I like what I do. I like horses. And young Master Charles, he's been helping me. We've been getting along fine, for all that he is a city boy. He tries hard. He'll make young Miss Nan a fine husband. Your Master Benjamin will do you proud, too. He is a good judge of horseflesh, is Master Benjamin." There could be no greater compliment from Saul.

"I hope so," Felicity told him. "He's going to help you, too, as much as he can, and he'll do anything else that needs doing. Just let us know what you need."

Rose and Ruth were equally astonished to receive Felicity's thanks. Rose shook her head when Felicity had gotten done speaking. "I couldn't run off with that trash. Why should I? What would I do out there on the road, following the army? I didn't know what would become of me. The devil you know is always better than the devil you don't know. Besides, my family is here. Your father and grandfather promised me that I would always know where my husband and children were, and they kept that promise."

Ruth agreed that the uncertainty of life as a camp follower never had any appeal for her. "I couldn't leave your ma and pa, when they have been so kind to me. I was miserable, and they gave me a chance at a better life. They brought me to Williamsburg and treated me well."

The other servants said much the same. The fact that they were working harder than they had ever worked before, did not matter to them. The servants who had stayed were still willing to serve because they had been treated well by the Merrimans, and felt a loyalty to them. They were also impressed by the fact that the young people in the Merriman family worked on the plantation beside them, and worked hard. The Merrimans, they all acknowledged to each other, "didn't put on airs."

There was always something to do that winter. There was wood to be brought in, and water to be carried. The horses and cows and sheep needed tending. There was wool from the sheep that had not yet been spun, even though they had been sheared in May. The chickens were not laying well in the colder weather, but they still needed care. Clothing needed to be washed and patched and mended. Exhausted, Felicity longed for spring to come and the muddy roads to clear, so she could go back to Williamsburg, but at the same time she began to take pride in how well the plantation ran, how hard-working its servants were and how well it supported them all.

When the family had a chance to relax, they discussed the changes that had occurred in Williamsburg over the past year. The gaol had become a county facility. The last of the documents had been moved from the capitol offices and sent to the new buildings in Richmond. John and Lucy Paradise had regained the home that had been taken from them during the war. The confiscation had been jokingly known as "Paradise's loss

Ben, who'd had experience with his grandfather's tobacco farm as a young child, took well to plantation life. When he met with the field hands, at Edward Merriman's request, to discuss what they would plant in the spring, they found him intelligent, kind, and were surprised by his knowledge of farming.

The servants had been left to do as they wished for a long time, after Felicity's grandfather had died. They had been wary of having any of the Merrimans move back to the plantation permanently, fearing the changes it would require would be too hard on them, but to their relief things went easier than they had expected. The family treated everyone on the plantation fairly.

"These crops are easier to manage than tobacco," he assured Felicity and her father, when they were also discussing the plans for spring planting. "Tobacco ruins the soil. The second year's crop is usually the best, and then it gradually goes bad. You have to move the plants from one place to another, putting something else in those spots every few years, because tobacco is so draining to the soil. Neither wheat, not corn, nor oats is quite like that."

He also spent time with Saul, helping the men repairing the stables and barns, and discussing how they should breed the horses and cows. Felicity had been afraid that Ben would miss the store too much, but he did not seem to miss it at all. Charles seemed more anxious to get back to town than Ben did. Charles was in a hurry to finish his apprenticeship, so he could get started in a business of his own and begin preparing to support Nan. She also wanted to go back to town. Nan had found farm life much harder than city life. Her health had improved, after all of the childhood illnesses she had gone through, but she still was not as strong as a farm wife usually was.

Mr. and Mrs. Merriman watched both of their daughters and their young men closely, and spent many hours discussing the situation together. They were just waiting for the proper time to bring up their new ideas. It came when Ben received a letter from Yorktown, carried by a traveler. The envelope was bent and dirty, as if it had been handled for awhile. It was addressed to:

Master Benjamin Matthew Davidson

Care of Master Edward Merriman

Williamsburg, Virginia

Or

King's Creek Plantation

When Felicity saw the letter, she was surprised. "Why did you never tell me your other name was Matthew?"

"You never asked me," he replied, opening the battered envelope. "To be frank, I never thought my names went very well together."

"I do," said Felicity. "I think Matthew is a lovely name."

Ben scanned the contents of the letter, and said flatly, "My mother has died."

"Oh, no!" Felicity said, mourning the woman who had made her future husband who he was, and regretting that she had never gotten to meet her. She went into Ben's arms, and tried to comfort him.

The letter had been sent by Ben's brother, Brandon. He and Louisa and their baby son had survived the siege, but Ben's mother had not. In her final days, she had worried about her youngest son, and Louisa, breaking her promise to Ben to ease the old woman's last hours, had told her that Ben was courting the oldest Merriman girl, and that she favored his suit. It had brought Mrs. Davidson some comfort to know that her son had found happiness.

When the Merrimans heard this, they decided it was time to talk to Ben and Charles about their new idea. They gathered the family in the parlor over a precious bottle of the wine they had saved from the redcoats, for the announcement.

"Charles is eager to return to Williamsburg, and reopen the store," Edward Merriman began, "and Nan wants to go back to Williamsburg, do you not?"

"Aye," she said. "I want that more than anything," she replied.

"Ben, you have settled down well here at the plantation, and Felicity loves it very much, as I do," said Mrs. Merriman. "It is my father's legacy to his grandchildren, after all. Now that dear William is gone, we must reevaluate."

"I do love the plantation," Ben admitted. "I have been spending a lot of time with Saul. We feel it could be the finest horse farm in Virginia, given a bit of time."

"We were wondering," Mr. Merriman said cautiously, "if we should not change our plans. Perhaps we should give the house in Williamsburg to Nan, as her dowry. Ben, would you be willing to turn your share of the store over to Charles in exchange for the plantation? You deserve it most, after all. It is because of our service against the crown, yours and mine, that we are able to keep it. We were thinking we could all go back so that Lissie could be married in town, and then the two of you could return here to run it. Martha and I would stay with Nan and Charles until they are ready to marry."

"Ruth wants to go back to town, too," said Mrs. Merriman. "She would be able to help Nan run the house, while Rose and Marcus and their families stay at the plantation. They are looking forward to being together all year round."

Ben and Charles looked at each other.

"It's everything I ever dreamed of," Charles Prentis admitted, and Nan nodded, clinging possessively to his arm.

"What do you think, Felicity?" Ben asked her, hopefully.

"I think it's a grand idea," Felicity answered, "but not to wait too long." She looked at her father. "No matter where I live, I can be happy if I am Ben's wife."

"This is the only Christmas gift we can give you," said Mr. Merriman. "I hope it makes you happy. 1782 will be the year of new beginnings."

Later on she asked Ben if he were truly happy, and he looked at her astonished. "How could I not be? Your family has been very generous, and more understanding than I ever dreamed they would be. And it is better that Charles takes the store and makes a fresh start. There are too many in Williamsburg who would cut us, and the town is going through a decline right now anyway. Charles would have a better chance to turn things around than I would. I am happy to be getting the plantation instead of going back to town for good. I just regret the circumstances. Your brother was dear to me, and I feel certain he would have been a fine man."

"He is watching us, now, and rejoicing with us. I am sure of it," Felicity said simply, and Ben took her in his arms. They stood together, remembering William.

As soon as Polly was well enough to go, the Merriman family returned to Williamsburg, where the engagements of Felicity and Nan to Ben and Charles were announced in February. Nan was a bit put out by having to share her glory with her sister, but that could not be helped. Felicity found it harder to sleep in her lonely bed there at the house than she had at the plantation, as the banns were being published. Memories of waking up with Ben beside her, his strong arms around her, were hard to bear, but she knew it would be soon when they could be together again in that bed, and she was so busy with wedding plans that it was only late at night that she had time to think about what she'd had, and what she would soon have again. The fact that the store had become the Prentis store, and not Ben Davidson's, was indeed more acceptable to Williamsburg society.

In December of 1781, the Governor's palace had been destroyed in a fire. Felicity felt the loss of the building deeply, as it held many memories for her. The bricks from the building were being sold in 1782, and she was unhappy to see the history of the town being carted way, piece by piece.

Felicity did get her wedding in the Bruton Parish church, however, at the beginning of April, and that was a happy day for all of the Merrimans, no matter what anyone else in town thought. Brandon, Louisa and little Adam came from Yorktown for the occasion, with Ben's other brothers, Brett and Bryce, so the house in Williamsburg was filled to the brim with family. Ben had not seen his brothers since Brandon's wedding, and was proud and happy to be able to show them around Williamsburg, and tell them about the plantation. They thought Felicity a lovely girl, the Merrimans a hospitable family, and their littlest brother a lucky man. They found out later that the wedding date was the day the British Commons had voted to end the war in America, which made it even more meaningful to Felicity.

The Coles came, too. Felicity was glad to see them, but shocked to see how far down they had come in the world. As Loyalists, they had escaped with their lives, but lost nearly all of their New York property after Annabelle's wedding. They were thinking about going back to England, and living with Annabelle and Lord Harry while they reestablished themselves. Elizabeth did not want to go. She was even considering taking a job as a governess or teacher to be able to stay in America and not have to live with Annabelle. She loved her sister, but did not want to be beholden to her.

She passed the time giggling with Felicity, discussing old times, sewing, and learning to play chess. Her father and Mr. Merriman played often in the evenings, and she had watched Ben and Bryce play several times. Bryce had offered to teach her. It took her quite awhile to learn which way the pieces moved and she made many mistakes at first but after several evenings practice she began to get quite good. Elizabeth had always had a keen mind, and Felicity was happy to see her friend enjoying a good visit and a bit of pleasure.

Elizabeth was happy for Felicity, tried to be merry for Felicity's sake, but Felicity could see how depressed she was, even as they were reminiscing about what she and Felicity and Ben had been like at the start of the war. Felicity begged Elizabeth to come and stay at the plantation with her and Ben if her parents did indeed leave for England at the beginning of the summer.

"I'll think about it," Elizabeth said, "but wouldn't it cause problems for you and Ben?"

"I do not care," Felicity said fiercely, hugging her friend. "When the time comes, I will speak to Ben and I know he will listen."

The Coles got along very well with all the Davidsons, especially Bryce, who paid the most attention to them. He was sympathetic to them, funny and friendly. Felicity was pleased to see everyone getting along so well, and often found she was laughing at Bryce's teasing comments just as hard as the others. He and Brett were good looking men, with medium brown hair and wide-set eyes, deep and hazel.

Felicity liked all of Ben's brothers, especially Brandon, who gave her a hint of what Ben would look like in another ten years. Those two were the most alike, and Louisa had told her so long ago.

Louisa confided to Felicity as they were preparing to go to the church, that a new baby was on the way, and that things were going so well, she hardly even felt she was carrying it. Felicity was delighted to hear it.

"Oh, if it could only be me," she sighed. "Wouldn't it be lovely to have cousins the same age? If you are going with the lucky letter tradition, you should name him Andrew. Andrew would go so well with Adam"

"It would, but we will have to wait and see," Louisa said soberly, as she and Elizabeth helped Felicity adjust her wedding dress. It was a rich blue organdy, frosted with ruffles, and the short puffed sleeves were overlaid with small white flowers, Nan's best embroidery, and her wedding gift to her sister. Nan's needlework had always been better than Felicity's, and Nan was proud of that. "Frankly, I'm considering names like Ann or Amelia. We might not have too long a wait for you to join me on the path to motherhood, though. Ben will faint when he sees you in that dress. You are showing an unconscionable amount of bosom, Felicity Merriman. You look lovely, but it's not what I expected you to choose. Why did you choose blue anyway?"

"Because blue was the color of the gown I wore when Ben escorted me to my first ball, the year the war began. It made me think of what a happy beginning that was for us," said Felicity, smoothing the skirt.

"I remember when I asked Ben to sneak that gown out of the house, so Mother and I could finish it for you in time for the Ball. Your mother was ill that winter, too ill to do it herself, and I knew what it meant to you," Elizabeth said, smiling. "I should have realized then that you had him under your spell. No one else could have convinced Ben to go to a Ball at the Governor's mansion. All that had to be done after that was for you to grow up."

It was a lovely wedding, and the wedding party was everything Felicity could have wished for. She was happy with her new gown, but she thought that Ben looked just as fine as she did. He had worn a brand new navy blue coat over a white waistvest. Except for the coat, and his black gold-buckled shoes, he was attired in flawless white, and Felicity thought it set off his dark hair and dark eyes quite well. She was very proud of her handsome new husband.

The buffet table was covered with a damask cloth, and on it sat silver bowls filled with wonderful food, including string beans, sliced turkey, chicken salad and ham. So much good food, family and laughter filled the house that night that everyone was in high spirits.

To her surprise and joy, Ben had given her a wedding ring engraved with the words "Love is eternal" in the same script she had used to embroider the little cloth bag for his rose.

Her wedding night was equally lovely. Her mother had placed a brand-new spread on the bed, and Polly had put a bowl of spring flowers on the dresser, but it was being back in Ben's arms at last that meant the most to Felicity. She found the experience better for the waiting.

"You have given me beautiful memories this day, Benjamin Davidson," she said, resting her head against his shoulder, as they were drifting off to sleep.

"You are quite welcome, Mrs. Davidson," he murmured. He had also given her Matthew Merriman Davidson, who would be born nine months later, but at the time, they did not know that.

Authors note: I tried to get this up for a few days, but I had problems. I have eight chapters done. This will probably be 10 or 12 all together.


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

Felicity suspected she was with child two weeks after the wedding, but was even surer six weeks afterwards. Her time had not come since two weeks before the wedding, and she was starting to feel quite ill in the mornings. Her mother had been ill like that when she had been carrying Polly. Felicity remembered. She wanted to talk to someone, but she did not want to tell her mother yet, in case she was mistaken, and was coming down with something else.

Besides she was confused by her feelings. She had wanted Ben's baby for so long. She had been able to picture in her mind so clearly herself holding Ben's child as he held her. She could see them as a family, but the idea of birthing a baby, when she had to deal with it literally, frightened her. When would it be born? Where would it be born? Would it be painful? Would it be more painful than she could stand? What if she died in childbirth or the baby died? What if she died and the baby lived? Would Ben be able to manage? Would her mother help? Would he marry someone else to give the baby a mother? What would Williamsburg say when it became apparent she was carrying so soon after her wedding?

Felicity was definitely not pleased to have to be carrying a child in Williamsburg, after all of the gossip that had occurred about her and Ben. She and Ben had married as soon as possible after the engagement had finally been officially announced, and she knew the gossips of the town would be counting on their fingers trying to see if her child were legitimate. She knew now what her mother had meant. It had been so easy at the time to say she wouldn't have cared what the town had to say about her and her child, but now, somehow it did matter. It mattered very much. The thought of their prying made her uneasy.

She longed to confide in someone, but she didn't want to get her mother's hopes up, or Ben's either. Elizabeth had gone back with her family to New York. Nan had never been a close confidant, and besides, Nan had been rather depressed lately. Felicity knew her sister was happy for her, deep down, but Nan still resented on some level all the attention being paid to her older sister.

Everyone had noticed. Despite his poor dancing ability, Charles had even escorted her to a couple of dances at Wetherburn's tavern, trying to cheer her up. Mr. Wetherburn held dances once a week, charging five shillings. This was expensive entertainment for those hard times, but it did distract Nan a bit to get out of the house. Felicity thought Charles was very nice for being so considerate to her sister, when dancing was not his favorite pastime. Perhaps those reel lessons she had given him at the store had been worthwhile.

Ben had planned to go back to the plantation in June, after his family had returned to Yorktown, and he had helped Charles get the store back open. It would take a great deal of effort to make repairs, and restock it, and he wanted to help with that. He had planned on spending two months in Williamsburg and a return trip to visit the Merrimans for Christmas. But he had no idea how he was ever going to get back to the plantation if Felicity did not get well. Six weeks after the wedding she had gotten some mysterious sickness. She would be violently nauseous, and then after the nausea passed, she would be perfectly normal. What was troubling him more than anything was the fact that she was hiding this illness.

He suspected she was deliberately hiding it from her parents. It made him wonder if it was more serious than she wanted them to know. They were coping as well as could be expected with the loss of their only son, but Ben did not think they could bear the loss of another child.

Whenever he asked Felicity about how she was feeling, she blamed something she had eaten, or something she had done outdoors in the sun, but things were not normal. Felicity had never been ill as a child, not once.

Ben finally lost his temper with Felicity one morning, as he caught her staggering back from the privy. She tried never to be sick in her room, because she knew the maid who cleaned the chamber pots would notice, and the smell would just make her sick all over again.

His worry made Ben's voice sharper than it had been with her in many a day. "Lissie, you're as green as an old cheese. I cannot take this anymore. I'm going to tell your mother, and we're going to get you some help."

"Ben, please don't!" Felicity said, sitting wearily on the end of their bed. "I'm almost sure, but not really sure, and I think it's too soon to tell them."

"Tell them what?" Ben asked, exasperated.

"That I'm going to have a baby."

Ben's eyes went wide with astonishment. "Felicity, that would be wonderful! What do you mean by almost sure? When will you be certain? It's the end of May, now. Would it come by the end of the year or the start of next year? I wonder if it will be lad or lass. If it's a girl, I hope she looks like you. I can't believe I'm really going to be a father. That was fast, wasn't it?"

He grinned broadly, and Felicity almost had to laugh. Why were men so often so pleased with themselves when they proved themselves men in this way?

"I really can't think of anything else it could be and don't know why I'm so surprised. I said I wanted a baby as soon as we married," said Felicity wearily, "and I always seem to get what I want, whether it is good for me or not."

"What do you mean? Is something wrong?" Ben was frightened by her lack of enthusiasm. He knew other men in town who had lost wives in childbirth. He had seen those women being carried away by black horses with black plumes on their heads, and seen their men looking numbly after them.

The thought of losing Felicity, when he had waited so long to have her took his breath away. He scooped her up and sat down in the rocking chair next to the fireplace, holding her tightly onto his lap.

Felicity shook her head, and then laid it on his shoulder. "I don't think anything is wrong. I haven't felt anything that I haven't heard of other women feeling. I should probably ask Mother or Mrs. Deare, though, just to be sure, but everything seems quite normal. It's not that. It's just that I feel bad, putting so much of a burden on you so soon. You promised to help Charles fix the store, we need to get back to the plantation and see how the planting went, now there will be many things I won't be able to do to help, and we'll have a new baby in the house in the new year, needing attention."

Ben shook his head. "I married you expecting that we would have children some day. A man is lacking in so much when he does not have a family. I love you and I like babies. I will be doubly fond of my own. I do not see what the problem is. You're the one who was the most eager to have one, and now you decide you are worried about how we will manage? I will never understand women."

"What about what the folk here in town will say? Aren't you worried about them making sly remarks about when we made this baby?"

"I'll kill the first person who tries," Ben said calmly. "Go see Mrs. Deare, Lissie. Maybe she can ease your mind. If she tells you it is so, we can make a grand announcement to the family" And with that he kissed her, a warm kiss that gave her another worry.

She changed her clothes, putting on a cool, lemon yellow muslin gown and managed to slip out without anyone seeing her. She knocked on Mrs. Deare's door, and the old woman finally answered.

"Felicity! I'm so happy to see you! I have not seen you to speak to since the wedding, although I see everyone going in and out of your house. I was just making some tea. Come on in and join me in a cup. It's such a pleasure to me to be able to have tea again. I missed it so much during the war."

Felicity followed the old woman into the house. Her wooden tea caddy was back out on the table, brightly polished and filled with fragrant tea leaves. Felicity hadn't realized how much she had missed that smell.

Mrs. Deare put the leaves into a lovely china pot, decorated with delicately painted flowers, and poured the water carefully from the kettle. It reminded Felicity of her days at Miss Manderly's, and she got a lump in her throat. It seemed like so long ago. Mrs. Deare handed Felicity a china cup, saucer and spoon. She had hidden her silver in the well when the British came, and thus had saved it all.

She even poured like Miss Manderly, with elegant grace. Felicity accepted both milk and sugar, and a biscuit. The hot tea made her feel much better.

"What brings you to me, Felicity? Is it too dull in your house since all your company has gone away? It was fair to bursting at the seams the week of the wedding." The old woman, being a bit lonely, had watched the comings and goings at the Merriman house with interest.

"It was, but it was nice seeing Ben's family and the Coles. No, I want to ask you about something else. I think…I think…" Felicity put down her cup, and took a deep breath. "I think I'm going to have a baby!"

The old woman looked at her with a practiced eye. "I thought you looked a trifle green the last few mornings as you were rushing out to the privy. Do you get sick most mornings?"

"For the past week I have," said Felicity. "It's awful."

"The ones who get the sickest in the first three months usually have the easiest births, though," said Mrs. Deare.

"Mother was ill of a morning many a time with Polly, and having Polly nearly killed her!" Felicity cried.

"The birth was easy. Polly was two weeks early, and she was small. That helped. It was the infection your mother contracted in childbed that was so difficult," said Mrs. Deare. "I wish she had not gone into labor early. We did not have time to prepare as we should have. When did you last come at your normal time?"

"Two weeks before the wedding," Felicity said, blushing slightly.

"The wedding was the first week of April," Mrs. Deare mused. "Now it is almost the end of May. I think it's safe to say you're having a child, and it will probably be born either the last week of December or the first week of January. Are you going to be at the plantation then?"

Felicity thought hard. "We are supposed to go back next week, but we were planning on coming back to Williamsburg for Christmas"

Mrs. Deare shook her head. "You must come back sooner. You don't want to be bouncing over those rough roads and go into your labor. You're a strong girl, but don't risk it. I wouldn't risk having the baby out at the plantation, with no one to look after you but those country girls, either. They might not be able to reach you in time, over winter roads. Try to convince your husband to come back by the beginning of November at the latest, and I will see you get a well-born child."

"I want a well-born child. I wanted a baby so much, but now that one is coming, I find myself worrying over so many things!" Felicity shook her head in confusion, as Mrs. Deare poured her more tea.

"You're frightened, Felicity Merriman. It bothers you because very little has ever frightened you. But you'd be a fool if you were not. You don't know what will happen. But you must trust me, most of the time things go well."

"I don't want to die. I don't want the baby to die. I don't want the gossips of Williamsburg to watch me grow stout and start counting the months until the babe is born," Felicity said bitterly. "I just wish I could wake up with a baby in my arms, and be done with it!"

"Doesn't everyone?" Mrs. Deare laughed, amused. "But you have about seven months to wait. Let your mother and father and husband spoil you, Felicity. Stay calm and be patient, as hard as that is for you, and all will go well. It will be lovely to have a new baby in Williamsburg. There are fewer of them these days than there used to be. So many young men were lost during the war, or are not settled enough for fatherhood. Your Benjamin comported himself well."

Felicity almost choked on her biscuit. She had one more question to ask, and it was the hardest one of all. She felt herself start to blush as she spoke. "About my husband…can we still…I mean, would it be safe to continue…"

For once in her life, Felicity was completely tongue tied, but Mrs. Deare knew what she meant. "Husbands are just as important as babies, Felicity, especially new husbands. If you were frail and sickly as a rule, I would worry, but you don't look like the type to miscarry. If your husband were a brute, I would worry that he might in his violence do injury to you or the babe."

Felicity started to bristle, and Mrs. Deare held up her hand. "Don't get your red-headed temper up. It sometimes happens, but I don't see Ben Davidson as being that way. If he is careful and considerate, it should be quite awhile before you get too big to spoil his pleasure. If you want to go on giving him his way, and he wants to have it, go ahead. Now have another biscuit. Have you told him yet, or told your mother?"

Felicity tried to regain her composure. "I told him I suspected it, but I haven't said anything to Mother yet."

"Martha will be pleased. She had a hard time getting in the family way, and when she did, she was always thrilled. She would have welcomed a dozen children, but it was not to be. Perhaps you'll make up for it, seeing as how easily you got caught with this one." Mrs. Deare hesitated. "I'm sorry to hear about your brother, Felicity. Please accept my condolences. It must be hard for you parents to lose their only son. I know they still have three healthy daughters, since Nan seems to be gaining strength as she matures, but it is not the same."

"Ben doesn't care if we have a daughter or a son," Felicity said proudly. "He said if it is a girl, he hopes she looks like me."

"I do, too," Mrs. Deare said laughing, as she made more tea. "He's a pretty boy, but you are prettier. That was a kind thing for a man to say, but if it's a boy, though, I'm sure I'll still see him dancing for joy."

"That would be quite a sight," Felicity answered. "Ben is a terrible dancer. He always was."

And they both laughed over their tea at the image of that as it went through their minds. Then they turned the conversation to other things. Many of the residents of Williamsburg were moving out, many to Richmond, the new capitol. The Benjamin Powell family had been the latest. Both Felicity and Mrs. Deare felt the decline of their home town deeply.

When Felicity told Ben that night, that a child was definitely on the way, he was thrilled, but a bit concerned about whether or not he should continue making love to his bride. He did not want to harm her or the babe, but Felicity told him what Mrs. Deare had said about husbands being as important as babies, and pointed out that she had been in the family way for several weeks anyway, and they had been making love every chance they had gotten, and no harm had been done. They gave themselves to each other as always, talked in bed for a long time, about how the rest of the family would react to their good news, and then made love again. Felicity had no fear. Ben had always been a gentle and considerate lover.

To celebrate they bought a new horse that the silversmith had taken in trade and wanted to be rid of. It was a very spirited stallion that Ben thought would add wind and strength to the line of the horses he was raising on the plantation. He was considering concentrating on raising horses at the plantation in the future. They would always raise some crops, but he thought they would do well if they got into breeding horses. Many Virginia planters had success with horse farms.

That idea thrilled Felicity, who had always had a soft spot for horses. She was happy to support him and they spend many happy hours discussing their plans. Felicity named the new stallion Ambition, because she said Ben's ambitions concerning their future horse farm matched her own.

The Merrimans were depressed to think of Felicity and Ben going away. They knew Rose was overburdened taking care of the plantation house, as was Saul was taking care of the fields and horses, and that Ben needed to get back and begin managing what was now his, but they would still miss him and Felicity. The farewell dinner they planned for the night before the young couple was to leave was an elaborate one.

"You will still come home for Christmas, will you not, my dear?" Mrs. Merriman asked her daughter, as she passed the peach and blackberry pies she and Ruth had made for the occasion.

"We will be home sooner that that, I think," said Ben looking at Felicity, his brown eyes sparkling. "We need to get back as soon as the harvesting is underway."

"Need to? Why? What have you got planned for us?" Mr. Merriman asked, confused. Charles was making great strides at improving the store, and autumn was the busiest time on the plantation. There would be crops to harvest, food to be preserved, butchering to be done, and the buildings made tight for the winter. He had been thrilled just to know that his daughter and son-in-law would be able to get away from the plantation for the holiday.

"Mrs. Deare would never forgive me if I did not let her bring our first child into the world," Felicity said casually, and the table erupted with excitement.

"Oh, Lissie! A baby? How grand! When is it coming?" Mrs. Merriman cried, as Charles cuffed Ben on the shoulder and grinned, and Polly shouted with glee.

"Oh, Charles," Nan cried. "How I wish it could be us! I can't wait!" Charles blushed, and everyone laughed then turned their attention back to Ben and Felicity.

Felicity accepted her mother's hug. "It will probably be here the beginning of next year, as far as we can figure. This was the year of new beginnings, or so we said, but 1783 looks like it will be the same. I don't want to be on the road so close to my time. So we thought, if it's all right, we'd come back in the fall so that the baby could be born here."

"Of course it's all right," said an overjoyed Edward Merriman. "We would be happy to host the birth of our first grandchild. But are you sure you do not want to stay with us now? Ben could go back, and we could care for you."

"I don't need coddling, Father," Felicity assured him. "Everything is going well, and we want to spend this time together, in our own home."

The entire table toasted Ben and Felicity, and the babe to come. The other Merrimans even began to suggest baby names, and Felicity told them about the tradition in Ben's family, about choosing a lucky letter.

As they prepared to return to the plantation, Ben insisted that Felicity ride in the carriage. He did not want her doing any horseback riding in her condition. He trusted Ethan, who was driving for them, more than he trusted Felicity to take care on the road. But Ambition did not like to being tied to the back of the carriage, the way they usually did with other horses they were transporting back and forth, so Ben decided to ride him.

Just outside of town, out of the corner of his eye, Ben saw something white come sailing through the air. It hit the horse on the hip, and Ambition reared up in fright. Ben fought to control the animal and lost. He landed in the road, flat on his back, and the horse took off after the carriage. When Felicity saw the riderless horse coming up behind the carriage, she screamed, and Ethan managed to reach over as the terrified animal came alongside of them, and seize the bridle.

He stopped the carriage with difficulty, as the other horses sensed and got a bit spooked by Ambition's terror, but soon they were all at a standstill in the middle of the road. Once he had the horse firmly fastened to the wagon, Ethan assisted Felicity out of the carriage, and she did her best to calm the carriage horses while Ethan got Ambition calmed down. The horse stood next to the carriage, trembling with fear and fatigue. They could both see that there was a bloody gash on his hip.

Felicity was nearly frantic when Ethan drew her attention to the edge of the hill behind them. Ben was walking slowly toward them, limping slightly. His face was streaked with dirt and sweat, but otherwise, he seemed to be all right. Felicity burst into tears, ran up to him and threw her arms around his neck, covering his face with kisses, dirty as it was.

"Oh, Ben! Are you all right?"

"I must be insane!" he declared. "Why did I ever buy that mangy, black-hearted beast?" He shook his fist at the horse. "Damned fool monster!"

"He was hurt, so he got frightened," Felicity said, drawing back and wiping her eyes. "There's a nasty cut on him. Did you run into something?"

A bit mollified, Ben walked over and examined the horse. "I saw something come through the air behind me. It looks like someone tossed a stone. It looks bad, but it really isn't that deep. Saul should be able to treat it when we get home."

"But who would want to spook your horse?" Ethan asked, worried about his master.

"Perhaps it was an accident. Some lad with a bad aim could have been out in the woods playing with a slingshot." Ben mused. "It is a very curious thing." He sighed, and brushed some of the dust off his clothes. "At this rate, I'll wear out the back of my jacket before I ever get a chance to wear out the seat of my pants."

They tried again to tie the horse to the back of the wagon, and with so much of the energy drained out of him, they succeeded, so Ben was able to ride with his wife, who was happy to cuddle and coddle him all the way to the plantation.

When Ben and Felicity got back to the plantation, there was much to do, and they soon forgot about the horse incident. Felicity began sewing herself some gowns with high waists, putting good seams in them to allow for her last months. Her sickness passed, and being at the plantation raised her spirits. They had a fish fry, so they could get to know the families living on the neighboring plantations, all of whom were also curious about the new couple in the big house. Felicity's grandfather had been on friendly terms with all of his neighbors, and they were happy to tell Felicity and Ben stories about the old gentleman.

The men discussed farming and horses with Ben, and were pleased to learn that the young man was intelligent and knowledgeable. The women, especially old Mrs. Wentworth, who had been closest to Felicity's grandfather, spoke wistfully of how happy he would have been to know that she was having a child, to continue his legacy on the plantation. Felicity made it a point to go out to the burying ground at least once a week, to leave flowers for William, her grandfather and for the grandmother she had never known.

The July heat was beginning to wear on Felicity, though. The baby was not showing much yet, although there was a slight, rounding curve to her abdomen, but she was definitely aware of it all of the time, even if others were not able to immediately see it. Her mother came out for several weeks, with Nan and Polly, and they were impressed by all Ben had done. Felicity was proud of her handsome husband. She was also delighted to get a letter from Elizabeth, asking if Felicity's offer still stood. The Coles were definitely going back to London.

Felicity showed the letter to Ben with apprehension. She wondered if she should not have asked him first, before issuing her blanket invitation, but he assured her he did not mind at all.

"You know how hard it is for me to refuse you," he teased her. "I think it would be good for you to have company, Felicity, and Elizabeth would also be a great help to you. Rose is getting older now, and needs help managing the house, but as the baby grows, it will become harder for you to get around. I don't trust you not to over do. I'm sure Elizabeth would not mind keeping an eye on you for me during the day, when I am doing other things."

When Elizabeth arrived, Felicity wanted to whoop for joy as she had so often done on the plantation as a child. She ran down the stone steps and across the green lawn to meet the carriage Elizabeth had hired from Wythe's stables in Williamsburg, where Elizabeth had stopped on her way from New York.

"Oh, Elizabeth, I'm so happy to see you. How is Charles? And how is my father? Did you stay with them for long?"

"I stayed there for two days," Elizabeth said, as Luke and Ethan took her luggage into the house. "They are fine. Your father expected to arrive himself at week's end, but now he is not sure if he will get out at all. Charles misses Nan terribly, but he cannot leave the store, even though business is bad." She looked around. "I had to promise not to tell Nan, that, though. Charles does not want her to worry. Where is she?"

"She took Polly down to the river. She misses Charles, too, and has to keep busy to keep her mind off of him. I know this long engagement is saddening her. She and Polly are playing with the boat. Polly likes to pretend she's rowing. Oh, Elizabeth, she reminds me so much of William! It's just not the same, with him gone."

Elizabeth hugged Felicity around her waist. "You'll have a new little one, soon, or so I heard. And now that I am here, I can see for myself that it's true. Why did you not write to me?"

"It was the kind of news that I thought no letter should bear. Once I knew you were coming, I thought I'd tell you myself. Did my father spoil my surprise?" asked Felicity, leading Elizabeth toward the house.

"No, Charles did, He's thrilled about being an uncle again. They expect his sister's new baby in another month or so. Oh, Lissie, what a lovely lawn this is!" Elizabeth looked up at the house in awe.

"If you are not too tired from traveling, I could show you around."

"Please do. I heard so much about this place from you in the old days, that I feel I know it, and I'm so tired of sitting in the carriage."

Elizabeth exclaimed over the white shell paths, and the flower beds, and admired the house, and fields and outbuildings. As they walked, Felicity told Elizabeth about the plantation, and how well Ben was running it, and about their plans for the baby.

When they got back to the house, however, Mrs. Merriman was furious with Felicity. "Did you take Elizabeth out walking without even giving her a chance to change out of her traveling costume, and without as much as a bit of refreshment after her long trip? Felicity, when will you start learning to think before you act?

Both girls burst into the giggles, thinking of how often they had heard Mrs. Merriman speak in such a tone of voice, and Mrs. Merriman herself, hearing the giggles she had so often heard before had to laugh as well.

Felicity was kept busy on the plantation, too busy to worry anymore about the baby. Crops and stock were up to the master to manage, and Ben was managing well, but everything else depended on the mistress of the house. She was caring for not only her family, but the slaves as well. She had to manage the gardens, the cooks, chambermaids, and storerooms. She and Elizabeth helped put up the vegetables, fruit, figs, and made strawberry, peach and blackberry jam.

She and Ben had so much to talk about. He told her about his plans to enlarge the stables, and about his idea to put more fields in oats, and plant less wheat. He arranged for the workmen when she wanted to fix up a nursery for the baby, but they both planned out how they wanted it to look. They worked well together on the plantation, and they both knew that they had made the right decision when they had agreed to take it on. They started talking more seriously about baby names. Felicity wanted to name the baby Martha, after her mother, if it was a girl, and she wanted to name it Matthew, after Ben, if it were a boy.

"So we're going with the letter 'M' then?" he asked.

"Do you mind?"

"Not at all, but I do think the baby's second name should be Merriman. That will go well with any other name that begins with that letter, and it might help to mend your father's broken heart, if he knows the name will go on in that way."

Felicity was so touched by this, that she not only kissed him tenderly, and went to ask Nan, who had been helping supervise the kitchen help, to see to it that his favorite macaroons would be on the table for dessert that night. Nan sighed loudly, but did as her sister requested.

When her mother and the children were preparing to go home at the end of August, Felicity wished she could go, too, but there was so much left to do. They had a visit from Bryce Davidson, who brought them the news that Louisa had safely been delivered of another son. She had told Bryce to make sure to tell Felicity his name was Andrew.

Felicity, was now obviously pregnant, and began sewing for the coming baby, while Bryce went out with Ben every day to oversee the work of the plantation. Bryce especially loved working with the horses and showed no indication of being ready to leave, but Felicity did not mind having him around.

She often saw the two men deep in conversation, and wondered what they were discussing, but when she asked Ben, he gave her non-committal answers. She assumed it was just horse talk, or that they were taking this time together to reminisce about their family and childhoods. Bryce had been three years older than Ben, the brother closest to Ben in age.

He was a great help to Ben on the plantation, and Felicity was grateful for that. He was also very attentive to Elizabeth. It should not have come as such a shock when, several weeks after Bryce had arrived, Elizabeth confided to her that Bryce had asked her to marry him.

"I am going to accept," Elizabeth said. "I think it will be a very suitable arrangement. We have a lot in common. We were brought up the same way, and think alike."

"What about love?" Felicity asked in wonder.

"I love a lot of things about him. I love his humor, and his looks and his manners. I respect him, too. He's well-bought up, considerate and kind. I'm sure our feelings will grow deeper with time. Not everyone can spend years learning to love before they marry, the way you did with Ben. This match suits us, and that's all that matters."

Felicity knew that what Elizabeth was saying was true of most marriages. Suitability was what mattered most, and passion often came later, but she would never understand that, and was glad that her head and her heart had both been satisfied by her husband. "Will you be going to Yorktown for the wedding? When will it be?" Felicity asked, wondering if she should try to manage the trip in her condition.

"Actually, we thought we would marry in Williamsburg when you and Ben go back for the holidays," Elizabeth confessed. "Would you mind if we asked your parents to let us have the wedding at their house? Bryce says if they will consent, he will write to his other brothers, asking them if they would like to come for Christmas and stay until your baby is born. It would be a lovely family holiday."

"That would be perfect," Felicity exclaimed. "Now we will truly be sisters!"

When she told Ben the exciting news that night, as they were preparing for bed, she was surprised to learn that Bryce had already discussed it with him.

"Since Elizabeth was living under my roof, he thought he should ask my permission to court her," Ben admitted. "I wanted to tell you, but I was afraid you'd get ahead of yourself and congratulate them before the whole thing was arranged."

"Is it really just an arrangement?" Felicity asked, worried.

Ben shrugged. "Bryce needs a wife, and Elizabeth needs a husband. They get along well. He thinks she is beautiful, and talented and kind. He thought so when he first saw her at your parent's house. He has been thinking of her ever since, which is a good thing. He couldn't forget her, and wished only to see her again. Whether they are madly in love, I cannot say, but I think he will be a good husband, and treat her with respect and that they will be happy together."

"I suppose so. I hope Mother and Father let them marry at our house. I will enjoy seeing them wed," Felicity said, sigh settling down into their bed. "But I will miss Elizabeth so much when she moves to Yorktown. I was hoping she would come back and stay with us for awhile to help me with the house once the baby was born. She has been so happy here."

Ben cuddled her close, putting his hand on her belly to feel the baby kick. "Bryce does not want to go back to Yorktown, actually. Things have never gotten back to normal since the war. He was actually wondering if he could stay here and help me. I've had so much to do with the fields that I have not been able to concentrate on building up the stables. Saul and I really want to spend more time raising more horses. I think we could have the finest horse farm in Virginia, given a bit of time. Bryce will help us, and even take some of the horses in lieu of pay. Then he can start his own farm someday."

Lissie sat up. "Your brother wants to come and work for you, rather than keep working for Brandon?"

"Aye. There is little enough for Brandon and Brett to do right now, with things the way they are. Brett is planning on moving to Richmond to work for a lumber company. A friend of his is starting a new mill there and needs a trustworthy man to handle the office work. Brett has always had a good head for figures. Bryce thinks he could do better here. Eventually he will leave us when he gets a place of his own, but it will take awhile. What do you think, Lissie? I don't want to do it unless you approve."

"Nothing would make me happier, well, almost nothing," Felicity said, giving her husband a warm kiss.

Ben grinned. "Don't you think this is getting a little unwieldy?"

"A bit, perhaps. I know we will have to stop, probably in another month or so, but before we do, I want to be sure you've convinced our child how much you love his mother. Or hers," she amended hastily.

"That I do," said Ben, kissing her back. "But it's getting a bit awkward, having three in this bed. The baby kicks me as much as it kicks you."

"That is doubtful," said Felicity.

Mrs. Merriman was quite sure that her husband would not mind hosting another wedding in the house, and was delighted to find out that Ben's brother had decided to marry the little blond girl that had been as much of a daughter to her as her own. Nan was a bit put out that Elizabeth would be marrying before her, when she had been engaged so much longer, but as Felicity reminded her, Elizabeth and Bryce were older, after all.

"By the time we have my wedding," Nan said in a superior tone at supper the night before they were to leave to return to Williamsburg, as plans were being discussed, "Mother and Father will be experts at holding wedding parties. They will have had plenty of practice. I want my wedding to be really grand, the grandest wedding anyone ever saw."

"Wait until it's my turn," Polly said solemnly. "I will have the loveliest wedding of all. You'll see."

"You have a lot of growing to do before that happens," her mother said, glancing at her youngest.

When Mrs. Merriman left, she did not do so without many hugs and kisses. The goodbyes took so long, that Nan, impatient to be home with Charles, was in the carriage for twenty minutes before her mother joined her.

"We will see you soon," Felicity assured her. "We'll all be there as soon as we get most of the crops in, and most of the preparations done for winter, the beginning of November at the latest."

"I hope so," she said, glancing at her daughter's belly. She looked up at Ben. "You will take care of her won't you?" She then looked at Elizabeth. "Do not let Felicity do too much."

"I won't do anything you didn't do yourself, in this condition," Felicity assured her. When her mother pulled away in the carriage, though, Felicity began to cry. Ben took her in his arms at once.

"Heart's dearest! Why do you cry?

"I'm crying because it is the end of summer. Summer never used to begin until I got to the plantation and saw the river. It never ends until my family goes back to town. That always marks the end of summer for me, and I hate to see it end. This will be the first time they go without me, as well. I also miss my father. I wish he could have managed a trip down this year."

"You'll see the whole family again soon enough," said Ben. And Elizabeth agreed.

"We'll be back in Williamsburg before you know it. When we get back, Bryce and I will have a lovely wedding, and you will have a lovely baby, and summer will come again. It always does."

"Perhaps we will be back in Williamsburg when the preliminary peace articles are finally signed," Bryce added. "They are working on the treaty in Paris right now. That will be a great relief. Once those are signed, our Congress needs only to ratify the articles, and the war will be behind us forever."

"That will indeed be a great day," Elizabeth agreed, smiling at Bryce. She put her arm around Felicity and led her back to the house as Ben and Bryce went out to oversee the plans for the grain harvesting.


	7. Chapter 7

It's Hard To Refuse You

Chapter 7

Ben and Felicity arrived in Williamsburg at the beginning of November, and had a nice time visiting with Polly, Nan and Charles, and Mr. and Mrs. Merriman. They were thrilled by the news from Europe, that their beloved General, Lafayette, had become the father of a daughter in September that he had named Virginie in honor of their home, the land he had fought for.

Felicity especially enjoyed spending time with her mother. Now that she was about to become a mother herself, she appreciated her own mother more. It was harder to relate to Nan, who seemed to be jealous of all the attention that was being paid to her sister, but Felicity put that down to the fact that Charles still had not set a wedding date. He wanted to wait until business improved at the store.

They argued about it at supper one day.

"We have to wait a little longer," Charles told Nan. "My prospects are still poor. I would not want to fail you."

"There are other ways to fail a woman, Charles. What will we have next year that we do not have now? We certainly won't have more youth, or more hope, or more love," Nan said huffily.

"I want to offer you more security," Charles said firmly. "I want to be able to make my own way when I marry."

Ben could understand that well enough, but it was harder for Nan, as it had been for Felicity. She tried to commiserate with her sister later, and tell her that she understood, but Nan was not eager to listen, so Felicity let it go.

She was rather concerned however, when Nan told her privately that she felt entitled to what Felicity had. It was true that their father's apprentices had both become their betrothed while the girls were both at a young age, but to Felicity, the circumstances were both much different. She did not want to think that Nan was marrying Charles because she simply wanted to be married. He was too nice a young man to be used that way, but Nan truly seemed to think that because things had worked out so well for Felicity, she was entitled to everything Felicity had.

Bryce and Elizabeth arrived at the end of November, and seemed very happy to see everyone. They seemed much happier in general, and Felicity wondered if they had spent their time at the plantation doing anything but playing chess and getting the place settled for the winter, but decided she was the last person to worry about things like that. At least they had been chaperoned by the servants and properly engaged, which made the situation a little more respectable. Bryce had plenty of things to tell Ben about how things were going on the plantation, so it was safe to say it hadn't been all play and no work while Ben and Felicity had been gone.

Ten days before Christmas, the rest of the Davidson family arrived. Once again, the Merriman house was full to bursting, but no one minded. Everyone was just too happy to be together. Brandon and Louisa found they hardly had the chance to hold their own children, so pleased was everyone to indulge Adam and baby Andrew. Mrs. Merriman got the old Noah's Ark down for Adam to play with, and he spent hours lining up the wooden animals two by two, reminding Martha of the days past when she had watched her own small children at play.

Bryce was delighted to see his older brothers again, as was Ben, and they spent many happy hours during Christmas week in the parlor after dinner, reminiscing about their own childhood Christmases past. The three brothers who were happily settling down teased shy Brett mercilessly about how to find a bride of his own, but he took it in good stride.

Felicity was happy to have arrived back in Williamsburg without any injury to herself or the babe she was carrying. She was glad that they had been able to come so soon. She was getting so stout she could not see her feet, and the baby was kicking her so hard that she often gasped, and put her hand to her belly, causing great consternation in anyone who happened to be present. The entire family treated her like a cannon that was about to go off, but Mrs. Deare came to see her every few days, and had assured her that all was well.

Mrs. Deare had wound up assuring Ben as well. He had sought her out, anxious about his wife. He kept a constant eye on Felicity, and was distressed by the size of the growing child, compared to the size of her slender frame. Felicity seemed to be growing smaller as the baby grew larger, and he was afraid the baby would, in the end, be too big to be safely born

"The first or second week of January, I would say, probably the latter. Do not worry. The baby is fine. Everything looks just the way it should. You're going to have a beautiful baby," Mrs. Deere said. She was impressed by young Mr. Davidson's obvious love and concern for his wife. So many men did not express themselves in this way, thinking it unseemly.

The one sorrow they had was that the Coles had not come from England to attend Elizabeth's wedding. They had written, of course. They remembered Bryce well from their previous visit and were happy that Elizabeth had chosen to marry him, but they could not come. They were anxious to establish themselves in England, so that they could get out from under Lord Lacey's roof. His sister had died that summer, so he had come into his own, and was being most kind and hospitable. He had gotten Mr. Cole, who had always had a fine head for figures, a job in a friend's counting house, and things were going well for them, but they could not come.

Felicity tried to comfort Elizabeth, but she was handling things fairly well. She missed her family, but she was happy in the Americas.

"It was my choice to stay, and if I had not stayed, I would not have been able to marry Bryce, so I must be content," she told Felicity one day, as the girls were busy sewing Elizabeth's wedding dress. She had chosen a heavy white silk trimmed with cream colored lace, with a fur trimmed cape to go over it on the way to church and back. Felicity could not sit in one spot too long without her back beginning to hurt, but she wanted to help as much as she could, and she enjoyed pinning the pieces together, and seeing the sleeves, bodice and skirt of the shiny dress taking form. It was going to be very beautiful.

"Your mother is as dear to me as any mother could be," Elizabeth added, making Felicity feel very proud. "It was very kind of her to let us come here and to have the wedding party in her house."

The only thing that worried Elizabeth was that she was not bringing much of a dowry to Bryce. She had nothing but her clothes and a few articles she had been given from the Cole house, things her parents had decided not to take back with them to England.

Felicity, worried, reported this to Ben, and he took a moment when they were alone one evening, to tactfully ask his brother how he felt about Elizabeth's fears. Bryce had replied to Ben most kindly.

"It does not matter to me what she has. I would want to marry Elizabeth if she had nothing but the dress on her back. I knew the moment I saw her that I wanted her. She was sitting in this very parlor, wearing a white Swiss muslin gown, which came down off her shoulders, and had tiny pink flowers embroidered on it. Her hair was as gold as any coin, and she was smiling at me. That smile slipped into my heart. So did her voice. It was the sweetest voice I had ever heard, and she behaved so well, like a true lady. Many people had reversals of fortune during the war. There is no shame in that. Believe me, it does not matter. I want her for herself, not for what she can bring me."

When Ben reported this to his wife, Felicity sighed in relief, her last doubt gone. She had feared the marriage would only be one of convenience, but no man would remember a woman's dress that well if he had not been smitten with the woman who had worn it. This was going to be fine.

The wedding was to be held a few days before Christmas. Felicity, in a fit of stubbornness, refused to go to the church, unwilling to go out in public in her state, and subject herself to the prying eyes of the town. Ben tried to convince her to go, but she told him she would really rather stay home and help prepare for the wedding supper, and unable to refuse her as usual, and knowing well how stubborn she could really be, he made her excuses to the others, who chalked it up to pre-confinement jitters. Her mother was even relieved, since the streets were icy, and she was afraid Felicity might fall.

The wedding party had just left for the church, and Felicity was still on the porch, thinking about how nice Ben had looked. He had gone off in a black coat, gleaming white shirt and cravat, and a fine silver brocade waistcoat, which left her longing for the day when they could once again truly act as husband and wife in the privacy of their bedroom. She gave her ample midsection a pat as the wedding party drove off. As she was turning to go back into the house, Jeff Galt came past the house. He looked at her and sighed with displeasure. "If I looked as you do, Mrs. Davidson, I'd shoot myself."

"If I were as foolish as you, Mr. Galt, I'd miss." Felicity folded her arms across her ample belly, and stared him down.

He shrugged and walked away. Felicity could not imagine why Jeff was still in Williamsburg. His father had been made director of the state apothecary in 1780, and had not been in town much over the last two years.

The wedding supper was a splendid one, a preview of the Christmas dinner to come. The room was ablaze with candles trimmed with red ribbon, and decorated with holly and ivy. There was venison, turkey, and ham on the table, plus potatoes, jellies, cakes and pies. Ben, as usual, had three servings of the mince, Felicity noticed, amused. She herself did noble justice to the food, and began to regret it a bit when the weight of it settled in her stomach.

Christmas dinner, a few days later, passed more informally than usual, the chatter at the table very light-hearted, in spite of the fact that a fierce storm was raging outside. They were all quite cozy together inside. . After dinner, they retired to the parlor where the men all had a pipe and a snifter of brandy, and the ladies indulged in a glass of wine. Elizabeth decided to read aloud to them all from one of Mr. Merriman's fine volumes of Shakespeare, mischievously choosing A Midsummer Night's Dream for that stormy winter night.

She did so fine a job that they were all held spellbound and Bryce's pride in his new bride seemed never ending. Felicity had to acknowledge the skill of her friend's performance, but drowsiness was beginning to dull her senses. Luckily Ben noticed, and suggested that the two of them retire for the night.

"I must beg that you excuse us now," he said, catching her eye. "This has been a long day for Lissie, and I do not want to see her overdo."

"Of course, my dear," Mrs. Merriman said at once. "You need your rest."

Everyone else also wished Felicity and Ben a good night.

He helped her up to their room, and Felicity smiled at him gratefully. "Thank you for rescuing me. That chair was becoming most uncomfortable. My back has been bothering me. Mrs. Deare says it's normal, and comes from my carrying around this extra weight, but it is a bother."

"It will be over soon," Ben assured her.

New Year's Day came and went, however, and the family looked forward to the coming year, 1783. The baby showed no sign of making an appearance, however. Brett, and Brandon and Louisa, regretfully took their children back to Yorktown right after the first. The men had to get back to work, and Louisa felt they had stayed long enough. They would have liked to have been there when their new niece or nephew arrived, but they all knew it would be easier on the Merrimans to deal with the birth without having extra guests around.

"You will let us know, won't you?" Louisa asked as she was giving Ben a hug while the luggage was being loaded into the carriage.

"I'll write at once," he promised.

The rest of that week was a difficult one for Felicity. Besides the recurring backache she was dealing with, she was finding it hard to sleep. The baby was so heavy it made her feel like she was suffocating when she lay down. Usually the only way she could rest at all was if she laid on her side, with Ben's arms around her, one of his hands resting on her belly. Sometimes when she woke up with her back hurting, he would wake up, too and rub it for her.

On the sixth of January, she woke up with her back hurting worse than ever. She couldn't eat any breakfast at all, but in spite of the fact that she had not eaten, she began to feel nauseous.

"I think something is happening," she whispered to her mother. "I feel awful. Should we call Mrs. Deare?"

Her mother looked her over. "I think not, Lissie," she said kindly. "Even if the baby is coming, it will be hours yet. The first ones tend to take their time. Go back to bed and try to be patient. We'll know for sure soon."

Mrs. Merriman went to fetch the towels and sheets she had set aside for the delivery, just in case, once she had gotten her daughter settled back in bed. Felicity had small pains on and off all day, and was getting nervous. She never did feel like eating. Ben sat with her as much as possible, but her nervousness made him nervous. When he finally decided it was late enough for him to go to bed, he slept fitfully.

It was nearly dawn, and Felicity was dozing when a sharper pain gripped her. It felt like someone had driven a butcher knife into her groin and pulled it right up through her belly. She struggled from the bed, and when she was upright, she gasped as her water broke and began trickling down her legs. She stood in helpless confusion, as Ben woke, and sat up bed, startled.

"My God, it's the baby!" he said, staring at her clinging wet nightdress.

"It happened so quickly, I couldn't help it," Felicity said, amazed. "You must get me something so I can wipe up the floor before the water spreads to the rag rug Mother made for us."

"Never mind the rug, and never mind the floor," Ben exclaimed, thinking that she must have completely lost her mind. "I'm getting your mother and the midwife."

Felicity shook her head and began pulling off the wet nightdress. "Please, Ben, hand me another nightgown first. I can't go back to bed in a wet one."

Ben saw the logic in this, but he threw up his hands in exasperation anyway. He pulled the bureau drawer completely out in his panic. The drawer banged him in the knees, clothing scattered at his feet, and he tossed her frilly things about until he found another nightdress.

"Here!" he shouted, as she let the wet one fall to the floor at her feet and reached out to him for the clean one. "Get this on and get back in bed, before that baby falls on its head!"

"Ben, that is just not going to happen," Felicity said firmly, putting out her arms, and pulling the clean nightdress on. Another pain ripped through her as it was sliding down her misshapen body, and she could feel her belly going hard as a rock. She staggered and screamed and Ben looked horrified. As soon as the pain passed, he picked her up bodily and dumped her back on the bed.

He pulled on some clothes hastily, and ran out into the hall, but Mrs. Merriman had woken when she heard the shouting and already gotten out of bed and gotten dressed. She told Ben to go downstairs and wake Ruth. "Help her bank the fire and put water on to boil. And then go wake up Elizabeth. She can help me get things organized. Once that is done you can go get Mrs. Deare," Mrs. Merriman said, as she eased a stack of clean linens under her daughter.

"Shouldn't I wake her up first?" asked Ben in a panic. "Lissie's having the baby right now."

"No, I'm fairly sure that she is not, dear," Mrs. Merriman said kindly. "It will be probably be many hours yet."

By the time Ben got back with the midwife, the whole house was awake, up and dressed. Ben took Mrs. Deare past Bryce and Charles and Mr. Merriman, who were huddled together eating a makeshift breakfast, straight up to the bedroom.

Felicity was panting her way through a labor pain, directed by her mother when they came through the doorway. "Pant when you are having them and relax when they go. You need to save your strength for later."

"But what is going to happen next?" Felicity cried, when she could breathe normally once again.

"You're going to have a lovely baby," said Mrs. Deare firmly, as she bustled in. "Trust me. All of this will be worth it in the end."

Ben followed the old woman into the room, and stood beside the bed. The nightdress he had searched for so desperately had been drawn up, and a clean sheet spread over his wife to cover her in the room, which was cool in spite of a blazing fire in the fireplace. Felicity grabbed his hand, and when she did, he sat on the edge of the bed, trying to comfort her. As far as he was concerned, this was all his fault and he wanted to help. He watched his wife with a concerned look on his brow.

Mrs. Deare looked Lissie over, asked her and Martha a few questions, and then sat down in a rocker on the other side of the bed. To Ben's frustration she began rocking calmly as if she had not a care in the world.

"Is Felicity all right? How much longer do you think it will be? Don't you know?" he demanded.

"No one can tell you that," she replied, "but she looks like she is doing better than you are."

As the morning wore on and the pains came and went, Felicity gripped Ben's hand harder and harder until she was gripping it so tightly she almost broke it, but he refused to leave her, as Felicity did not want him to go. He grew paler and paler at the sight of her laboring, however, and Mrs. Deare finally got up and took him by the arm. "Ben Davidson, you do not look well. Go get something to eat. Don't come back until we call you. This is woman's work. We don't need you fainting while we are tending to your wife."

He started to protest, but Martha Merriman took the other arm, and they pushed him out the door, and shut it, leaving him completely at a loss. He heard Felicity whimper, and was torn with indecision.

Elizabeth came up the stairs, carrying another armful of clean sheets, and shook her head at the sight of him. "Go downstairs, Ben, or I'm going to get Charles and Bryce to come and drag you down. There's nothing you can do right now. Let Felicity and Mrs. Deare do what they have to do."

He finally went downstairs and into the dining room, where the other men looked at him with sympathy. They had been banished by their women as completely as he had. Rose and the other servants were busy following orders that were being relayed down the stairs from the birthing room, so they had just dumped some lunch on the table and left the men of the house to have at it.

"Here, Ben, have something to eat," said Mr. Merriman. He and Bryce pushed platters toward him, while Charles poured him cup of strong coffee. "Don't worry about Lissie. Mrs. Deare and Martha know what they are doing. I'm sure she and the baby are going to be fine."

Ben picked up a fork and put it blindly into what was in front of him, and just as blindingly tried to obey, but stopped when Bryce laughed. "Look at him! He's so addled, he's eating yams, and he has never been able to stand them."

"Then why did you give them to me, if you knew I disliked them?" Ben retorted, pushing that platter aside. "Wait until this happens to you. Wait until it's your turn. You're going to pay for this."

"Ah, Bryce, let the lad alone," said Mr. Merriman, lighting his pipe. "I remember the night Lissie was born. Mrs. Deare sent me away, too. My father-in-law was staying with us, and he thought the best thing for me would be a good stiff brandy. Needless to say, it was a very long night. I hate to admit it, but by the time Lissie was actually born, we were both quite intoxicated."

"You?" Ben gazed at him with surprise. "I have never known you to drink overmuch."

"My wife meant everything to me, just as my daughter means to you. The worry caused me to behave in ways I would not normally behave. But I learned my lesson. When Nan was born, it was also night time, and Grandfather and I had our brandy, but we had the sense to keep our drinks well watered."

Ben decided to stick to coffee, then and there, no matter how long the birth took, and managed to pour himself a cupful without spilling it.

In the bedchamber, Felicity was whimpering again, trying to keep silent in her agony, but as the baby began to move down, one scream after another did come. Down in the dining room, all of the men heard her, and all of them were affected by the shrieking, and glanced at each other nervously. They all let out a sigh of relief, in a few moments, when they heard the sound of a baby's loud and lusty wail.

Some time later, with the widest possible grin on her face, Mrs. Merriman appeared holding a blanket wrapped bundle. She went straight to Ben, as the other men leaped to their feet, staring as she drew open the blanket.

"It's a boy, Ben. A beautiful, perfect little boy and I've never heard such a pair of lungs in my life!" she said happily. "He was crying before he even got all the way out. Look at you son." She put the baby carefully in Ben's arms, and his jaw dropped open at the sight of the small, red face before him.

The other men sidled closer, and Mr. Merriman poked a gentle finger at the small hand of his first grandchild. The baby grabbed him by the finger, and he laughed. "He's going to be a strong one, all right. I can't decide, though, if he looks more like Ben or more like Felicity."

"Ben looked just like that when he was born," Bryce said firmly. "He was almost that long, too, if I remember rightly. This one's going to be tall like a Davidson, mark my words."

"What are you going to call him?" Charles asked, awed.

Ben looked up at Mr. and Mrs. Merriman. "Felicity and I decided that if you don't object that we want to name him Matthew Merriman Davidson. Would you mind sharing his name with me?"

Mr. Merriman's eyes misted. "I'd be honored. May I hold him? I know all about holding babies, after all."

Ben placed the baby in his grandfather's arms just as Elizabeth came into the room so happy she seemed to be floating. "Isn't he a miracle? Oh, Bryce, I can't wait to have one myself!"

Ben looked at Bryce and grinned at his brother's consternation, then looked back at his new sister-in-law. "Elizabeth? Is Felicity all right?"

"She's fine, according to Mrs. Deare. She is asking for the biggest possible breakfast, and for you, although not necessarily in that order. Go on up and see for yourself."

Ben found Mrs. Deare at the foot of the stairs in the hallway and minding his manners in spite of his eagerness to see his wife, offered to walk her home, but she shook her head. "You have given the world a very special child, Benjamin Davidson, and your place is with him, and with his mother. Run along now"

She watched in amusement as Ben took the stairs two at a time. He hurried into the bedroom. Felicity was lying on clean sheets, with a clean face, combed hair, and a fresh nightgown. "Did you see him?" she demanded. "Isn't he wonderful?"

"Aye and aye. How do you feel, though? I'm sorry it was so awful."

"Oh, that's just part of being a woman. But I'm hungry and I'm tired."

Mrs. Merriman brought Felicity her tray herself. Ben tried to thank her for all she had done, but she shook her head. "I'm very proud of you both."

Felicity began to eat, but her strength started to flag, and Mrs. Merriman took the tray away and ordered her to rest. Elizabeth brought the baby back upstairs after everyone in the house had gotten a look at him, and put him in a basket next to the bed. She left the new family alone for awhile.

When she had gone, Ben climbed carefully onto the bed beside his wife, stretched out gently on top of the covers, and put his arm around her. He pressed his lips to her brow, and said, "Thank you for the perfect son."

"Mmmmmm," murmured Felicity. "Do you know what is really perfect? It's the seventh of January, 1783."

"Aye," said Ben cautiously, not knowing what she meant.

"You escorted me to the Governor's Ball on the seventh of January. And I am even more happy and grateful to be with you today as I was that night."

Ben, on hearing those words, could not speak, but very gently kissed her mouth. When Elizabeth came back to check on them a little while later, she found Ben and Felicity both sound asleep, with their son sleeping just as soundly beside them.

Poor things, Elizabeth thought. They've had a very hard day.

Matthew was a chubby, cheerful baby and as healthy as his parents could have wished for. Felicity spent her confinement feeding him and cuddling him. She never grew bored with looking at her baby. He was growing more and more like his father every day, with his wispy black hair, and eyes which had turned as dark as coffee beans. Ben never got tired of looking at him, either, and especially liked to watch Felicity feed and bathe the baby. The little one loved water, and would kick merrily in his bath. Ben liked to hold his son and talk to him, as if the baby could understand him and he often got up at night when the baby fussed, and brought Matthew to his mother to be fed. He would even have changed his son's diapers, if the women in the house had not been so scandalized the first time he had offered. Rose had called on Miriam, one of the daughters from the plantation, to be Matthew's nursemaid, but the girl complained often of being left idle while Felcity and her husband fussed over their son themselves.

Elizabeth and Bryce went back to the plantation a week after Matthew was born. They said they wanted to spend the rest of the winter arranging the rooms they were to share in the west wing of the house, but Felicity suspected there was more to it than that. The newlyweds wanted some privacy. Elizabeth had admired Andrew, and adored Matthew. She wanted a baby of her own, and as soon as possible.

Brandon, Louisa and the boys had written as soon as they had received word of the birth of their new nephew, and were looking forward to visiting the plantation that summer, and getting to know him. Felicity couldn't wait for Louisa's boys to start spending summers at the plantation. It really did seem like a good idea for her son to get to know his cousins.

One night soon after Elizabeth and Bryce had left, Felicity was in the upstairs bedchamber feeding the baby, and Ben was sitting nearby, enjoying the sight, when he suddenly looked up puzzled.

"I smell smoke."

"Perhaps something has fallen into one of the chimneys, or the wind has picked up, and is blowing it in from somewhere outside?" Felicity asked.

"I think it is definitely coming in from outside." Ben rose and peered intently out the window. The acrid smell was getting stronger, and he hoped against hope that it was being carried to them from some distant place, but then he noticed flickering light coming from the side of the house, a bit toward the back garden. He tore out of the room, almost running into his father-in-law, who was rushing down the hall, followed by Mrs. Merriman.

"There's a fire on the side of the house!" Mr. Merriman shouted.

"I'll help Felicity and the baby downstairs," Mrs. Merriman said practically, although she was shaking with fear.

"Ring the bell in the back yard. They will hear it in the slave quarters and it will get the servants up!" Edward shouted to Ben, as he rushed down the stairs.

Flames were licking up the side of the house, from a pile of kindling that had been piled there. The remains of a torch lay on the ground. Ben, Charles and the male servants quickly put it out, as Nan, Felicity and their mother stood huddled in front of the house with the female servants. Miriam was especially terrified, and her mother had to speak sharply to her to settle her down.

The damage, luckily, was not great. Everyone was thankful that it looked as if it could easily be repaired, but the whole family went back and forth between anger and confusion once they were safely back inside discussing the matter.

Ben, his face still sooty, was mostly furious. "Someone tried to burn us out! But why?"

"Do any of us have any enemies who would hate us this much?" Felicity asked in a small voice, as she swiped at her husband's face with a damp handkerchief.

"I hope this has nothing to do with us," Ben said, looking at her meaningfully. "There are still many in town who resent me because my family's Loyalist ties kept the redcoats from firing the house during the war."

"We may never know," Mr. Merriman said slowly, "but we must keep a closer watch on the house, especially if we see anyone on the property that does not belong here.

Ben and Felicity left the Merriman house in March, so that they could be back at the plantation to oversee the spring planting. In spite of their son's birth, they had not had a happy time in Williamsburg. The fire had frightened them, and many of their old friends were gone. Betty Randolph had died in February, and her house had been sold at auction to the highest bidder. John Hornsby had bought it, but Williamsburg was still in a decline. Ben was happy to be back on the plantation.

Saul needed Ben's approval to buy some horses that were being sold off a neighbor's plantation, and Ben wanted to see them for himself. Marcus and his sons, Luke and Ethan, were going to be put in charge of the crops, so that Saul would be able to concentrate on the stables. They were also hoping that the rest of the family would be safer; in case whatever resentment that fueled the fire had anything to do with them. No one had been able to determine who had set it, or why.

When they arrived home at the plantation, Felicity had several small visits from various neighbors who wanted to see the new baby, and also to congratulate Bryce and Elizabeth on their marriage. Felicity was a fine hostess, having learned the art well from her mother, and the old plantation house became a center for friends to gather, just as it had been when her grandmother had lived there. Miriam was happy to be home, and found more to do, as Ben and Felicity kept busy around the plantation. Felicity forgot the troubles she had been through in Williamsburg and was a happy woman. Soon it would be summer, and she would have her whole family around her once more. She did not know it then, as she planned a grand party for soon after they were to arrive, that this would be the last summer her whole family would be together.


	8. Chapter 8

It's Hard To Refuse You

Chapter 8

The horses Ben and Saul chose to buy were quite beautiful and spirited. They bought another stallion and two mares. Felicity was especially drawn to the fine chestnut mare with the flashing white legs, because of her spirit. She reminded Felicity of Penny when she had first seen her. Ben planned to breed her to Ambition. The two of them were sure to produce good foals.

The horse was very independent, but the men felt she could be tamed. They named her Autonomy, simply because she had such a mind of her own. Ben found it hard to refuse Felicity anything, but he gave her strict orders not to try to ride the new mare yet.

"You just got over having Matthew," Ben said, thinking that the best part of that was that he was once again able to make love to his beautiful wife. "You have not ridden for a long time. Get used to it again gradually, with the other horses, and let this new horse get more used to us. If you try something foolish and she throws you, Matthew will be without his mother, and I would miss you as well." He drew her close, and kissed her, letting a hand wander down over her backside.

"I'm sure you would," Felicity said impishly. She looped her arms around his neck and gave him another kiss, then turned more serious. "I am going to try to get her to trust me however. I want to come out and visit her and talk to her as much as I can. I'm busy getting ready for Mother and the children's visit, but I still like looking at the horses. I've missed riding terribly."

Ben held her tightly and looked at her fondly. "Perhaps you and I could take Hobgoblin and Patriot out, after Matthew's next feeding. He usually sleeps for a good long time after he eats now, so we would have some time to spend alone."

"If it wouldn't scare the horses," Felicity said, her eyes shining bright with love and amusement, "you did say we could at one point finish what we started."

Ben looked at her puzzled, and then he remembered their earlier conversation in the woods. "You are an evil wench! The thought of that will stay with me for the rest of the day, until we can be ready to leave."

"There is nothing wrong with anticipation," Felicity said with a smile. She gave him one more kiss and flitted away to see to her son, while Ben groaned.

When they returned from their ride much later than expected that afternoon, Elizabeth shook her head at the sight of her friend, who was hurrying to feed her squalling son. "Felicity, did you take that horse under too low a branch? You have leaves in your hair! You must be more careful! After Matthew finishes nursing, you must go wash up before dinner. You might even need a bath. I'll call Miriam, so that she can sit with him while you bathe"

"Thank you," Felicity said, grinning. "I do feel like a bath today. Have the water sent up to our room while I get the baby settled. Mind you, Ben will need a bath, too, however, so we might not be down for awhile."

Elizabeth looked puzzled, but went to do her sister-in-law's bidding.

The month of April brought almost unceasing rain, and political news. In March, there had almost been a coup, due to the fact that many Continental soldiers were still owed back pay, and were asking for pensions. Some politicians were pushing for a stronger central government. The problem was that the government did not have a reliable way of raising money. They could not raise any revenue by direct taxation. Although there were still British troops in parts of New York, and much negotiating to be done, the official end of the hostilities would come, and even then the English would have more negotiating to do with France, Spain and the Dutch.

Alexander Hamilton and Robert Morris were trying to push Congress to tax imports. Hamilton and George Washington refused to support the Army in any threatened coup against the civil government. The conspiracy finally collapsed and the problems eased as much of the Army faded away, furloughed out. Only a small force remained, at West Point and scattered throughout several frontier outposts.

When May came, summer came with it. Each day seemed hotter than the previous day. In Williamsburg, the Merriman family looked forward to returning to the cooler countryside. Marcus was coming from the plantation for a short time to mind the store, so that Charles would be free to join the Merrimans for a real family reunion.

Ben and Felicity were planning a grand party for the weekend after the others arrived, and everyone was looking forward to it. Brandon, Louisa and their children, and Brett Davidson were also planning on coming.

Peace terms were still being discussed between the United States and Great Britain, and Felicity wished they would get it over with before the party, so they would have that to celebrate. General Lafayette had been asked to have a part in arranging the peace, so she was sure it would be done properly. Lafayette was still her favorite general. Ben admired Lafayette greatly, but favored George Washington.

"You are so fond of the Marquis," Ben teased her, "that I wonder if I should not be jealous."

"Well," Felicity said, her eyes sparkling mischievously, "I never will forgive Adrienne D'Ayen-Noallies for grabbing him before I had a chance to grow up."

Ben laughed and kissed his wife. "I was the one who got to watch you grow up, and it was quite entertaining to be sure."

"Do you not still find me entertaining?" Felicity asked coyly.

"Indeed, my love, I do," said Ben, giving her a longer kiss.

Felicity eyed him mischievously. "I suppose I could always make love to you but pretend you are the Marquis."

Ben looked at her shocked, and the look on his face goaded her on.

"But then," she continued, "you would probably have to pretend I am Annabelle."

Ben had to laugh at that, and swat his wife's backside. "You are an evil wench, Felicity, but at least I never have to fear boredom, being married to you."

As Charles was getting ready to go to the store the morning before Marcus was to arrive, Nan stopped him on the porch. "I must speak with you alone," she said, looking nervously up at the house. "Meet me at the bridge that goes over the canal at the site of the old Governor's palace at noontime."

Bewildered, Charles, who was expecting a busy day at the store for the first time in a long time, due to a new shipment of goods that had just arrived, agreed to meet her for a few moments. The bridge was a spot he knew well, lovely and fairly secluded, a popular spot for young couples to go courting, but he couldn't understand Nan's skittishness.

The bridge was a riot of color, with sweet shrubs, dogwoods, and daylilies making a backdrop of considerable beauty. The peacefulness of the spot was broken however, by what Nan had to tell him.

Charles informed Edward Merriman that night that he had received word of an emergency at his home in Yorktown, and begged Mr. Merriman to allow him to travel there when the family left Williamsburg, and to also allow Nan to accompany him. Charles promised that they would be staying with Brandon and Louisa in Yorktown and that they would join the rest of the family at the plantation in a few days. The strain he was under was obvious, and Mr. Merriman knew that it was a sore spot for the youth that the rest of his family had not yet met his intended, in spite of their long engagement, so he let them go.

Mr. Merriman was more anxious to get his wife out to the plantation. Martha had never quite recovered from the hardships they had encountered while under British occupation and afterwards, and especially the strain of planning Felicity and Ben's wedding, and hosting Elizabeth's wedding to Bryce under such short notice.

Her father's plantation tended to act on her like a tonic, as did the chance to spoil her only grandchild, so he was anxious to be on his way. When the driver of the carriage containing his middle daughter and her intended turned off at the road to Yorktown, He merely waved, but Martha Merriman watched until the small buggy had disappeared in the distance.

"Whatever is the matter, my dear? Why do you stare so?" asked Edward Merriman curiously.

"It was Nan who kept looking at me, so I kept looking at her," Martha replied. "I hope whatever crisis is occurring at the Prentis house is short-lived, so that Charles and Nan, Brandon and Louisa can join us soon. I do so long to see those little boys of Louisa's again."

"Not to mention our own little Matthew," Edward teased.

"Perhaps Felicity will give us another grandchild soon," Mrs. Merriman said hopefully. "Or Elizabeth and Bryce will find themselves expecting a little one. They are like my own children, too. It would be lovely to have another baby in the family."

"We shall have to wait and see," said Edward. "I think Felicity and Ben will have many children for you to dote over, considering how easily she got caught with the one."

"Edward! That's the first time in a long time that I have heard you make a risqué remark!" said his wife, shocked.

Edward merely shrugged, and Martha had to laugh at that.

Felicity had given a great deal of attention to planning the family reunion party. Foods had been planned and what had to be purchased had been. She had instructed the gardeners to make sure the outside of the plantation house had been manicured to perfection. Since the party was to be a barbecue, pits had needed to be dug for the roasting of the pig and side of beef, and a keg of ale for the men stood ready to be cooled in the creek. They had gotten plenty of lemons to make lemonade for the children and ladies, as well as some light wines. Since the party would probably go on until dark, torches had been prepared to illuminate the area Felicity and Ben had chosen for their picnic at the proper time.

When her parents arrived with Polly, Felicity was shocked at how gray her mother was getting. It startled her to realize how old her parents now seemed. She was also disturbed to hear about Nan and Charles going on to Yorktown. She had just gotten a letter the day before from Louisa and Brandon, confirming their date of arrival, and there had been nothing in it to indicate that there was anything wrong with any of them, with Mrs. Prentis, or with any of Charles' other older sisters. She longed for the end of the week, when her sister arrived with the rest of the Davidsons to hear the explanation for this unusual occurrence.

Charles and Nan's carriage arrived the day before the barbecue, about an hour before Brandon and Louisa Davidson's. The pair was looking quite subdued, and Felicity quickly handed Matthew off to Miriam, when they arrived, so she could lead them into the parlor. Felicity thought they needed refreshments and a chance to relax from their journey, and was sure they would enjoy sitting and looking at the view of the flowers and neatly clipped shrubs outside the window as their trunks were carried upstairs by servants.

Hearing that her middle daughter was back, Mrs. Merriman hurried in to see her. "Nan, my darling, what is wrong? You look positively ill," her mother said, shocked at the sight of the bedraggled pair.

"I'm not ill," Nan said, sticking out her chin in a most defiant way. "I'm married." Charles cringed, obviously awaiting his new mother-in-law's reaction, and Felicity sank down into the nearest chair, amazed.

Mrs. Merriman looked at her daughter in stunned disbelief. "How did this come about?"

"We were married at Brandon's house in Yorktown," Charles said nervously. "He and Louisa will be along shortly to help explain."

"But why did you not do us the honor of seeing you wed in a church?" Mrs. Merriman asked, anguished.

"There wasn't time," Nan said stubbornly. "We had to marry quickly, and away from Williamsburg." She paused, and then launched the cannonball of truth she'd been concealing. "We're having a baby."

"Oh, Nan!" Felicity moaned.

Her sister turned on her. "You're a fine one to talk. Everyone in town knows you and Ben were living together before you married. You got everything you wanted whenever you wanted it. You always did, but I always had to wait for years to catch up to you. I didn't want to wait any more for everything I wanted! Who are you to act like a Goody-two-faced?"

"The situation was completely different for me, with Ben! When, pray tell, Nan, was all of this happening with the two of you? At least Ben and I weren't sneaking around the house behind everyone's back, looking for quiet corners to indulge ourselves in! And we were honest about it with Mother and Father, instead of running off like cowards!" Felicity snapped back.

"Girls, stop squabbling," said Mrs.Merriman, shaking her head to clear it. "It is not becoming. Felicity, send for your father."

Felicity had been stunned by her sister's boldness, and had indeed been spoiling for a fight, but her gentler self began to assert itself at the sight of her mother's pale face. She took a deep breath, and forced herself to accept the unacceptable.

"I will fetch Father, but I beg you, Mother, to calm yourself. No great harm has been done." She looked at her sister and swallowed hard. "You're right, Nan. In many ways you are right. I am the last person who should be looking down on you." Felicity glanced back at her mother.

"Mother, can you not see that, too? Nan and Charles belong together. We were indeed a bit unfair to them. I was a noisy and demanding girl at times. I thought since I came first, I was the most important, especially after William passed on. Then I thrust Elizabeth upon you. It was not fair to these two. What is done is done, and we must believe it will come out for the best."

She turned to her sister. "You were probably right not to marry in Williamsburg. Let the neighbors there think what they will, the old cats. I doubt if many of the ones that are left there will give it much thought, though, since the fact of your long engagement is so well known, and they all have their own concerns right now."

Nan looked at her sister, and then her face softened. They fell into each others arms, leaving Charles looking even more lost before their closeness than he had been in the face of their fury.

Edward Merriman was indeed disappointed that another of his daughters had seen fit to transgress the boundaries of accepted morality, but he still loved his child, and he loved her new husband as well. It seemed that there was nothing to do but to make the best of the situation.

By the time Brandon and Louisa arrived with their boys, most of the shouting was over, to that couple's intense relief. When Charles had begged them for their help, they had felt they had to comply, but they had not known how the Merriman family would view their actions. The fact that no one was holding any part of the affair against them was a great comfort.

Louisa's older sisters had not felt the same way. They had been embarrassed and had refused to come to their baby brother's hasty wedding. Louisa and Charles had never been especially close to the older Prentis women, so it was not that severe a loss. The Merriman and Davidson families were closer to them, and enough for them. Brandon and Louisa decided to just let that family problem go for the moment. They were flattered and pleased that if the baby was a girl, Nan and Charles had decided to name it Louisa, and if it were a boy, they were going to name it after Brandon. Nan now considered the older Davidson couple her new best friends.

Felicity was not so sure about that idea, thinking it would have been more proper to honor her parents or at least Charles' but with new-found wisdom she let it go. Felicity knew in her heart it was not her decision to make, and so it was no use starting a fight. When she and Ben retired to their bedchamber that night, she had calmed down and was able to tell him honestly that she was happy that Brandon and Louisa, who had always been kind to her little sister, would be honored in such a way. Felicity also confided to her husband that she was hoping for a nephew, not a niece.

"If they name this baby Brandon, and decide to go with the tradition of your family, then perhaps they will name the next baby after you," she confided.

Ben threw up his hands. "Felicity! Let this child arrive before you start speculating on another! What is done is indeed done, and I am not going to say anything to him about it, but I am heartily disappointed in Charles. He is so mild mannered. I never thought he would do something like this."

"Nan is not mild mannered," Felicity said firmly. "She probably planned out the whole thing. Charles most likely could not refuse her, and more than you could refuse me when it was our turn."

Ben had nothing to say after that, but Felicity found a way to keep him busy without talking.

"In some things I can never refuse you, Felicity," Ben said drowsily, as they were both falling asleep.

"Thank you for that, my darling," Felicity answered just as sleepily.

After a good night's rest, and a huge breakfast everyone was in a more cheerful mood. Brett Davidson arrived that morning. He had attended Charles and Nan's wedding at his brother's home, and had been anxious to avoid any potential fall out from that event, so he had let the others go on ahead without him. He was greatly relieved when he arrived at King's Creek to find out that everyone was taking the wedding and upcoming blessed event in stride.

A studious man, he had never had his brother Brandon's confidence, Bryce's wit or Ben's charm. He was quiet and thoughtful. The Merriman family welcomed him as always, and overwhelmed by their eager acceptance of him, he just sat back to enjoy the cheerful chattering of the women and the sharp humor of the other men.

When they had all taken their places under the trees, to enjoy the sumptuous feast that had been prepared for them, Charles and Nan sat with him and questioned him at length about his new life in Richmond. He told them about the city and the mill where he was employed. Many residents of Williamsburg had moved to the new capitol and all of the adults joined in to listen when he gave them news of old neighbors.

Polly pleased to be the oldest child for once was strolling proudly around the grounds, in charge of Adam, Andrew and baby Matthew, although Miriam kept a close eye on the children from a discreet distance away. A feather tick had been spread out for the babies to crawl on, and Polly had found all sorts of things to show Adam, who was a bright and curious little boy.

After they had eaten their fill of the wonderful food, Polly brought Adam a reed and a shell of soapy water, and she taught him how to blow bubbles. Felicity watched the two of them, and smiled, remembering how she had done the same thing when she was a little girl. Then she helped herself to some more beef, and listened contentedly to Ben and Bryce telling Brandon about their plans for growing more oats and raising more horses.

Late in the afternoon, when there was a lull in the conversation, Felicity looked around and exclaimed, "Is this not a beautiful day? I do not think we have had a prettier one in weeks." Everyone agreed enthusiastically.

Mrs. Merriman sighed as she looked out over across the lawn. "I do not think I have had as nice a day since my dear father passed away."

Her husband patted her hand and then raised his tankard of ale. "To my dear father-in-law, God rest his soul, who made all of this possible!"

"Yes, a toast to dear Grandfather," Felicity seconded, raising her wine glass. They all cheered and drank enthusiastically. Those who had known the old gentleman thought of him fondly, and those who had not known him, wished that they had.

"I miss him so much," Martha Merriman confided to her eldest daughter, "and I do so long to see his dear face again. And I miss my little boy. A mother should not have to bury her child. It is not natural. I wish William were with us."

Felicity put her arm around her mother's thin waist. "You will see Grandfather again, some day, and William, too. I am sure of it. You told me that those we love never truly leave us. If you believed it them, you must go on believing it now. Do not be sad, Mother."

"I am not sad any more. Just a bit tired. It is a beautiful party, though, Felicity," Martha said, relaxing back into her chair, to watch her family gathered all around her. Daylight had flown when the ladies all said their goodnights, and went to their rooms. The men retired to the study for a brandy before bed.

Felicity nursed her son, then laid him over her shoulder and patted the small back until he gave a soft burp. Dropping a loving kiss on his silken head, she put him to bed, feeling happier than she had ever felt in her life. Calling Miriam to sit with Matthew in the nursery, she went into her bedchamber and took out a robe and nightdress.

"That," Ben said, coming up behind Felicity, as she sat at her dressing table, undoing her hair, "was a very memorable party." He caressed her shoulder, and she rubbed her cheek against his hand.

"Yes, it was wonderful," Felicity agreed, smiling up at her husband in the mirror before her. "I wish we could always be together like this."

But of course, they could not.

Author's note: I meant to be further along by now, but I have been fighting the flu. Thanks to everyone who reviewed!


	9. Chapter 9

It's Hard To Refuse You

Chapter 9

Felicity awoke to a howling that harrowed her soul. Pulling on her dressing gown, and staggering into the hall, she found her husband holding onto her father, literally holding him up. The unearthly howl was Edward Merriman. Nan and Polly were clinging to each other weeping, and Elizabeth, Charles and Bryce were standing by helplessly.

Ben glanced up at his wife, and said thickly, "Felicity, it is your mother. She passed on in her sleep."

Edward Merriman howled again in anguish, and Elizabeth rushed to hold her friend, who was so stunned she could not speak.

"But it was such a lovely party," Felicity moaned. "We were all so happy."

Louisa, who had come up behind her, also clad in a dressing gown, had heard Ben's fateful words. She put her arms around Elizabeth and Felicity. "That will comfort us all someday. Your mother was happy before she went to be with your dear brother and grandparents."

The rest of the day, and the next, went by in a blur. Before she knew what she was about, Felicity found herself at the burying ground in the valley behind the house. Ben had sent servants to clean it up, to trim the grass around the gravestones, and to toss away the branches that had fallen down in the small space. The brush along the path had been cut back, so that when they followed Martha Merriman's coffin to her last resting place, they had a clear path.

Felicity looked anywhere except at that coffin. She saw the three small markers that bore the names of the three sons that had come and gone before her mother's birth. Not one stone had a date of death more than a month past the date of birth. Felicity realized dully that if any of those boys had lived, her mother would never have inherited the plantation. Where would they all be now, if that had happened?

She saw her grandparent's graves out of the corner of her eye. She had forgotten her grandmother's name had been Mercy. The date of death on that stone was the same date that would soon be carved as the date of birth on her mother's stone. How could someone named Mercy have been so unlucky? Her grandmother had lost three sons, and then lost her life giving birth to her only living child. Had her mother ever thought about the fact that she had been the one her mother had died of?

Her grandfather had carved the words "Loving Wife, Gentle Mother, Our Heart's Desire" on his wife's stone. Had he ever thought about the way his wife had died? If he had, had he ever been bitter that Martha had been the one his wife had died of? Surely not, for Martha Merriman had been the pride of his life.

Next to Mercy's stone was the fine, tall, matching stone that marked her grandfather's grave. Her mother was probably with him now, telling him all about their doings. Felicity wondered idly what her grandfather would think of them. She raised tearstained eyes toward her husband, whose hand rested ever so lightly on her back. Grandfather had thought Ben a traitor to the king, but in the end, he had become more reconciled to him. Surely Grandfather had been looking down on her happiness with joy.

She glanced at her sister. Nan was white-faced and weeping. After they had found Martha dead, she had gotten hysterical, crying and vomiting by turns. Charles had carried her to the room they shared, and stayed with her for hours. Nan was blaming herself for making Martha Merriman so heartsick she had gone on to her final reward. Felicity knew that was not true, but when she had tried to reach out to her sister, Nan had refused to listen, seeking Polly's company over Felicity's. Polly, standing numbly at Nan's side, was clutching a bouquet of rapidly wilting flowers. She had always been the most congenial of the Merriman girls.

Felicity hoped in time that she and Nan could draw close once more, but she feared that without her mother's gentle influence, they would eventually be sisters in name only.

Felicity knew that Charles loved her sister, and that her mother had known that as well. Felicity knew her mother would have welcomed Nan's coming child with all her heart. But now she would never see her grandchild, unless it was from above. The baby was due in the beginning of December.

Next to her grandfather's grave was the smaller one that bore the name of William Merriman. Below his date of birth and date of death were the words, "Beloved Son" and Felicity's eyes swam with tears when she saw those words. Again, if William had lived, so much in their lives would be different, but it was no use worrying about that now.

She glanced over at Miriam. She was holding Matthew, who was sleeping with his head on the loyal nursemaid's shoulder. How had her mother and father buried their child without burying their hearts with him? How had her grandparents buried three sons so soon after birth, and still managed to go on? If Felicity had lost her newborn child, she was quite sure it would have devastated her.

Felicity knew that Louisa and Brandon were somewhere behind her, along with Elizabeth and Ben's other brothers, but she could not sense their presence. She thought of how her mother had scolded her for walking Elizabeth all around the plantation the day Elizabeth had arrived. She thought of how they had all laughed. She wondered if she would ever laugh again as she had on that day.

Her wandering mind snapped back to the present. The Reverend had stopped speaking. The plantation's strongest Negroes were taking hold of the ropes, and when Edward Merriman slowly nodded to them, they walked the coffin over to the grave and lowered it. Edward began to weep once more. Felicity had never seen her father weep until the morning she had wakened to find her mother dead and her world topsy-turvy. It hurt to see him weeping now, but Felicity could not cry. She had wept herself dry during the long last night her mother's body had rested in the house they had both loved.

After the funeral luncheon, after the neighbors had offered their last condolences, and eaten the last of the roast beef and ham, and had drunk a last glass of cool water, or chilled wine to fortify them for their journey home, Felicity and Ben spoke to Mr. Merriman.

"You may stay with us, now Father, if you wish," Felicity said.

He blinked. "I would like that. I would like to be close to your mother. We were so lucky. We had such a wonderful life together."

Charles looked over at Nan. The time had come for hard decisions. "That might be best, Mr. Merriman. Nan and I are planning on closing the store and moving to Richmond. We would not want to leave you alone in the Williamsburg house."

Felicity turned on her sister. "You have agreed to this?"

Nan stuck out her chin. "Yes. Williamsburg is finished, Felicity. We have been talking to Brett. He would be willing to let us stay in his townhouse while we find a new place for Charles to open a store. Everyone is moving out of Williamsburg. You know it."

Ben sighed. "Williamsburg is faltering. I know someday it will rise again, just as we knew it before the war, but I do not know when that will be."

"Not in our lifetime," Charles said firmly. "I will keep the store open until after Nan has the baby, and is well enough to travel, but then we will be moving."

He did not tell Ben and Felicity what he really thought, that he was afraid of Williamsburg's decline. He did not think he would be able to continue to provide for his family there. He had discussed coming back to the plantation, but Nan had been against that idea.

"There is only room for one mistress at the plantation, and that is Felicity," she had said firmly. "Elizabeth and Bryce may not mind being the poor relations, but I will not be."

Charles could see her point. He loved being a shopkeeper, and he had not minded helping out at the plantation during the war, but he was not a farmer, and he did not want his children to be farmers. The plantation was a lovely place to visit, but the work was too hard, too dependant on the weather, and other things one could not control. There was too much forest, where a child might get lost, and the river that grew so muddy in the spring, where a child might drown. He was a city boy, and would always be a city boy. And he knew that the latest grave in the valley would always cause his wife to reproach herself. He wanted to spare her that.

The summer passed slowly. Nan and Charles went back to town, and Edward Merriman stayed with Ben and Felicity. He liked going about with Ben and Bryce, watching the horses in the pastures. The conversion of the plantation to a horse farm was coming along nicely. Saul was especially pleased with that change. Felicity thought it was only because horses were his passion, but she soon learned differently. She spoke to him one day when she was visiting the stables, and he was honest with her.

"If we go on as a stable," he said, "that means more pasture, and fewer crops. We won't need as many field hands. That's less colored to be bought and sold like those horses there."

"Why, Saul," said Felicity, "I have never heard you talk about things like that. Have we not always treated you well?"

"Yes'm," Saul said. "Your grandfather was a good master. He never whipped a slave, and he tried to keep families together. He promised me when I jumped the broom with my old woman, that he would never sell her, nor none of my children. And he kept his promise. Me and my old woman was together until she went to glory, and I won't forget that. Your Benjamin, he's a good master, too, but he's still a master. You don't know what it's like Miss Felicity, until you been bought or sold."

"I think Ben does in a way," countered Felicity. "When he was Father's apprentice, he couldn't do as he wished. That gives him a bit of perspective, don't you think?"

The old man sighed. "Yes'm. A bit." He hesitated, and then continued. "You got to watch your father, Miss Felicity. He loved your mama like there was none other in the world like her. What he had to stand, she gave him strength to stand. Without her, he's lost. You got to keep him busy, and make sure he knows he's still got family."

"I am trying," Felicity said, and she sighed as well.

What really kept Edward going was not the plantation itself. It was little Matthew, and his wish to see Nan's child born. He was looking forward to going back to Williamsburg in the fall, after the harvest, to be with his daughter at her labor. He knew his wife would have insisted they go, and he was going to be there, no matter what. Felicity and Ben agreed to take him.

To their great surprise, Elizabeth and Bryce announced that they were having a child sometime around the end of January, and that cheered everyone up. Elizabeth had been afraid that she would never have a child, and now that one was on the way, she was thrilled.

As Ben and Felicity curled up together in their bed that night, they discussed the coming new arrival. They were both thrilled for Elizabeth and Bryce.

"Another winter baby," Ben said with a smile, kissing the top of his wife's head, as she rested it on his shoulder. "Charles and Nan will have their little one around the first of December. We have our Matthew's first birthday in the beginning of January, and Elizabeth and Bryce will have their new child around the end of January. We will have a lot to celebrate each year. It was not like that in my family. We were all spread out, and not just separated by the years. Brandon was born in May, Bryce was born in August, Brett was born in November, and I was born in March. We were not all having our birthdays in a bunch."

"I liked the fact that your birthday was in March," Felicity said. "Even though you were older than I was, the fact that our birthdays were so close together made it less than it seemed. You had just turned fifteen when I turned ten. That was the first year we were together when we saw our birthdays come."

"You were a very precocious ten, though," Ben teased her.

"Mmmm, wasn't I though?" Felicity said, snuggling closer to her husband's side. "I thought I knew everything."

"You mean you actually did not?" Ben teased again.

"I knew what mattered. I knew I believed in you." Felicity then wistfully wondered when they would be having another baby. Matthew was already eight months old and crawling everywhere. It would not be long before he was walking.

Ben grinned. "I am trying, you know." Then he said seriously, "When it is ready to happen, it will happen. Isn't that what I told you the last time you complained about this sort of thing? Enjoy Matt. When we have two, we will probably be so busy that we won't even have time for each other."

"We will always have time for each other," Felicity assured him.

On September 3rd, 1783, the Revolutionary war officially ended with the Treaty of Paris. It would not be ratified until January 14, 1784, but the details were all in place. France, Spain and the Dutch had separate agreements. Everyone in the Merriman and Davidson families was surprised that the lands of Florida were ceded to Spain, but very few people thought that land was worth much anyway. Too much of it was swampy, and they had terrible storms along the coasts every year. They couldn't imagine Florida ever being worth anything.

The next great surprise was that Felicity and Ben found they were indeed having another baby. The baby would come in March, sometime around Ben's birthday.

"There goes your idea of spreading out birthdays," Felicity told him, but no matter what he had jokingly said about being too busy to raise another child, he was actually thrilled. Mr. Merriman was thrilled as well, and more cheerful than he had been in a long time.

The family decided to go to Williamsburg to be with Nan when her baby came, and to stay there until after Elizabeth's baby was born. They all felt she would get better care in town. Many people had moved away, but not Mrs. Deare, and she was the most experienced midwife any of them knew. Ben worried about being away from the plantation for so long, and told Felicity flat out that he would have to be traveling back and forth quite a bit, but she was too happy about the coming baby to worry about it.

Nan's child was due sometime the first week of December, and since most first babies usually came late, Ben and Felicity had planned on arriving at the end of that week, and staying at least through Christmas. Nan, who had not been feeling well since her mother's death, and wanted as few guests under her feet as possible, had been pleased with that idea, and even more pleased that Felicity had sent Rose to Williamsburg to help her sister prepare for the holidays. Edward Merriman and Polly had gone with her. He said he wanted to visit some friends and see how the store was doing, and Polly promised to see to her father's needs.

The preparations went awry, however, when the baby decided she had a mind of her own, thank you very much, and arrived the second week of November. When they got the word, Ben, Felicity, Elizabeth and Bryce packed as quickly as they could and went into town. Mr. Merriman met them at the door, looking like his old self.

"It is a beautiful girl," he told them. "She looks just like your mother, Felicity. Of course Nan always looked the most like your mother. You favored me. They named her Louisa, just as they had promised. Brandon and Louisa wanted to come and see her, but Brandon has some kind of business deal going on that is quite complicated, so they will not be able to come until after Christmas."

"How is Nan?" Felicity asked Charles.

"She had a rough time of it, and she is glad it is over," he said. "It was a long and complicated birth. I felt awful for her. Mrs. Deare said it is going to take her a long time to get her strength back."

Felicity privately was not surprised. Nan had been a sickly child, who had been able to recognize the apothecary's step on the stairs, as she had heard him coming up to her room so often. She had always been the weakest one of the Merriman girls. Felicity had always been robust, and Polly had an inner strength that had seen her through everything from her difficult birth to the illness that had taken her brother, but Nan had never had that kind of strength.

After their cloaks had been hung up, and their things taken to their rooms, they got to see Nan and the baby. Nan had obviously lost a lot of blood. The room had been scrubbed to a fare thee well, but the coppery tang of blood could still be smelled beneath the masking odor of the lye soap. Nan's hair, in two brown braids, fell limply across the white pillow. The shadows under her eyes were a dark purple, and there was a pinched look around her nose. Felicity was shocked to see how waxy and yellow her skin was.

The baby was beautiful, though, glowing with health, her pink cheeks round and full and as she drew her small hand to her rosebud lips, she glanced around with eyes that were clear, and long-lashed. She had taken all of the mother's strength, and Felicity swallowed hard before speaking to her sister.

"Oh, Nan, she is so lovely."

Nan smiled crookedly. "She is, isn't she? She is going to be a feisty little thing, Felicity, like you were, I fear." She shut her eyes tiredly. "How are you feeling, Elizabeth? It won't be long now, will it?

"About six weeks or so, maybe a bit more." Elizabeth was also disturbed by the way Nan looked. Her only experience with childbirth had been the happy day when Matthew had been born. Felicity had labored hard, but she had come through it as well as could be expected, and been able to eat a hearty meal an hour after the baby had been born. Nan looked like she had not even tried to eat since little Louisa's birth.

Ben said cautiously, "It is too bad Brandon and Louisa won't be able to see her for a few weeks. I am sure Louisa is thrilled to have a namesake as lovely as this one."

Charles sat down beside his wife's bed, and lifted his daughter out of her cradle. He had obviously been holding the baby when Nan could not. He looked completely comfortable with her in his arms. "We decided to call this one Lou," said Charles, "to cut down on the confusion. My sister never had a nickname, so it would be hard for her to get used to one now. The baby's whole name will be Louisa Martha Prentis. She is too little yet for such a long name, but she will grow into it. Your father is awfully pleased we included your mother's name."

"Mother," said Nan weakly. "I miss her. She always took such good care of me, and I never appreciated it."

"She did not have to be told we were grateful for her. She just knew. And never fear, Nan. She is looking down on you," said Felicity firmly. "She is with us still, and she will watch over your baby like an angel."

Polly brought in some broth that Rose had made, and Charles told her he would try to get Nan to eat it. The rest of them left so Nan could concentrate on getting some nourishment and rest. When they got to the bottom of the stairs, Polly turned to the others. "Come into the dining room, all of you. Rose has supper ready, and will be disappointed if no one eats it."

They all sat at the familiar dining room table, and let themselves be served, but after the servants were gone, Felicity turned to her sister. "Polly, Nan does not look well to me. What happened?"

"She was in labor for over forty eight hours. Mrs. Deare thought she was going to lose Nan and the baby, too. I was so frightened. Mrs. Deare and Rose would not let me in the room, but they kept calling for more sheets and towels. There was so much blood."

Edward Merriman spoke up. "Your mother had a hard birth with you, child, and she lived on for a long time."

"That was different, Father," said Felicity. "Mother had childbed fever, after Polly was born. Nan has no fever. Her face is as pale as the sheets she is lying on."

"I hope my baby comes more quickly than Nan's," Elizabeth said in a small voice.

"Everyone is different," Felicity assured her. "You probably won't be like me, and you probably won't be like Nan. You are an entirely different woman. But we can go see Mrs. Deare tomorrow, if you like, and see how she thinks things are going."

"That is a good idea," said Bryce hastily, putting his arm around his wife. "That should set your mind at ease."

They ate the rest of their meal in silence, and each retired to think their own thoughts, and dream their own dreams.


	10. Chapter 10

It's Hard To Refuse You

Chapter Ten

Felicity and Elizabeth went to see Mrs. Deare the next morning. The old woman was glad to see them. As she greeted them at the door, she said with a grin, "If it were not for your family, and the colored families in town, I would have no work at all. There are few babies being born in Williamsburg these days."

"A lot of our friends have moved on for good," Felicity said with a sigh. "Even Nan and Charles are thinking of moving to Richmond."

"Nan will not be going anywhere for a long time," said Mrs. Deare, after she had taken their cloaks, and ushered them into her parlor. She began to prepare them tea, and Felicity took comfort from the ritual of it. The scent of the tea leaves and the gurgle of hot water going into the pot were comforting sounds.

"Tell us the truth. What went wrong?" Elizabeth asked when they all had their cups.

Adding sugar to her own cup, Mrs. Deare sighed. "Nan had been sickly since she came back from the plantation. I think depression over Martha's death was at the root of it. She did not sleep well, and didn't eat well. Then the baby took a long time coming, and there was a bad tear. Nan lost a lot of blood. She had a hard time getting the cord out, too. It tore inside."

She took a sip of her tea, and grimacing, adding some cream. "If Nan has another baby, it will be the death of her. I told her that, and Charles, too. Charles is a good lad. He took it well. Nan did not. That is adding to her depression now. Plus she should not be nursing the child herself. She needs a wet nurse. The baby is taking all of her strength."

Elizabeth shuddered, but Felicity was more practical. "Do you know where we can get one?" Felicity asked.

"I did not when little Lou came, but I do now. I delivered a big, healthy black boy to Jolly, the laundress at Campbell's tavern, the night before last. I'm sure you could hire her. When times got bad in town, and travelers grew scarce, her husband was sold. He is working at the livery now. They are both taking all the odd jobs they can get, trying to earn the money to buy their freedom. Shall I send word over to Jolly, asking if she is interested?"

"Yes, do. I will speak to Charles about it as soon as he gets home from the store tonight," Felicity declared. "I am sure he will listen. Not hiring a wet nurse for an ailing woman is nonsense. He loves Nan and he loves the baby. I am sure he will do what is best for them both."

Elizabeth's teacup rattled against the saucer as she set it down on the table. "What can we do to avoid the kind of problems Nan had?" she asked anxiously.

"You both look healthy enough. I do not think you have to worry, but after Felicity and I finish our tea, I will have a look and a listen at both of you," Mrs. Deare promised. She then turned the conversation to other things, and the three women wound up reminiscing about Martha Merriman. It was quite comforting to think of Martha as she had once been…a young wife and mother in a thriving Williamsburg.

When Elizabeth and Felicity finally left Mrs. Deare's they were both feeling much better for themselves, but heartily sorry for Nan. They stopped beside the Merriman house, halfway between the house and the stable, to discuss what they would have mortified to have anyone overhear them discussing.

"Poor Nan," said Elizabeth. "I hope to have many, many children. I would be heartbroken if I could only have one."

"Poor Charles!" Felicity retorted. "The physical side of their relationship was always the most important to them. Thank goodness this child lived. The baby might be their only shared bond now, if they cannot share those intimate relations that so bond a husband and wife."

"Felicity, you can be so blunt at times!" Elizabeth exclaimed, pulling her cloak more tightly around her.

"When have you known me to be otherwise?" asked her friend with a small smile.

Ben had been delighted that morning to hear that the two women were going to consult Mrs. Deare. He had been as shocked as anyone by Nan's travail. As far as he knew, Elizabeth and Felicity were both in good health, but it would do no harm for the midwife to make sure of it. He did not want Elizabeth's baby coming early, as Nan's had done, and he certainly didn't want Felicity to spend her final months under a cloud of fear.

After breakfast, he had lingered in the dining room over several cups of coffee, while the two women had gone up to help Nan eat her breakfast, and change into a fresh nightgown. It took the two of them to change the sheets because Nan was too weak to move much, and the girls had volunteered, since the servants had so much to do with the house filled with guests.

It was quite a bit later when they came down and said goodbye. He offered to walk with them to Mrs. Deare's house, but they assured him they could manage such a short distance without his assistance.

After the girls had been gone awhile, he decided to write a long letter to Brandon and Louisa. He missed his brother, the guardian of his childhood years, and his brother's wife and children, and wished they could be closer. Ben then decided, when that was done, to go out to the stables. The stable hands also had an extra workload, and he decided to see if perhaps he could be of use there. When he walked into the stable, he was startled not to see Penny in her stall. Felicity had insisted on bringing the aging horse along to Williamsburg, since Penny needed more attention in her old age than Felicity wanted to leave to Saul, who had so many other horses to care for.

Walking closer to the stall, he was sick at heart to see the horse lying motionless on her side in the hay. She was obviously dead. Felicity's fears had been well-founded. As he stepped closer, though, he was puzzled to see an empty feed sack and a length of narrow rope lying on the ground in front of the horse trough, and what looked like a large stick inside it. When he bent closer, the stick moved, and Ben saw a bright white mouth, rimmed by enormous fangs, coming toward him. He jerked back so fast that he fell onto his back, swearing loudly.

Rolling as fast as he could until he hit the wall, he heard a splash come from the horse trough. Breathing hard, he propped himself up against the wall. There was a shovel hanging from a peg above him, and as he rose slowly he pulled it down. Walking carefully over to the trough, he slammed the blade down into the water, which churned for a moment, and then grew dark, but still.

Trembling, he backed away. Outside, Felicity and Elizabeth had heard his outburst and been surprised. Ben very seldom swore.

"Ben? Ben! Are you there? What is wrong?" When he heard his wife's voice coming from the stable door, he threw down the shovel, and hurried to block her way.

"Felicity, get back! Do not come in here! Elizabeth, stay away!"

"But what is the matter?" Felicity tried to push past him, but he held her tightly. He could feel his child moving vigorously within her as he pressed his arm into her belly. Elizabeth, knowing at once from Ben's face that something was seriously wrong, helped in spite of her bulk by quickly catching hold of Felicity's arm.

Once Felicity was standing still just outside the door, Ben raised a gentle hand to his wife's cheek. "Dearest love…it is Penny. She…she has died."

Felicity swayed, and then buried her face in her husband's shirtfront. "Oh, my poor Penny! My poor girl! Her gallant heart gave out at last!"

Ben held Felicity tightly. "It is worse than that, my love. Someone put a water moccasin into the horse trough. I suspect it bit Penny, and it nearly bit me. I think I killed it, but I do not want you going in there just yet. Those snakes have jaws than can flex and bite for an hour after they are dead."

Elizabeth shook her head. "Ben, that is ridiculous. Those snakes are not active when it is this cold out!"

Ben nodded grimly. "That is why it had to have been put there." He remembered the empty feed sack. "Someone must have taken the lethargic snake from its den, and carried it here in a sack. The sack is on the floor next to the horse trough. I am guessing it warmed when it got into the stable, woke up when they dumped it into the water, and woke up in a very foul temper."

"Someone is persecuting me!" Felicity wailed, tears streaming down her face. "How could anyone kill my beloved Penny?"

"Aye," said Bryce, after Elizabeth and Felicity had fetched him and Mr. Merriman from the house. Bryce had left his wife trying to comfort her sorrowing friend, while he came to help his brother assess the situation. "There is a special place in hell for anyone who would do this to a defenseless animal."

The horse had definitely stuck her nose into the water and been bitten. The puncture marks on her face from the huge snake's fangs were deep and clear. The end must have come quickly once the poison had entered her body.

"I fear that the horse was not the real target," Ben said, looking at this brother. "I think whoever did this expected one of us to lean over that trough, and expected the snake to strike before we could get away. I only just managed it. It was a very close thing."

"But who do you think the target was? It could have been any of us!" exclaimed Edward Merriman.

"No," said Ben. "It could not have been you, Mr. Merriman, or Charles, or Nan, or any of your servants. I think someone has a grudge against Felicity or against me. These attacks only occur when Felicity and I are here. No one bothers the family when we are gone."

"Do you think it still has to do with the British protecting this house during the war?" Bryce asked. He had heard that story from his brother several times over the past year.

"I wish I knew," Ben said.

Felicity was distracted from her sorrow a little bit over the next few days, by Charles, who agreed to hire the wet nurse, so Nan could get her strength back. Felicity kept busy by taking care of her sister, and being invigorated by their quarrels, which were just like old times.

Nan had been furious when her baby was first taken to the wet nurse, and Felicity was only too happy to play the villain to protect Charles from having to be in that role. He did his part by taking turns with Miriam carrying little Louisa back and forth down the street to Jolly's cabin every four hours. The maid would have been happy to do it, and indeed had expected her mistress to order her to, but Charles insisted on doing all he could for his daughter himself.

He was comforted by the wet nurse, a large-boned light-skinned black woman, who was very grateful to have the chance to nurse the Prentis baby along with her own.

"Bless you, Master Charles," Jolly had said the first time he had come. "I needs to make some money, and I have no other way to do it, laid up like I am. All I got left is what it takes to feed a hungry child. When my man and I are free, we will remember you and your Missus always. I be saying my prayers for her to get well for you."

For Charles, the woman's gratitude almost made up for his wife's anger, which she expressed to her sister more often than to him. "How dare you!" said Nan with more force than she had said anything in a week the first time Felicity handed the baby out the bedchamber door to Charles. "How dare you take my baby away from me!"

"You would be no good to your daughter dead," Felicity said calmly, "and you are not getting well as you should. You need your strength if you are ever going to be able to mother her as she deserves. You do not usually have this hard of a time thinking of yourself, Sister dear. Why this sudden nobility now?"

"You are evil, Felicity! How dare you insult me when I am so beset with troubles?"

"You have a beautiful baby, and a husband who adores you and your child. You have every chance of recovering your health if you rest and eat properly. What trouble do you refer to?" Felicity said calmly, arranging the medicine bottles on Nan's nightstand.

"I am no longer a woman! I cannot even feed my own child, and if I am to avoid having another child, I will never again be able to embrace my husband with the fullness of my love! How long will he adore me when I cannot see to his needs as a man?" Nan wailed.

"I think he will remain more of a man than you expect," Felicity answered. "Any man can be a father, but it takes someone special to be the kind of father Charles seems determined to be. You underestimate him, I think. Now, I am going to fetch your tray, and you are going to eat it, if you ever want to mother your babe in any way. I will feed it to you myself, every bite, if I have to."

"I will hate you forever," Nan vowed.

"Oh, not forever," Felicity answered. "Probably not that long."

Nan was well enough at Christmas, to come down to Christmas dinner. Ben and Charles hooked their hands together to make a seat to carry her down the stairs. She was also able to sit up in an armchair by the fire in the parlor, and chat with Louisa and Brandon, who had come to visit. They adored the baby, and consoled Nan about having to use a wet nurse.

"In Richmond most of the more well-to-do women hire a wet nurse," Louisa confided in Nan, "rather than take care of the feeding business themselves."

Nan looked down at little Lou in her arms, and sighed. "It was taking a lot out of me. I admit that now, but I feel so inadequate sometimes!"

"You have to do what has to be done, for your sake, and for your child's sake," Louisa reassured her.

Brandon and Louisa had brought their godchild a silver cup with the name Louisa and the year 1783 engraved on it. Everyone exclaimed over how beautiful the workmanship was, and looked forward to the New Year, when Elizabeth and Felicity would be adding to the family. Louisa wished she and Brandon could stay in Williamsburg to see the new arrivals, but they had to be back in Yorktown by the beginning of January. Brandon could not leave his business longer than that.

Mr. Merriman wished they could stay longer as well. He was hurting during this first Christmas season without his wife, and having so much company distracted him. He was proud of Felicity for making sure all of his favorite foods, the ones Martha used to make him every Christmas, were on the table, and that the house was decorated as always.

When Edward got too depressed, he liked to play with little Matthew or Louisa's boys, or hold little Lou for awhile. He was looking anxiously toward the birth of Elizabeth's baby, and of his new grandchild. It was comforting to see life going on, despite his loss.

The day after Christmas, Ben and Bryce made a quick trip back to the plantation to see how things were going there. They stayed a week, but were afraid to stay longer, in case Elizabeth's baby came early. They need not have feared. The baby had been due at the end of the month, and indeed arrived on the last day of January. The labor went well, indeed so well that Elizabeth, who was in the parlor when she went into labor, barely had time to get upstairs and get settled in before her daughter was born.

Mrs. Deare was scandalized. "That was just like one of the darkies!" she said, as she cleaned up the baby, to hand her Elizabeth. "Of course, this one is a bit small, for all that she came when she was expected."

"I hope I'm like one of the darkies this time," Felicity said, peering over the blanket at the little one. "Oh, Elizabeth! She's lovely. Little Lou will have a playmate!"

"Not if Nan and Charles move to Richmond," a tired but happy Elizabeth reminded her friend gently. "We won't see them as often, if they are further away."

"I forgot about that," Felicity admitted. "But Nan is still not well enough to travel, so let's enjoy the girls while we can." She rose from her friend's beside, and went to fetch the new father.

Bryce and Elizabeth decided to name the baby "Ann Elizabeth" after her mother, and in a small way after the aunt the baby would probably never see. Elizabeth refused to name the baby Annabelle, but she knew it would comfort her mother and father, so far across the sea, if she at least used part of her sister's name.

Elizabeth had no trouble feeding her daughter, and offered to take care of little Lou as well, so they did not have to keep walking the baby back and forth to the tavern. Charles gave Jolly a generous bonus, though, for all she had done.

"Without you I would have probably lost either my wife, or my child," he told her, the last time he went to her cabin behind the tavern. "How can I ever thank you?"

"The Lord is good," Jolly said simply, cuddling her own child. Then she hesitated a moment, and asked, "When are Master Benjamin and Miss Felicity goin' back to the plantation?"

"Not until after Felicity has her baby in March, and is well enough again to travel," Charles told her. "Why do you ask?"

"They need to get back as quick as they can. There's devilment awork in this town," Jolly said. "The colored folks hears things that other folks don't. I know Master Benjamin ain't said nothing to no one in town about that old snake he found in his barn, but it didn't get there by itself."

"Do you know who put it there?" Charles asked, looking at her keenly.

"I has some suspicions, but I can't say. You know how it is, Master Charles."

"No, I do not know. If someone is trying to harm my brother-in-law or my sister-in-law, I would like to know who it is."

Jolly looked frightened. "I talk too much."

She would say nothing more. Frustrated, Charles repeated the conversation to Ben when he got home. Ben shrugged.

"I would not expect her to get involved. She is a good darkie, but she is probably afraid. If she and her husband are trying to earn their freedom, they have to be careful. Anger the right person, and she could probably get sold right out of town. Campbell's hard up for cash right now, or he wouldn't have sold her husband. He was wonderful with the horses when guests came to the tavern." Ben thought for a moment. "At least we know now that someone is specifically targeting either me or Lissie. That is what I thought, but at least now I know for sure, and I can keep an eye out."

"You were doing that anyway," Charles pointed out.

"Yes, but not having to worry about the rest of you helps a bit." Ben decided not to tell Felicity what the other woman had said. It wouldn't help and it might hurt. He didn't want Felicity getting too upset now that it was almost her time. But he tried to keep her in the house as much as possible, and when he went back to the plantation the first week of February, he did not stay as long as he would have under other circumstances. He made sure the field hands knew what was expected of them as far as the spring planting went. He checked with Saul to see how the mares that were with foal were doing, and then headed back to Williamsburg by the end of the week. Once the planting actually started, he and Bryce were going to take turns staying in town.

Elizabeth was determined to stay in town through March, so she could be there when Felicity's baby was born, but she was hoping to be well enough by then to return to the plantation with Bryce and Anne soon after.

With Nan on the mend, and Elizabeth's baby well born, there was less to worry about in the Williamsburg house. Everyone in the family was anxious for the newest Davidson to arrive. Felicity tried to keep busy sewing new clothes for Matthew to wear in the spring, but as she neared her time, it got harder for her to sew. She couldn't sit still long enough to get much done, and she didn't have enough lap left to spread out any fabric. She was so longing for it to be over.


	11. Chapter 11

It's Hard To Refuse You

Chapter Eleven

Little Ann was six weeks old when her cousin arrived. Felicity gave birth to a daughter with a minimum of fuss a week after Ben's birthday in March.

"I am sorry your birthday gift arrived late," Felicity told her husband mischievously; when he was at last able to hold his newest child.

"Good things take time to prepare," he said with a grin, looking at his wife as he comfortably held their newest child. "What shall we name her?"

"I would like to honor grandfather," Felicity said, "But this is obviously not the right time to do it. I think he would have liked it if we had named a daughter after Grandmother, though. What about calling this one Mercy Merriman Davidson?"

Ben thought about it for a moment. "I like it. It is as perfect as she is, and of course it makes good use of our lucky letter."

Little Mercy was a perfect baby. She had dark blue eyes, very round fat cheeks, and strawberry blonde hair. They watched her, wondering if the baby blue would eventually go dark, like Ben's eyes, but it remained a dark blue. Matthew liked to stand by her cradle and watch her sleep. As small as he was, he was aware enough to be quiet, so they often let him do so. He was just as fascinated by this small person as anyone else in the house. Mr. Merriman also liked to sit beside the new arrival, thinking of how lovely she was, and how much Martha would have enjoyed a granddaughter named after her mother. Felicity thanked God daily for her two healthy youngsters.

As much as the three women sharing the house loved their new young ones, having three babies in the house was a challenge, however. Miriam was running around day and night. Nan's Louisa had begun to sleep through the night, but now was apt to wake whenever Ann or Mercy roused the household with their cries to be fed, and Nan began to get cross, as she was also a light sleeper. Elizabeth sat with Felicity one day, both young women holding their new daughters.

"As soon as I can, I would like to move back to the plantation," Elizabeth told her friend one afternoon, when for just a few moments, the house was silent. "It's hard on Ben and Bryce to travel back and forth to get the spring planting done the way they want it, and Bryce will not move back permanently until I do."

"Are you well enough to go back?" Felicity asked with concern.

"I think I will give it another two weeks, to be sure. I enjoy spending time with you and Mercy, and want to make sure I am up to the journey, but it's no use tarrying too long. I'll have Rose with me, and even though she is getting on in years, she can handle helping to oversee the plantation house and little Ann with me. I need to be at home. I love Williamsburg, but it just is not home anymore. It hurts me to see the shuttered shops, and empty houses, and there are so many faces that I used to watch for in this town that I will never see again."

"I understand," said Felicity quietly. Williamsburg didn't seem so much like home to her anymore either.

The silence was broken by little Lou, whose waking wail echoing down the hall woke the other babies. Elizabeth smiled slightly and shrugged. "It must have been her turn," Elizabeth sighed, and Felicity smiled back.

Felicity missed Elizabeth dreadfully when her friend had gone, but she was eager to be back at home herself. She was getting along better with Nan, now that they both had daughters to fuss over and compare, but she knew that Nan's thoughts no longer dwelt on Williamsburg. Nan was just looking forward to the day when she and Charles could move to Richmond, and they could not do that until Felicity was back on her feet at King's Creek.

Charles had made several trips to Richmond, to work on his plans for the new store. He was very enthusiastic about it. Brett was helping him all he could. Charles thought that the best time to go would be in the fall, before the winter weather had set in. Nan would be full strength by then, and Ben and Felicity would be gone. The Williamsburg house was not worth much, because of the decline of the town, but since they would be able to stay with Brett in his townhouse at first, Charles and Nan would be able to put all of their resources into getting established. They had already begun selling some of the household goods that were no longer being used, and every time Ben or Charles went to King's Creek, they moved a few more of the things they had been given by Mr. Merriman. Polly was busy setting aside the things that Nan didn't want, but she did. She called them her hope chest, to everyone's amusement. October looked like a reasonable time for Charles and Nan to actually pull out of the declining town.

"I want to have a farewell party, before we go," said Nan. "I want to invite Brandon and Louisa, and I hope that Bryce and Elizabeth will be able to come back for it. And you and Ben, of course."

"If you are going to continue to sell off furniture and other things, or start taking them to Brett's," Felicity said cautiously, "how will you be able to host a party here?"

"We can have it at one of the taverns," Nan told her sister. "There are still a few open. Travelers still stop here, on their way to other places. They just don't stop and stay anymore. Will you come? It would mean so much to me if you and Ben and father were here to see us off."

"You are not going that far away," Felicity pointed out.

"No, but it is far enough," Nan answered cryptically.

"Will you come if Ben and I have another barbecue at the plantation this summer?" Felicity asked gently. She knew how the last barbecue and Martha Merriman's death were mixed up in Nan's mind.

"Yes," said Nan thoughtfully. "I think I need to. Actually, I would like that. I have to go back before I go on. I need to close that chapter of my life."

"Not for forever, Nan," said Felicity. "We hope to see you at the plantation often. It will always be part of your legacy, too. Mother would have wanted it that way."

"Thank you," Nan replied. "That means a lot to me."

Felicity, Ben and Edward Merriman left for the plantation at the end of May. They had a joyful reunion with Elizabeth and Bryce, and Charles came with Nan and baby Lou for a barbecue in July. This family reunion was becoming a tradition that Felicity treasured, even though it was overshadowed a bit by Charles and Nan's constant talk with Brett Davidson of the plans to move to Richmond, and by Edward Merriman's daily trips to the burying ground. He liked to spend an hour or so a day, talking to his wife as he cleared away brush and other debris from the plots in the small cemetery. Felicity cherished her time with her father, because she knew he was growing old quickly without her mother.

The entire family was gratified, however, by the continued conversion of the plantation into a horse farm. The Davidson stables were becoming famous. Their horses were known as the finest in Virginia, an area known for fast horses, and both buyers and sellers were coming from as far as Charleston, where they knew all about good horses, to do business with Ben and Bryce Davidson. Inside both of their twelve stall horse barns, and the miles of fences, were enough beautiful horses to keep Felicity delighted.

In September, Ben was invited by a prominent visiting Charleston horse breeder named McIntosh to return with him for a visit to his plantation and to attend some races in Charleston. The prosperous planter cared more for his horses than his fields, and was intrigued by the lively young couple from Virginia who shared his passion for animals.

He had come looking for horses, and found both horses, and the Merriman family, having their annual family picnic. They had made him welcome, and their closeness, their obvious concern for each other had actually impressed him as much as their horses.

He had lavished praise on their barbecue beef and pork, which fell apart at the touch of a fork. The potato salad was a perfect mixture of sweet and tart goodness. He assured them easily, that it was the best potato salad he had ever had. The freshness of the fish was heaven. The pies were perfection. He was impressed by the food, the company, and by Ben's horses in equal measure.

They were equally impressed with him. Felicity nicknamed him Sandy, a name he accepted with good humor. He was a big, jolly man with sandy colored hair, and a complexion to match. His face was covered in freckles, and he teased Felicity about not being worthy of her red hair, since she now had very few of them. After they had all praised the food, and eaten their fill of it, they talked horses nonstop until Elizabeth was bored to tears and retired to bed early, complaining of headache.

When Mr. McIntosh urged Ben to let him return the hospitality, Ben was not sure if he should go on such a long trip at such a busy time of the year, but Felicity urged him to go, and to remember every detail so he could tell her all about Charleston when he returned home.

"I will miss you, but Bryce can take care of things here, and you will probably meet many important people that we can do business with," she said as she kissed him goodbye

When Ben arrived in South Carolina, he was much impressed by the thriving city where the planter kept a fine house, and by a visit they made to the breeder's plantation in the Low Country. You'd have never known they had so recently concluded a war. Unlike Williamsburg, Charleston's prominence had skyrocketed after the war.

Ben watched with interest as they drove past marshes filled with birds and animals he'd never seen before, trying to decide how he would describe an alligator to his inquisitive wife. He saw Negroes harvesting the rice fields, and was fascinated by the process. Ben's host explained how the seed was planted in April, and how trunk gates were opened for the spout flow several times before the rice was ready to harvest.

Horsemen came from Virginia and Tennessee to South Carolina to buy and sell, to win rich purses, and set their horses on fast tracks. Plans were already underway to build a huge four mile track with a clubhouse. Mr. McIntosh showed Ben some of the gentlemen's clubs around town, but Ben didn't care much for gambling, and only drank socially, so he did not enjoy that much of that part of the trip. He only saw McIntosh's wife, Mary, in the evenings, but he was impressed by their brood of six, and the way she shared her husband's love of horses. She was a short, plump woman, lovely for her age, with large, wide, deep-set blue eyes, and exquisite shoulders, which she often showed off to their best advantage in gowns that dipped low on her arms.

Ben tried his best to remember what each of her dresses looked like, so he could describe them to Elizabeth, who was fond of fashion, and would much rather hear about what the ladies were wearing in Charleston than she would like to hear about which horses ran best on a mud track, but he was not sure he would be able to do either the horses or the gowns justice.

The children were all well behaved whenever Ben saw them, which was not often, as children did not often get to listen in on adult conversation in Charleston. They dressed in clean, crisp frocks, and all had their father's sandy hair, but the brilliant blue eyes of their mother. Baby Claire was his favorite. He had no qualms about holding her, She reminded him of Polly, when Polly had been that age, and she was quite enthralled by her father's new friend, craning her small head to look up at Ben with her quizzical blue eyes whenever she managed to gain a place on his lap.

"You have a delightful family. My wife just had our second in March," he said wistfully to Mary McIntosh one evening after supper. "I look forward to catching up to you soon. I've always wanted a large family."

"You must come again, and bring your family, Mr. Davidson," the gentle woman replied. "South Carolina's hospitality is already legendary!"

Ben laughed. "And you must come to King's Creek with your family sometime. My Felicity would love to have a new friend who is as fond of horses and children as she is."

"Perhaps I'll bring her when I come back in the spring," Mr. McIntosh said, as he thoughtfully lit his pipe. "And you could come back with us after that for a visit." He turned to his wife, grinning broadly. "I do think you'd like Felicity Davidson. She's a real spark."

"Husband! Mind your manners!" Mrs. McIntosh blushed.

Ben laughed. "Your husband says what he thinks about all things. I took no disrespect, and my wife would be greatly amused by such an assessment of her. She tends to speak her own mind as well, so be forewarned. I'm sure she would love to come for a visit. We will have to see when it gets closer, but I think that would be a good idea."

"Who manages your plantation when you are gone?" Mrs. McIntosh asked.

"One of my older brothers and I are partners. He married my wife's best friend, and we took over the plantation from my wife's family when her only brother died. It originally belonged to my wife's grandfather. He was a Loyalist, but a good man. He only had the one daughter, my wife's mother. We lost her last summer, and I miss her greatly. She was a fine woman."

"You have other brothers then? I noticed you said one of them was at the plantation with you," said Mrs. McIntosh with interest.

"Yes, I have a brother in Yorktown, who has his own business, and a brother in Richmond who works for a large firm. He's helping out right now by arranging a move for the husband of my wife's younger sister. She and her husband had a shop in Williamsburg, but since the capitol moved to Richmond, Williamsburg is failing."

"Goodness, what a large family! And you all seem so close, even though you are not all living together!" Mrs. McIntosh exclaimed.

"They're quite a jolly crowd," Mr. McIntosh said. "I miss that. My brother and sister both died soon after they were born. I'm grateful for my healthy youngsters." He looked at his wife fondly. "And my wife lost two brothers in the war. Did your wife's brother die in the war?"

"Of illness, not of wounds," Ben said sadly. "He was too young to fight, but not too young to die."

"Thank God it ended when it did," said Mr. McIntosh. "I say, did you see what Ben Franklin is up to now? He just wrote a pamphlet about the Red Indians. He calls it his remarks concerning the savage in North America. Very interesting."

"He is a man with many talents," Ben said simply, swirling the after-dinner brandy in his glass. The aroma was warm and soothing, even to someone who was not a huge fan of brandy.

When he returned to King's Cross, Felicity put little Mercy into his arms, as they sat and talked about his visit to Charleston. Bryce was very interested in the Charleston racing circuit, and about all of the contacts Ben had made for them. He was sure that the foals they expected to be born in the spring would find good homes and make them a lot of money. Elizabeth was intrigued by Ben's descriptions of the McIntosh family's homes, and their children, and was grateful to Ben for being considerate enough to try to remember what the Charleston ladies were wearing these days. Mr. Merriman looked wistful when Ben described Mrs. McIntosh, and the many humorous interactions between them. Ben's stories about Mrs. McIntosh reminded him of his late wife. Felicity drank in every word Ben had to say on every subject. He made everyone laugh when he described how a floating log he had noticed in one of the marshes had turned out to be an alligator that Ben insisted had been at least eight feet long.

Brett told Ben all of the news of the plantation, and Ben was delighted to see how well little Matthew was walking now. Miriam had a hard time keeping up with the children, and they debated about whether or not they needed another nursemaid. Rose was jealous of any strange Negroes, however, so they would have to be careful when looking for another servant.

Ben was happy to be home, and the others were happy to have him back safely.

They began to plan for their trip back to Williamsburg for Nan and Charles' goodbye party. They were leaving soon for Richmond, and Nan was having a large gathering. Louisa and Brandon would be coming, and so would Brett, who was going to drive one of the wagons back to Richmond with the Prentiss family's household goods. It was an exciting time, but tinged with sadness.

Harvest time on the plantation was easier now that they had less fields of grain, and more pastureland, but they had expanded their gardens, so they would have more food when horse breeders and buyers came to visit. Felicity and Elizabeth supervised the food as it was being put up for the winter, and checked supplies, while the men supervised the repair of fences and buildings.

The whole family was delighted when Nan wrote to tell them that Charles had somewhat reconciled to his other sisters, and that they would be coming with their families to see him off to Richmond.

Felicity knew that her sister and brother-in-law were right in wanting to leave Williamsburg, but it hurt her to see the decline of the town. It had been such a thriving vibrant place during her childhood, and now it was almost a ghost town. She looked up at Ben as they drove toward the house she had once called home.

"Do you think it will ever come back? Will Williamsburg ever again look the way we remember it?"

"I hope so," he said seriously. "It had such a special place in the history of this new nation of ours. I hope someday that it can be remembered for what it was, exactly as it was."

"I doubt it," said Bryce with a sigh. He also remembered the town fondly, and felt sorrow at its decline. "People forget. Now that the capital has been moved to Richmond, Williamsburg is fading and dying, and I fear the memory of what it stood for will be lost forever."

Elizabeth disagreed. "I think Ben is right. It was a special place, and momentous things happened here. Some day I think people will remember the way it used to be, and they will find a way to let future generations see what we saw."

"I hope so," said Felicity. "For there is so much here that holds my heart."

Felicity was equally distressed by the emptiness of the Merriman house when she saw it. Nan had sold so many of the precious things that the Merriman's had collected from all over the world…paintings, art objects, and furnishings. Many of the books, linens china and glassware had already gone to Richmond to grace Nan's new home. A few things that Polly had asked for, keepsakes that were dear to her heart had been packed up to go out to King's Creek, where Polly planned to live permanently with her father, but the house just didn't look the same anymore than Williamsburg looked the same, and Felicity was shaken to see what had been her entire world disappearing.

Felicity knew that Nan had a right to these things. When Ben and Felicity had accepted the plantation, they have given up their rights to the store and house in Williamsburg to Charles and Nan. She knew her home was now with Ben, and Bryce and Elizabeth, but it was still so hard to accept! Her head understood perfectly, but her heart was having a difficult time with this stripping of her past.

She watched her father anxiously, fearing that he too would be grieving for what he has lost, but he seemed to take it all in stride. He saw nothing but Nan and Charles, and baby Lou, and suddenly, Felicity, looking at her father, holding Nan's only child, understood.

The house is only a house to him now, she thought to herself. It was a home when mother was here, but now that she is gone, the house doesn't matter so much anymore. Family is what matters, and we are family, no matter where we are.

Once she had thought this out, she made up her mind to mend her fences with Nan once more. She didn't want her sister going to Richmond without knowing that Nan also understood that family was forever. When Mr. Merriman turned toward Felicity, with baby Lou in his arms, Felicity took the baby from him gladly, and went to kiss her sister, holding the child in her arms. Nan, Felicity suddenly realized, had taken little Mercy from Miriam, and was holding her just as tightly, her cheek resting against the baby's soft wispy hair.

When the two sisters stood together, holding each other's children, they didn't even have to think about it. They moved into each other's arms, and embraced, as each small girl looked with interest into the face of her cousin.


	12. Chapter 12

It's Hard to Refuse You

Chapter 12

Author's note: Thanks to all for their patience with me during a very difficult year. There will be one more chapter after this one. By the way, Kentucky did not finally become a state until 1792.

Felicity went to the tavern early, with Nan, Polly and Elizabeth, to make sure everything was ready for the going away party. She wore a light blue moiré that was cut quite low to show off her long neck and white shoulders. Nan wore a new dress, too, wild rose in color, with a wide, fashionable skirt. Elizabeth was dressed more conservatively in a heavy white silk, trimmed with bands of ruby red to give it a bit of color. Polly was wearing green, a color Felicity did not care for on her youngest sister. It made her look sallow, but Polly had never been one for fashion. She was a dear girl, and Felicity loved her, for herself, and for the loving care her younger sister gave her father, but Polly had never been a forceful personality in the family. She was their house mouse, the one they all depended on, but tended to take for granted. Mr. Merriman himself was coming with the other men in the family, who had promised to be along shortly.

The musicians were tuning up in the hallway when the women arrived. Nan and Felicity had hired a very popular Williamsburg trio and Nan was eager to discuss with them how many reels and round dances she wanted interspersed between the more formal dances. Felicity recognized the fiddler. His name was Jake, and he was the husband of Jolly, the laundress that Felicity had convinced Charles to hire as a wet nurse when Nan had been so ill.

She went over and asked him how Jolly was doing, and he was touched that she remembered him. He assured her that his wife was doing well, and that they had saved up almost enough money to leave Williamsburg. They were thinking of going north, to one of the great cities there…possibly Boston, or New York, where freed slaves could find paid work. He was hoping he would even be able to learn to read and write.

Satisfied that everything was going as planned, Nan came to stand beside her sister. Although she was younger, Nan now looked older than Felicity. The last few years had taken a greater toll on Nan. Her eyes were nearly always hard now. Her lips were nearly always taut, and her once willowy figure had grown more solid. Felicity hoped that her sister would find happiness in Richmond, but she knew that she herself would miss Charles and Nan and little Lou terribly.

Felicity put her arm around Nan. "I hope," she said sincerely, "that you will be settled in well enough by Christmas that you will be able to come to the plantation for a visit."

"I do, too," said Nan, a rare, small smile breaking out on her face. "I know this is for the best, but I will miss you all."

"The McIntoshes will be there," Felicity said.

"Your new best friends," Nan teased her. "You like Samuel and Mary very much, do you not?"

"I like them all," Felicity said firmly. "I just wish Sandy were not so determined to follow tradition and divide the property between the two eldest boys."

"John and Thomas are lovely young boys," Nan replies, a bit surprised.

"Yes, they are," Felicity admitted, "but the youngest one, Connor, is the best with horses."

"Lissy," said Nan, making her sister smile now, at the use of the old nickname, "Connor is but seven years of age!"

"None the less, I can see it. He loves horses as much as life. The other two are not so good with animals, fine boys though they are. They will inherit their father's property, though, one the horse farm and one the town property. What will become of Connor?"

"Worry about it when he gets past ten, like his brothers," Nan said dryly.

"He's just my favorite," Felicity confessed. "I remember how horse mad I was when I was that age. Claire is Ben's favorite. He has such a soft spot for little girls. Remember when he used to play with Polly when she was at that age? She took to him like a bee to honey."

"I remember," Nan said softly. "Mother used to say what a wonderful father he would make, and he is."

"Your Charles is a wonderful father, as well," said Felicity. "I hope Mother can see us now, and see how well the children are doing."

"I think," said Nan, "that she can. I hope that she can."

The men arrived shortly afterwards, and soon after that the few remaining neighbors came. Felicity greeted everyone as cheerfully as she could, answering questions about her children, and plantation life.

Felicity tried to enjoy Nan's party. She really did. The food was good. The music was bright and cheerful. The company was congenial. For the most part Polly stayed by her father's side, as usual. Felicity, however, saw an odd desperation in the party. All of these people who might never see each other again…so many of them planning, like her sister and Charles, to leave the now derelict town of Williamsburg. So many familiar faces were already gone. There was an ominous feel to the night that nagged at her, in spite of the fine weather, unusually fine for the autumn night. No one else seemed to notice it, though. Louisa and Brandon were sharing a glass of punch. Charles and Brett were discussing a few last minute moving plans. Polly continued to keep an eye on Mr. Merriman, who seemed happy to have her bringing him food and drinks, as he sat in a corner of the room, watching the party.

Felicity thought a bit about all the children, asleep at the Merriman house, with Rose and Miriam watching over them carefully. They hadn't enough beds and cribs anymore, so they had turned the floor of the now empty dining room into a huge bed, padding it with many quilts and down comforters, in lieu of a nursery.

Charles and Nan were dancing, as were Elizabeth and Bryce, when Ben looked down at her, amused.

"May I have this dance, Madam?"

"Are you sure that is truly your desire, dear sir? Dancing has never been one of your strong suits."

"Yet I have never failed to rise to the occasion, providing I had the proper partner," he teased her.

They danced, and for awhile the nagging feeling of unease left Felicity. She was always happiest in her husband's arms. After their dance, she was eyeing the cake, which looked delectable with its fluffy white frosting, when Ben took his leave of her. A gentleman from Charleston was staying at the tavern, and Ben was anxious to find out if he knew Samuel and Mary McIntosh. He was hoping the traveler would take a message to them about their plans to visit the plantation for the holidays. He was concerned about what the weather would be like at that time of the year, and had suggestions about the best way to travel.

Without Ben at her side, the room suddenly seemed a bit stuffy, and Felicity headed for the wide front porch for a breath of fresh air. She looked up at the stars, and thought about how much things had changed since she had started growing up in Virginia.

She heard the rattle of a set of wheels, and wondered who was coming to the party late. She had thought that everyone who had been invited had already arrived. The conveyance that pulled up outside of the tavern was not a carriage, however. It was a large wagon, similar to the one that Charles was planning on using to move to Richmond, similar to the ones that Felicity and Ben had used to move things to the plantation after Mrs. Merriman had died.

To Felicity's surprise, Jeff Galt was driving, and he was alone. He was not dressed as she was used to seeing him, in an elegant waistcoat and breeches. He was wearing rough, practical clothing.

He tipped his hat to her as he got down from the seat and walked toward her, and she couldn't help but smile. The gesture was so reminiscent of years gone by. It reminded her of the young man who had followed her so hopefully with his eyes, smiling every time he saw her. She suddenly regretted all of the tension that had developed between them. They had both been young, young and stubborn back then. She wondered if she could possibly put those bad memories to rest at last. On this night, when Nan was preparing to leave her, when the town of Williamsburg that had been so much a part of her life was nothing more than a memory, she suddenly wished that more of her memories could be happy ones, with the more difficult days departing, like waking from a bad dream.

Felicity was happy now, for the most part, and she certainly didn't wish Jeff any unhappiness anymore. If she could let Nan go, and the town, surely they could let go of their animosity.

"My dear Miss Felicity," he drawled.

"Mrs. Davidson, don't you remember?" she teased him, ignoring the sharp, twisted frown that crossed his face. "Whatever are you doing with that contraption? It's not at all your usual style. Your father always had such elegant carriages. Do you remember the one he bought the year my brother William was born? It was such a fine, big one and so beautiful. The body was painted lemon yellow. I had never seen one like it."

His face cleared. "Yes, I remember that coach...odd that you should remember. It was such a long time ago." He came and stood beside her, and she tilted her head back to see his face as he spoke.

"My father was doing so well with the shop then, as was yours. Mother was so proud of my father, of me, of the life we'd made for ourselves. I remember her bringing me to see your new brother, after your mother's confinement ended. We had tea and cakes. The cakes had crystals of sugar on top. They were easily the best cakes I ever ate."

He paused, then continued. "I was fascinated by you. You had that impossibly red hair, and a temper to match. You raced me to the end of the garden, and very nearly won. Your mother was horrified to see you come back in with your hat askew and your stockings falling down. My mother only laughed, and spoke of your spirit."

"I didn't want to be a gentlewoman. It took me years to gain the patience my mother thought I ought to have," Felicity answered. She sighed. "We share a lot of memories, Jeff. I wish you would give me the chance to be your friend, again, as we used to be as children. No doubt we'll continue to see each other again from time to time, and I do not see the point of us having such a strained relationship after all we've both been through."

He looked up at the tavern. They could hear the music and see the lights. "I hear Nan is going to Richmond with Charles."

"Yes, they are going to leave in a day or two. They should have already gone by now. It's getting late in the year for traveling, but she wanted us all here to see her off. This one last party means to world to her."

"I should have already left myself, but I was waiting for something else," Jeff said, looking at her with an expression in his eyes that made no sense to her.

"Are you leaving, too, Jeff?" Felicity was surprised in a way, but not overly so. Everyone who possibly could was leaving Williamsburg.

"Yes, I'm going through the Gap. That's why I came here tonight."

"The Cumberland Gap? But Jeff, that is so dangerous!"

The Cumberland Gap was the passage used to get to the Kentucky territory. Few settlers had gone there before the 1750's, because it was too hard to bring wagons over the Appalachian Mountains. Explorers who had gone before that time had not even found any Indians. Tribes to the north of the territory and to the south had fought many bloody wars over that land, over the right to use it as a hunting ground. Discovering the Cumberland Gap passage had made things slightly easier. The great explorer, Daniel Boone, had led some of the first settlers through the Gap.

During the war, the Shawnees north of the Ohio River had supported the British. One of the last great battles of the war, the Battle of Blue Licks, had been fought there. After the war, the largest town in the territory, Lexington, had been named after the battle in Massachusetts made so famous by the war.

There were more settlements now, and some farmers who had struck out for the new land were having success growing hemp and tobacco. Ben had told her that the land being called Kentucky had a great potential for horse farms in the future, since there were many areas that had good grass for pastures. There was a strain of grass there, almost bluish in color, which was soft and tender. Felicity had heard the year before, in 1784, that a constitutional convention had been held in Danville to discuss possible statehood for the territory. It seemed certain, that before too many more years passed, that Kentucky would eventually be a separate state from Virginia.

"I suppose now is the time to go, if you are interested in settling in that area," Felicity admitted. "You'll get the best claim if you go now, before it gets too built up, but it is still a wilderness compared to what you are used to. You've never been a country boy."

"I need to go now, while it is hard to get to, and hard to travel," Jeff said solemnly. "I want to disappear, and that is the easiest place to do it. My life was ruined when I lost you, Felicity."

She rolled her eyes. "Oh, Jeff, do not say that! Your life has gone on, as mine has. You don't need to go into the wilderness alone to lose your memories of me. If you are determined to go, then can we not part as friends?"

"I can't part from you, Felicity. I love you and only you. I'll never want anyone else. I am taking you with me."

"Jeff, please," Felicity started to say indignantly, but then she saw him drawing two pistols from under his coat. They were fine flintlocks. Her heart stopped when she saw them.

"Get into the wagon, Felicity," Jeff said in a calm voice. "If I can not have you, I will shoot you, and then myself. I can't live another day without you. This has gone on long enough."

"I can't leave my children, Jeff! Are you totally mad?"

"You can have more." He waved the gun, and then used the barrel of one pistol to push her toward the wagon. Felicity's mind whirled. She had no doubt that he would kill her if she didn't do as she was told. Death would be preferable to a life without Ben, Matthew, and Mercy, but as long as she had life, she had hope.

She took a tentative step, murmuring as she did so, "My husband will never let me go. He will find me, no matter where you go, no matter how long it takes."

"If Davidson ever comes within twenty paces of me again, he will die," Jeff said firmly. "He was lucky enough to survive being thrown by that damned horse, and he was lucky enough to avoid the snake, but he will not be able to dodge a bullet. I am an excellent shot."

Felicity looked up, horrified. "YOU tried to kill Ben?"

Jeff shrugged. "I had no choice. I tried to drive him away, first by ruining his reputation, and then by ruining his business, but neither course of action worked. I had no other choice but to make an attempt on his life. If I had succeeded, I would have been able to woo you back with tender words. Now I have to use force. It was not my first choice."

"If Ben had died, I would have mourned him for the rest of my life! I would never have forgotten him, and turned to you!" Felicity spoke with authority, but Jeff only shrugged again.

"We will never know now. But let us not tarry. We will have endless nights in our new homestead to thrash out the problem." He pushed her again with the gray metal barrel of the gun, and Felicity took one more tentative step.

"Felicity? Felicity! What are you doing?"

Felicity looked back at the tavern, and saw Polly skimming down the steps toward her.

"Go back into the tavern, Polly," Jeff said through clenched teeth. "Felicity and I just have some business to discuss. It's not your business, so keep your mouth shut and all will be well."

Polly looked at the pistols with wide eyes. "No! Leave my sister alone!" She balled her small hands up into fists and opened her mouth to scream, but Jeff was too quick for her. He swung his arm, striking her across the jaw with the butt of one pistol. Polly sank to the ground, a heap of green ribbons and fluttering petticoats. Felicity moaned.

"How could you! How could you do that?" She hissed, as Jeff forced her to the wagon, and, still clutching the pistol, pushed her by the elbow so that she was able to reach the wide wooden seat.

"Would you have preferred me to shoot her? That would have been inconvenient for both of us. She would have surely died, and I would have had to deal with whoever heard the shot, if anyone did." He glanced at the tavern. They could still hear the sounds of music and laughter. As he climbed into the wagon, Felicity looked back at her unconscious sister. Angry tears sparkled on her eyelashes.

Jeff slid one pistol back under her jacket, but held the other firmly in one hand, as he took the reins with his other hand. He shook the reins, urging the matched black horses forward so that they all but raced away from the tavern, in spite of the heavy load they pulled. Jeff swung quickly around a corner, and as he did so, Felicity heard a strange nose, a sharp metallic snapping sound. The end of the seat Jeff was sitting on bounced up, and losing his balance he literally flew through the air as the horses took fright. Felicity made a grab for the reins, but the terrified horses bolted across the road before she could get hold. They had the bits in their teeth. She was sure of it.

She surveyed the road in a second. If she stayed on the wagon, she ran the risk of it turning over on her, and it was heavily laden with everything Jeff Galt had packed to take to his future new home. It could easily crush her. If she jumped, however, she had a good chance of getting caught in the wheels. What to do?

She made her decision and yanked up her light blue skirts in a most unladylike fashion. She stood up shakily, and sprang out, still holding them as high as she could. When she hit the ground, she was able to run a few steps, continuing her forward motion. Then she fell. Something incredibly hard and sharp hit her head, and it was as if all the cannons that had ever fired during the war were going off in her mind. She heard voices, faint voices, then she heard nothing more for a long time.


	13. Chapter 13

It's Hard To Refuse You

Chapter 13

Felicity had hit the ground running, but had only managed to keep upright for a few moments. She had seen several abandoned buildings swirl past right before she had hit the ground. When she opened her eyes again, she saw the night sky. She was being picked up. She felt herself being raised carefully. Felicity put a hand tentatively up to her head, and brought it away covered in blood. She quickly closed her eyes again. She heard voices…many voices, too many, all blending together in a strange hum. She tried to concentrate on one voice at a time, as much as it hurt to do so.

"Bring her in here," she heard Mrs. Deare say. "Lie her down carefully. We will need scissors, and a needle and thread."

"I have some in my receptacle. I never go anywhere without them," Felicity heard Nan say. "I shall go get them."

Once she was lying down, Felicity was able to force her eyes open again. The room she was in was dark and unfamiliar, except for a very large lamp next to the bed. She saw Ben standing off to the side, looking at her in horror. Charles came in with another lamp, which was placed on the other side of the bed. That made the room too bright. The light made her head hurt more. She closed her eyes again. She felt firm hands moving over her. Her head and her shoulder burned like fire.

"There do not appear to be any broken bones," Mrs. Deare said, her voice sounding farther away than it should. "But we are going to have to cut off her hair to get to the wound."

"Is that necessary?" Felicity heard Ben ask in a tight voice.

"The cut is on the back of her head and goes across to the side. It is long and deep," Mrs. Deare replied. "It's a nasty one. The blood is all matted in her hair, and we need to clean out the wound and sew it up. I will try to take off as little as I can."

Felicity wanted to tell them not to cut her hair. She was so defined by her vibrant red hair, and she knew how much Ben loved it, but she was not able to trust herself to speak. She was afraid is she opened her lips and said anything at all, she would lose control. She was afraid if she started screaming she would never be able to stop. So she clenched her jaw, and held her tongue as best as she could. It was something she was not good at, but as much as it went against her nature, she was determined to keep silent. Many people who suffered illnesses or injury had to have their hair cut. Many people had to suffer pain. She would manage.

"Here is the scissors," she heard Nan say. Felicity felt someone turning her head. She clenched her fists and arched her back, but many strong but gentle hands came to hold her still. She heard the sound of the scissors snipping, and a whooshing plop, as if something were being dropped into a bowl. Then there was a horrible stinging, and she winced, shutting her eyes even more tightly.

"That will do. That is as clean as we can get it," Mrs. Deare said firmly. "I do not think it will get infected, but you never know. We will have to keep an eye on it. Now I will try to stitch it up so that it begins to heal together without any more bleeding."

"I will do that," said Nan ruefully. "I am the best seamstress in the family, after all. You go and see to Polly. She has quite a nasty bruise. I sent some of the tavern staff to try to find her a piece of ice, but I don't know if they're back yet."

"Very well. Now that I can see it, I can tell Felicity's got a fairly clean cut. It could have been worse," Mrs. Deare said. "Keep the stitches small and as even as you can. Louisa is bringing some wax to put over the stitches when you are done."

Felicity felt the sting of the needle going through her scalp, in and out, but it was nothing compared to the ache in her shoulder. Each prick hurt only for a moment. Polly…she remembered Polly. How badly was her sister hurt? Would Polly be all right? She smelled something good, and realized it was the scented soap that Louisa always brought with her, wherever she went. Beautiful, lovable Louisa…how could she ever have been jealous of her? She was as dear to Felicity as any blood sister could be. Felicity was comforted to know that so many people who loved her were with her. She could sense their presence.

When it was over, Felicity again felt too many hands on her. Someone was lifting her; someone was sliding her out of her blue dress, and putting on something else, something softer, less stiff. Her lovely, lovely new dress that she had made especially for this party! It was probably ruined now.

What an odd thing to think of at such a time…she had never paid that much attention to clothes. Felicity felt more hands, cool hands, on her hot forehead, slipping a nightcap over her bandaged head. What a relief! She still had some hair left. They hadn't had to cut it all. She could feel some of it being drawn aside on the pillow. She let herself drift off to sleep.

When she opened one eye again, the room was black. One lone lamp still burned, but it had been turned down very low. It was so hard to move. It was especially hard to move her head. She opened the other eye with great difficulty. Where was she? For a moment, she could not remember. Was she in her bedroom at the plantation? Then where was Ben? Or was she at the Williamsburg house? Where were her bed curtains? She looked around for the walnut pitcher stand. It was not there. Who was that sitting in a strange chair next to her bed sound asleep?

Felicity forced herself to concentrate. It was Ben. He had deep circles under his eyes, and his hair was mussed. He must be very tired to sleep like that, in a straight-backed chair, with his chin on his chest. She calmed somewhat at the sight of him, but she still didn't know where she was. Her head ached, but more than the physical pain, she was frightened by the gnawing anxiety she felt. What had happened? Then she remembered.

Jeff Gault had tried to kidnap her. He had struck Polly and driven away. Where was Jeff now? Where was her sister? She remembered someone saying Polly had a bad bruise. How bad was it? The party must be over. Felicity knew that Nan and Charles were supposed to be on their way to Richmond. Had they gone? No, Nan had sewn up the cut in Felicity's scalp. Surely she would not have gone to Richmond without saying goodbye. They had had their differences. Their relationship moved like the tide, but Nan was still her sister. But how late was it? It was so dark. Felicity tried to think, but it was so hard. She closed her eyes again.

When she woke, the sky was the creamy gray color that signaled a new dawn. The chair beside her bed was empty. Where was Ben? Felicity did not want to be alone. She was too confused to bear it.

Very slowly, Felicity started to sit up. Her head felt like it was spinning, but she moved carefully and felt it seem to settle back onto her shoulders. She must find out what had happened to everyone else. She raised her head a bit higher, very slowly. If she moved that slowly, inch by inch, it was not too bad. Her shoulder burned like fire, but Felicity was able to throw back the blanket she had been covered with. It was plain, a sturdy woolen blanket, well-woven, but totally unfamiliar. There were bruises all over her arms. How dreadful.

She drew her legs carefully to the side of the bed and slipped them over. Her legs were bruised, too. She stared stupidly at her bare feet. She didn't remember them taking off her shoes, but of course, they must have done. They wouldn't have put her into this bed, strange or not, with shoes on. Her head began to throb.

A voice came from the doorway. "Felicity, what are you doing sitting up? Mrs. Deare says you must stay quiet." Nan came over to the bed, and eased Felicity back down, then recovered her with the blanket. "I will go fetch Ben. We've been taking turns watching over you. We did not think you would wake up for hours!"

Felicity laid her head back down on the pillow, and a throbbing pain rushed through her head. Nan was still here. She had not gone to Richmond. What time was it? What day was it? How many hours had passed? She tried to think, but the throbbing pain began to move around inside her head, whirling in circles, making it impossible to think of anything at all. It filled her whole head, and she slipped into blessed unconsciousness.

When she woke again, she felt the heaviness of autumn sun and heat. Ben was back on the chair at her bedside, smiling slightly. She couldn't understand how he could be smiling.

"Felicity, you look so much better! You were so pale last night, you looked like a wraith. Word spread throughout the whole town that you had been killed. I spent hours receiving callers who wanted to console me or help with the funeral."

"What did you do with them?" Felicity asked, carefully choosing short words, not sure how well she would be able to speak. Ben heard the rasp in her voice, and got her some water. She flinched when she tried to raise her head to get the glass to her mouth. He quickly angled the glass to her lips, so she would not have to move her head so much.

The water was not very cool, but it felt wonderful going down. Felicity took several sips, as Ben answered, "I let them busy themselves contacting old man Gault to see what he wants done with the body of his son, damn them both to hell."

"Jeff is dead?" Felicity gasped.

"Yes, he was killed when the wagon crashed. He broke his blasted neck, which saved me the trouble of doing it for him." Ben's voice seethed with rage.

"He is the one who tried to kill you before. It was always Jeff," she said, drawing her face away from the glass.

"I know. I understand everything now. You're lucky you took the notion to jump when you did. If you had gone flying off the wagon when it crashed, it might have been worse for you. They had to cut off a hank of your hair to get at the cut you made when you hit the ground. We have some witnesses to the wagon crash, but no one actually saw you jump. We think that when you started falling, you landed on your shoulder first, and then hit your head on a rock on the side of the road. We were afraid your collar bone was broken, but it held. It is only badly bruised. You have six stitches in your head. Nan put them in."

Ben put the glass down, sat back in his chair and sighed. "As soon as the skin starts to knit back together, they'll have to be picked out, and it will hurt, but Nan and Mrs. Deare both think they will not hurt as much coming out as they did going in. I am glad you jumped out of the wagon. That was good thinking. As badly as you were hurt, it would have been even more dangerous if you had jumped later, when the speed picked up."

"It seemed as if we were speeding along quite well as it was," Felicity said wryly. "Those poor horses were maddened. Are they all right?"

Ben laughed. "Leave it to you, my love, to worry about the horses! They were cut on the flanks by debris, but they will live. Old Mr. Gault may want to take them with him when he comes. I do not know."

Felicity smiled wanly. "The sight of the horses bolting is just one of the last things I remember. I shall never forget the sight." She sighed and tried to think further back. "Ben, don't be cruel to Mr. Galt when he comes. There was nothing he could have done about this. Jeff ahs been on his own for years." She tried to think about what else she needed to say.

"What happened to Polly? Jeff hit her with a pistol! He didn't want to shoot her, because he wanted to keep both guns loaded, thank God, but he hit her quite hard."

"She had a nasty bruise on the side of her chin, but she will be well in no time. Mrs. Deare gave her some herbs to help her sleep. She left some for you, in case the pain gets too bad. Do you want to sleep some more? It is not like the tavern is so full up that they need their room back."

Oh! She was still at the tavern! That made more sense. Felicity would have shaken her head, if it had not hurt so badly. She settled for rolling her eyes. "I have slept enough. I want to spend some time with you. I was afraid I'd never see you or the children again. Jeff was trying to take me to the territories. He thought we would be able to hide there and he would be able to start a new life."

"You are my life, Felicity. There would not have been a corner in hell where he could have hidden you from me. I would have found you. I love you more than my life," Ben said firmly, taking her hand. "I can understand what it's like to want you so badly, to want you for so long, but you are mine, and always will be."

"Now that I am awake, I suppose Nan and Charles will be leaving soon," Felicity sighed wistfully.

"Actually, Nan was so worried about you and Polly, that she asked Charles if they could stay with us for awhile. I know you all fuss at each other from time to time, and that your personalities are quite different, but deep down Nan loves you very much. Charles was delighted. He loves you both, too, and was equally as worried. And Charles was not sure about whether moving this late in the year was actually a good idea anyway. He gave it some more thought and decided that he didn't think it would be the best time to set up his new shop after all. So they are going to leave the things they sent to Brett in storage, and come to stay with us at the plantation until the spring. It looks like we are going to have at least one last big family Christmas, at least. Do you mind?"

Felicity smiled thinking of Christmas on the plantation, and how lovely they could make it. "No, I do not. I think that would be wonderful. It will mean the world to Father, and give us all a chance to enjoy being together before we have to part for good."

"It won't be for good, Felicity. We will all get together, as much as we can."

"But it will never be the same," Felicity mused.

"Perhaps it will be better," said Ben. "And you might like Richmond. They do not have to come see us all the time. We can go see them."

"You would take me all the way to Richmond, with the children, to see Charles and Brett and Nan if I asked you to?"

"It is hard for me to refuse you anything, Mrs. Davidson, as well you know." Ben laughed, and Felicity joined in, until her head began to hurt too much. "I shall bring you some breakfast, if you would like. Then I need to go back to the house and tell the others that you are awake. Everyone has been worried sick about you."

"Perhaps a cup of tea would suit me. I do not feel hungry yet. I still feel too raw. Are the children all right? Perhaps they can come to see me after I have my tea," Felicity said, looking worried, as Ben rose from his chair.

"Good as gold, or better. They miss you, I'm sure, but they are being well-taken care of by all the aunts and uncles and cousins. The nursemaids are complaining about being idle."

"I could use a bit of idleness myself," Felicity said dryly. "I have had enough excitement to last me for the rest of the year. I can't wait to get everyone back to the plantation."

"That's what I'm looking forward to as well," Ben said, leaning over her to give her a careful kiss.

Nan brought Felicity her tea. "You are looking better," she said dryly, as she poured out a cup and added some sugar.

"I still hurt almost everywhere, but I am so relieved to be here, that I cannot complain," Felicity said, as her sister helped her slowly inch her way up onto some pillows propped behind her on the bed, so that she could sit up in comfort.

Felicity winced as the nightcap on her head brushed against the pillow, and gingerly raised a hand to straighten it. "Good sewing, Nan, by the way."

Nan smirked. "I was always the best seamstress in the family. You never paid a bit of attention to Mother when she tried to get you to take it seriously. I do declare, I never thought I'd ever have to do that kind of sewing, but it seems to have worked better than I could have dreamed. I thought Mrs. Deare was mad when I realized what she was trying to do, but she was right, as usual. She's getting so old, though, that I feared her hand would shake and she would wind up sewing your scalp to your pillow case." She paused. "Did Ben tell you that Charles and I are coming to stay with you for awhile?"

"Yes, and I'm glad you are staying with us at the plantation for awhile," Felicity admitted, sipping her tea. What a wonderful thing tea was, when you had a headache! She briefly thought back to the war. How had they ever done without it?

"It just seemed like the best thing to do. Charles and Ben think so, and Brett understands." Nan looked thoughtful for a moment. "We will have to make this Christmas nice for Father. He has had such a difficult year."

"Have we not all had a bad year?" Felicity exclaimed. "It can only get better from here."

Poly came in and joined them, and to Felicity's great relief, her sister seemed fine except for a black bruise on her jaw. The sisters all had a cup of tea and complimented each other on their bravery and quick thinking until Brandon and Louisa came to Felicity's room with their boys to say goodbye. Then it was too close and crowded in the room, and Polly and Nan slipped away.

The elder Davidsons had to get back home because Brandon had so much work to do. Adam was mightily impressed by the way his aunt had jumped off a runaway wagon, but he and his baby brother were both curious about what had been done to her hair. Andrew, safe from his perch in his father's arms, kept tilting his small head to look at her.

Adam, a spirited child, frankly told her that he didn't like her cap, and Louisa, mortified by her outspoken son, had hurried to hush him, but Felicity, laughing, waved Louisa away. Hugging the little boy tightly, she assured him that she didn't think much of it either, and promised to grow her hair back as quickly as she could. She adored Louisa's boys. Adam reminded her a little bit of her younger, more headstrong self. Andrew, a sweet boy with a good nature reminded Felicity more of William as a child. As Brandon cuddled his son, Felicity had to close her eyes to banish the image of the way Ben had played with William during his early days in Williamsburg. Felicity knew Brandon had to go, and of course, that he would want to take his family with him, but she would miss them terribly.

"You'll come back to the plantation for Christmas, won't you?" Felicity begged.

Brandon tilted his head thoughtfully. "I hope I can. I can think of no reason strong enough to keep me away from a Merriman feast."

"Nothing but death would keep us away from that," Louisa laughed. "Your table is legendary. And the children do so love to play together."

"Nan let us take the ark to the plantation," Felicity said, looking over at Adam slyly.

"I am too big to play with that," he said importantly. "When I come to your plantation next, Saul is going to teach me to ride, and Marcus promised to teach me to whittle."

"That sounds like fun," Felicity said thoughtfully, making a mental note to buy her nephew the finest jackknife in the nation for Christmas.

"Won't it be lovely to have things back to normal?" Louisa sighed.

"Yes," Felicity agreed. "Nan and I were just talking about that. Things can only get better from here! We're all safe now."

But of course they were not. Brandon and Louisa had no sooner gotten on the road than an urgent message came to Williamsburg for Ben. He was sitting with Felicity when it was brought in to her rented bedchamber. Mrs. Deare wanted her to not move and to spend at least two more days in bed, because she was still weak from blood loss, and bruised from head to toe. There was definitely no way she could manage the ride back to the plantation comfortably. She watched with interest as Ben opened the message, then with alarm as his face fell when he read it.

"What is the matter?"

Ben crushed the letter. "Saul has passed away. I suppose it was to be expected. He was getting on in age, and had slowed down quite a bit, but I will miss him terribly. No one knew more about horses than he did. If I hadn't of had Saul, I could never have gotten the stables going the way I did."

"Poor Saul!" Felicity cried. "We must do something for Ethan and Marcus. They will miss him so." Hot tears stung her eyes. Thinking of Saul reminded her of green fields, of horses and leather, and above all, of her grandfather. Saul had been one of the last links to the old days. How much had changed since then, but Saul had been a fixed point in her universe. Now that link was broken.

"I will have to send Bryce and Elizabeth back to the plantation at once to take charge," Ben decided. "I know you enjoy having Elizabeth with you, but Bryce will need her there as he tries to reorganize."

"Of course," Felicity said. "I wish I could go myself, but every time I try to get up, I still get a splitting headache. I can't imagine what it would feel like after that trip down the road. Perhaps Father should go, too. He has known Saul longer than any of us."

"Good idea. I shall ask him."

Ben went to talk to Bryce, Elizabeth and Mr. Merriman, and they all agreed to start out at once. With any luck, they could make it to the plantation to see Saul laid in the burying ground by the river that was set aside for the slaves. When Elizabeth came to say goodbye with little Ann, Felicity promised to come as soon as she could. Elizabeth confided that she suspected Ann might be having a new brother or sister arrive in the spring, perhaps in late April or early May, and Elizabeth wanted this new arrival to be born on the plantation. There would be nothing left for them in Williamsburg by then. As much as the girls loved Mrs. Deare, it was impractical to plan on her delivering the children any more.

Felicity was delighted by the news, but as Bryce and Elizabeth had not told anyone else yet, she promised to say nothing. Elizabeth knew Felicity would not even breathe a word to Ben until she said so. She had wanted to tell her friend, though, hoping that it would cheer Felicity up after her ordeal.

"Even after all of this, though, and the loss of Saul, I think we are heading for brighter days," Felicity told Elizabeth. "Louisa told me it was lovely to see things getting back to normal, and I think she was right. For us, family is normal."

"You are not the sister of my blood," Elizabeth told Felicity firmly, "but you are the sister of my heart." Felicity kept those words in her own heart as her father Elizabeth and Bryce left for the plantation. She would be there soon.

Authors note: I worked on this chapter a long time, much longer than I had planned to. I wanted it to be the last, but there was still too much to say and too many loose ends to tie up. So there will be one more for sure and possible an epilogue.

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	14. Chapter 14

It's Hard to Refuse You

Chapter 14

Felicity was more or less her old self by the end of the week. Her bruises faded from dark blackish purple to yellowish green. Her head and shoulder still ached a bit, especially when she moved too quickly, but she was improving.

She did not see Mr. Galt when he came to town. She did not wish to, and he did not wish to speak to her. Ben and Charles had tried to keep his visit to Williamsburg short and to the point. There were very few people left in town that old Mr. Galt still knew anyway, and no one wanted to cause a scene. As far as he knew his son had been planning to leave town, and had been killed in an accident when his overloaded wagon had crashed, and that was it. The most dedicated gossips of Williamsburg had not wanted to start shoveling dirt around the broken old man.

Ben and Felicity met a few people at the inn during her convalescence who had been lucky enough to be in attendance at George Washington's plantation, Mount Vernon, when Washington's old friend, Lafayette had visited there in August. Felicity could not get enough of their descriptions of the Marquis, of whom she was still very fond.

On October 28th, 1784, the family left Williamsburg for what many of them knew would be the last time. Mr. Merriman, growing feeble now, slowly toured the town with Polly and Nan during the days before they left, looking intently at places he used to frequent, empty homes that had belonged to friends, bits of road that were as familiar as his children's faces. Mr. Merriman walked through the house slowly. There was little left in it. Most of his former possessions had been sent to the plantation, or dispersed to people he knew and loved, but each door, mantle and window drew his interest. During this walk through the house, garden and stable, he wanted no one with him. He waved away anyone who tried to join him, as he said goodbye in his own way to the town that had once made him prosperous.

Felicity longed to return to the plantation, to see Elizabeth and Bryce and little Ann, to see the horses in the pastures, and the pantries filled with food, laid away for the winter. The plantation would sustain them, in body and spirit.

She could not wait for Christmas. She longed for pine boughs and holly, for the chance to spoil the children and servants with small gifts, to sing carols and fill the house with the smell of baking, pies and roasting turkeys and hams. She was already planning it in her head, when they left town.

Nan and Charles and Ben smiled as she outlined her ideas, and even Mr. Merriman perked up a bit. Felicity knew the moment he got back, he would be out to the burying ground, to tidy up the plots and tell Martha Merriman all the things he had done since his last visit up to the grave on the hill.

To Felicity's delight, Mr. McIntosh gave to visit shortly after she and Ben arrived back at King's Creek. He had been attending to some business in Yorktown, and had gone out of his way to visit with his friends in Virginia, on his way home to the Carolinas.

"I wish you could have brought Mary," Felicity said wistfully, over a cup of hot cider. "How is she? And how is my little Connor? I want you to bring him to see our stables some time. And Claire…I want Mercy and Ann and Claire to be good friends, as we are. What about coming for Christmas? I think you would all enjoy one of our plantation Christmas feasts."

M. McIntosh laughed. "I would love to bring them. John and Thomas are especially eager to see you again. I think John has a bit of an infatuation for you, Mrs. Davidson, although he would not be pleased to see what you've done to your hair. What happened to your crowning glory?"

Felicity shrugged. "An accident, that is now over and best forgot. It will grow again, perhaps even before you bring the family to see us."

"If I had known you were going to be in Yorktown, I would have told my brother to offer you his hospitality," Ben remarked, but Mr. McIntosh looked grave when Yorktown was mentioned.

"I was glad to get away," he said, as Felicity offered him a piece of his favorite apple pie. "There's illness in the town. Many people are suffering from colds and sore throats. Some say it is cholera starting, and some say the symptoms the townsfolk are suffering are beginning to assume a typhoid character. Stay away from Yorktown, and tell your family there to keep indoors and away from crowds as much as they can."

"Brandon and Louisa and the boys are going to come here for Christmas, too," Felicity told him. "It will do them good to get out of the city."

"Maybe so," he said, "but if any of them feel ill, it would be best for them to stay in the comfort of their own homes."

Ben and Felicity had a party to introduce Mr. McIntosh to some of their neighbors, and even invited the Wentworths. Old Mrs. Wentworth had passed on, but her husband, who had always been more congenial than his wife, was happy to come with his three sons, who had taken over the management of his plantation. The ladies and gentlemen on the neighboring plantations had always been very fond of Felicity's mother, and now that the war was over, were eager to mend the ties that had been strained by that conflict.

The oldest son, Jacob, had a quiet mousy wife named Susan, that Felicity did not find very interesting, and she found the middle son, David, who was witty and quick, to be more fun. The youngest, Edward, was very interested in horses, and so got along quite well with Mr. McIntosh, Felicity and Ben. He was interested in how the plantation had been transformed into a horse breeding farm, but his oldest brother and father were not interested in doing something similar on their land.

To Felicity's delight, Edward seemed quite taken with Polly. Felicity was terrified that her sister would be an old maid, and encouraged her sister to get to know the young man better. They had a lot of fun remembering days gone by on the plantation, and Felicity had all four Wentworth men laughing uproariously when she told them the story of the time she had slipped her itchy stockings down at table and how they had flopped around her ankles when she had followed her grandfather and the other gentleman outside to look at the horses.

Old Mr. Wentworth remembered that day well. "Your grandfather bought you a horse that day, a fine thoroughbred. She had been mistreated and was quite wild. I feared for your life when you ran toward her."

"That was my Penny, my first horse," Felicity said. "I had lost her and feared ever finding her again. That was one of the happiest days of my life."

"I do not remember the horse," said Edward Wentworth, "but I remember my mother saying afterward that you were the most fidgety child she had ever seen."

"Felicity probably was the most fidgety child your mother had ever seen," Polly said, laughing, and Edward laughed with her.

Ben warned Felicity about the dangers of matchmaking attempts backfiring, but to her delight, the two young people seemed to be getting along fine. There was no chance that David would inherit much from his father, but a neighboring plantation was for sale. The couple that had owned it had been friends of Felicity's grandfather, but two of their sons had both died during the war, and the last one was growing old, and could no longer manage the place. Young Edward, more sympathetic to his brother than his father, wanted to join with his brother to buy it and bring it back to life. Together they thought they could manage it.

They were considering asking Mr. Wentworth for their shares of his estate in cash, so that they could begin the work in the following spring. Felicity was hoping old Mr. Wentworth would agree, because if he did, she could see a wedding in her sister's future. A dowry from Polly would certainly help get the plantation back on its feet, and she and Ben would be happy to provide it, if it came to that.

After Samuel McIntosh had gone on his way, Felicity asked Ben if he thought they should invite Louisa and the boys to come to King's Creek right away, instead of waiting. "If it is unhealthy in the town, perhaps they would be better off here," she said.

"Brandon cannot leave his business," Ben said, "and it is too hard a trip for Louisa to make alone with the boys. I will write to them, and ask, but I do not think they will come so soon."

This he did, and Brandon wrote back to them, telling them of the problems in Yorktown. He said the cholera epidemic was affecting many families. He and Louisa were keeping their boys at home, but the children were unhappy in the house, and getting into all sorts of mischief, which was keeping Louisa busy trying to entertain them. Brandon said that when he went to his office, he had to pass death carts rolling down the streets, taking the victims of the epidemic to the town's cemeteries. He hoped that the plague would pass quickly. He and Louisa had discussed leaving town for awhile, but had decided against it. It was not likely that the family would come to visit until after the worst was over.

The next letter filled Felicity with a sense of foreboding. Louisa had been busy in her sewing room, making Brandon a new coat, and the maids, busy with household chores had lost track of the boys who had been playing quietly with each other in their playroom on the second floor of the house. They had slipped out and gone for a walk. A sudden storm had drenched them and they had turned up back at home permeated with cold. They were now both sneezing and coughing, but Brandon assured his brother that it looked like it was just a common cold. Louisa was nursing them herself, although the doctor was coming in every day. Felicity and Ben began to prepare for Christmas, and waited anxiously for word on when their relatives would be well enough to come and visit.

The only good news came from Edward Wentworth, who rode over to visit Polly regularly. He and his brother had convinced their father to stake them to the neighboring plantation, and if the sale went through as planned in the spring, he intended to marry Polly in the fall. Ben discussed the dowry Polly would be bringing to the marriage, and Edward was humbled by the generosity of the Davidsons.

"How do you feel about sharing a home with David?" Felicity asked her sister one day.

"It's what I'm used to," she replied. "And Edward will need a lot of help with the work. I never thought I'd find anyone to love me, and now at last I have. I will finally be able to have a home and children of my own. Since Edward and Father have the same name, we've already decided to name our first child Edward as well."

"You had better hope it is not a girl," Felicity said dryly.

The next letter from Yorktown came in a black-bordered envelope. Both boys had been seized by chills, and despite the best care available had become prostrate. Louisa had battled to save them, giving them regular doses of calomel, and swabbing their sore throats with nitrate of silver, but they had died within days of each other, and exhausted from nursing and overcome by grief and exhaustion, Louisa had also died later the same bleak November week. All three had been buried before the letter even reached the plantation. Brandon would not be coming for Christmas. He was in his own private hell, and didn't have the energy to rouse from it.

Ben and Felicity wept in each other's arms, and then sank into the matching rockers before the fire, as a thousand memories flooded back for each of them. For Ben, a light had gone from the world. The brother who had protected him and strengthened him had not been able to protect his own family. Ben thought of how he would feel if it were his own wife and children, left alone in the darkness of the grave on the hill. Felicity ached for the talented girl who had loved life so much and lived it so well, and for the darling boys who had been so much a part of her life for so long.

The McIntosh family managed to rouse them from their grief long enough to celebrate the season. Mary and Samuel knew that Felicity was a social person, and not the type to enjoy brooding alone. She would, they felt, want as many of her friends around her as possible. So although they had considered canceling their planned trip to the plantation, they decided at last to come. Mary knew her young ones would bring cheer to the dismal house, and in preparing gifts and food for the visitors, Felicity was indeed able to occupy her mind.

All of the McIntosh children were well behaved and as good natured as their parents. It helped to mend Felicity's broken heart to give Samuel and Mary's twelve year old John the knife she had planned to give her nephew, as he had longed for one for several years and appreciated it very much. He hugged Felicity hard, blushing to the roots of his sandy hair, after he opened the package, and she hugged him back just as hard. Nan took ten year old Mary Jane and eight year old Margaret under her wing and began to teach them stitches. Mary Jane could already do a bit of embroidery, but she was very impressed with Nan's skill, which had only improved over the years.

Little Connor went with Felicity to the stables every morning to see the horses, and petite Claire eyed Ann and Mercy with a baby's interest in new people. Matthew and Thomas were inseparable from the moment the carriage arrived. It looked like the children indeed were on their way to becoming good friends.

Charles and Nan, who had received the same letter that Ben and Felicity had gotten, came from Richmond, more mindful than ever of the need for family. Brett accompanied them. He had gone to see Brandon as soon as he'd heard the news, and reported that his brother's dark hair had gone almost white during the illness of his wife and boys. Brett had tried to convince Brandon to get away from Yorktown for awhile, but had not had any luck. Brandon had thrown himself into his work, spending all of his free hours just walking the floors of his now silent house.

Bryce was as bereft as Ben, and had also offered to go to Yorktown to fetch Brandon for Christmas, his heart breaking for his elder brother, but nothing could induce Brandon away from the house that had once been a home.

"He just needs to have his own things around him at this time," Elizabeth said gently, when the Davidson men sat in the parlor one night, discussing their brother's state. "We all think we know how he feels, but none of us really do. He has to come to terms with this on his own."

Mary McIntosh agreed. "I lost my parents within a week of each other, and I did not want to deal with anyone. I had to greet the callers who came to mourn with me, but what I really wanted was solitude, to think, and reflect, and take stock of my life. When Brandon is ready for company, he will let you know."

Edward Wentworth, who had come over to comfort Polly, and reconnect with the Davidson's friends from Charleston, agreed. "It takes time to come to terms with loss. Mother ruled us with an iron fist, but when she was gone, there was a hole in my heart that took a long time to begin to heal."

Their prayers that Christmas were for both the living and the lost, and they kept their loved ones close to their hearts. Mr. Merriman, who had been affected deeply by the loss to their family, took wreaths of pine and holly to the graveyard to place on the resting places of his own loved one, and spent a great deal of time there, asking his lost loved ones to remember the living, and if possible guide the newly dead to their reward in heaven, where they would all be reunited in the fullness of time. In his heart, he knew that family is forever, and that he would soon see the missing members of his family again.

The New Year, 1785, started better. Charles had his new store open and wrote often, giving the rest of the family details of how things were going. There were lots of birthdays to celebrate, all through the spring, and the family made an effort to get together on those occasions at King's Creek, with the exception of Brandon, who was still deep in mourning.

Elizabeth received news several times of Annabelle, and her parents, who were doing well and were hoping to be able to come for a visit that summer. Lord Harry looked forward to seeing Ben again, as well as meeting his nieces and nephews. Ben was eager to show off his stables, but disaster struck again in May, when the Coles arrived, minus Lord Harry. He had died suddenly and Annabelle was now widowed.

This news coaxed Brandon to King's Cross. The family had been trying to convince him to come back to the plantation for a visit for some time, and he had just about decided to come to meet Elizabeth's family when this new development occurred. The thought of meeting Annabelle, who understood more than anyone else what he was going through, drew him back to the family at last. She was childless, so her circumstances were different, but still, she understood his loss and they spent quite a bit of time together.

Annabelle was in no hurry to go back to England, since her husband's title had passed to a cousin, who had never been pleased with the idea of having a cousin-in-law from the colonies. The new Lord Lacey had been only too happy to be rid of the Coles, whom he had considered somewhat of an embarrassment. Annabelle talked to Brandon about this, and they both had many stories to tell about living in families with Loyalist leanings during the war. It surprised Felicity to see how much the two had in common, but it pleased her as well.

Grief had made Annabelle a more thoughtful young woman, and Felicity began to hope that once the pair had finished their period of mourning, they might find a way to make a life together. Annabelle was still beautiful, and her sadness, by nature of its honesty, made her seem even lovelier. She took great comfort from her namesake, little Ann, just as Brandon found a great deal of comfort in Nan's little Lou.

"Are you matchmaking again, my Lissie?" Ben asked her one day, after she had seen Annabelle and Brandon off on a ride.

"Time and their own hearts must match the ones we love, as my dear mother used to say, but there's no harm in giving broken hearts a little encouragement to go on," she replied.

The Coles were in no hurry to go back, either. They were hungry for little ones, not only pleased to see their little granddaughter Ann, but amused and soothed by the liveliness of the Davidson home. Ann for her part, charmed her grandparents, and Mr. Cole spent a lot of time reminiscing with Mr. Merriman about the past glory of Williamsburg. They both regretted the deterioration of the town, and hoped that someday, somehow, it would rise again, and once more be the way they knew it. They remembered Ben's other brothers from Felicity's wedding, and that also brought back fond memories to discuss.

The two youngest Wentworth men closed the deal on their plantation, and Edward and Polly began to plan their wedding. They wanted to marry after harvest, which suited everyone in the family very well.

The McIntosh family came for the annual Davidson and Merriman summer barbecue in July and wound up staying nearly a month with their noisy brood, which only added to the recovering spirits of the house. John, Thomas and Connor learned to fish in the river, although Connor continued to be more interested in horses than his brother. Mary and Margaret played games and often followed Polly to the blackberry patch to help pick berries for pies. The quartet of small girls, Lou, Mercy, Ann and Claire were not old enough to play properly, but there were plenty of laps for them all to sit on, and lots of attention to receive. Matthew, a precocious toddler, followed the older boys and girls when he could, and being used to smaller children, they tolerated him with good grace.

At the barbecue, Felicity looked out over the large table, spread with the plantation's bounty she knew she had a great deal to be thankful for.

The adults had a lively discussion about the Land Ordinance, which set forth how the government would measure, divide, and distribute the land it had acquired from the British north and west of the Ohio River at the end of the war. The Treaty of Paris, in 1783 had given the Ohio Country to the new United States, but numerous problems had occurred concerning control of the land. For one thing, Native American tribes refused to agree that the land even belonged to the United States.

"That is hardly a surprise," Charles said wryly, when Brett brought this fact up.

Other states had also tried to stake a claim to the land. They'd gotten permission from the king to control this land when they were still colonies, and while they hadn't thought much of the king when it came to most things, on this matter they were still quite supportive of their previous agreement.

The Confederation Congress had hoped to sell the land to raise funds, since they were not allowed by the Articles of Confederation to tax their citizens. Many people feared that illegal settlers would move into these areas and form their own country. This was a legitimate fear, since the Appalachian Mountains left these lands so isolated from the rest of the nation. The Confederation Congress had quite a job to negotiate with the Indians and the states before the federal government could claim sole ownership of all that land.

The Land Ordinance of 1784 established that these western lands would eventually become separate states, while these negotiations went on, but it had done nothing to decide how the land would be settled or distributed. This was what the new Land Ordinance of 1785 did. Government surveyors had begun to divide the territory into townships, which were numbered.

Sections were reserved to provide land bounties to war veterans. The rest would be sold at public auction. The minimum bid for a 640 acre parcel was a dollar an acre. Squatters would continue to move into the Ohio Country, and Indians would continue to refuse to leave what they considered their home, but the nation was definitely poised to grow.

"Perhaps some of our children will settle there someday," Charles remarked, causing each mother present to quickly cling to her own. No one wanted to think of their children going so far away. It was hard enough to keep the families in contact now. The idea of having the children go where they might never be seen again was too upsetting.

So they began to talk about Polly and Edward's upcoming wedding, which was a much safer topic, as it was something they were all looking forward to.

"You'll come, won't you?" Polly begged Mary and Samuel McIntosh. "I remember telling my mother at Elizabeth's wedding that mine would be even grander, and I think it will. You are like family, and we would love to have you, wouldn't we Lissie?"

"Of course you are welcome," Felicity agreed.

"If we can come, we certainly will," said Mr. McIntosh. "Having such a small family of our own, we're delighted to share yours."

"I wouldn't call your family small," Ben said wryly, watching their Connor as he handed flowers to Mercy, who was cheerfully shredding them all over the blanket she was sitting on, But Ben knew what his friend had meant. It was extended family they lacked, and Ben often wondered if that is why Mary and Samuel had welcomed so many youngsters themselves.

When the McIntosh family went back to Charleston, Felicity missed them, but it was a relief to have the size of the household reduced. Nan and Charles went back to Richmond with Brett soon after, and while Ann and Mercy missed their cousin, that also calmed things down a bit.

Brandon went back to Yorktown, and to Felicity's delight, took Annabelle and her parents with him, leading Felicity and been to suspect that as soon as the black mourning band came off his arm, he'd have a new wife to bring life back to his bleak existence.

"Do you think Louisa would mind?" Felicity asked Ben one night.

"I think she would want him to be happy," Ben replied, and Felicity hoped that was true.

Edward Wentworth and Polly were busy planning their new home and preparing for their wedding, which came quicker than anyone could have imagined. Time flies when there is an event to plan.

In November, everyone gathered once again, to see Polly's face glow with beauty and Edward's with pride, as they became man and wife. As the McIntoshes left King's Creek for Charleston once more, Mr. McIntosh remarked to his sons, "If you boys ever wish to indulge in this sort of thing, I hope you marry girls as fine as the ones you've met here."

John looked up at his father and said manfully for a boy not yet thirteen, "We'll do our best to please you, sir."


	15. Chapter 15

It's Hard to Refuse You

Epilogue

When Louisa Prentis, the only child of prosperous Richmond storekeeper Charles Prentis was betrothed to Edgar Canby, the young owner of Myrtle Manor Plantation in April of 1800, no one in Richmond was surprised. The young man had long been smitten with the lovely Louisa, and when his father passed on after a long and debilitating illness, it was clear that the young man would need a wife. He had doubled his efforts to convince Louisa Prentis that she was that woman.

Louisa had taken her time making her choice. She had dissected the prospects of the young men in Richmond with the dexterity of a surgeon until she finally settled on Edgar, and everyone who knew the young couple was pleased that his persistent wooing had finally won the day. Wealthy, good looking and intelligent, he was a man that she could love, respect and understand. The fact that his kiss, when she finally allowed him to kiss her properly, took her breath away certainly sealed the deal.

Her parents, Charles and Nan Prentis, and her bachelor uncle, Brent Davidson, who was also a prosperous Richmond businessman, were all pleased by the match. Canby's home in town was one of the finest homes in the city, and his plantation just outside the town was equally well known.

Their plans for their lavish engagement party had been the talk of the town, and it was indeed a glittering affair, all that she had ever dreamed of, but Louisa was more concerned with their upcoming trip to Virginia. Edgar was coming along to meet the rest of Louisa's family. All of Louisa's extensive family met every summer for a barbecue at her Uncle Ben Davidson's horse farm.

In her gown of white lawn, Louisa and Edgar took a few moments to sip some punch and as they surveyed the party. She smiled. The four downstairs rooms and hallway of her parent's house had been opened up for the reception and dancing, and people were milling about, having a wonderful time.

Richmond took its dancing seriously. It was a great comfort to Louisa that she had found a man who could manage the traditional Virginia reels, as well as do an elegant waltz. She did so love to dance.

Edgar, as he adjusted the flower in his buttonhole, thought about the upcoming trip. He had heard of the Davidson's horse farm. Nearly everyone in Virginia had. The Davidson horses were known all over the world for their speed and their strength. He was looking forward to seeing King's Creek for himself.

Louisa had told him many things about her family over the years. She had told him stories she had heard about her great-grandfather, who had started King's Creek as a plantation, growing oats and wheat, and how he had left it to her Merriman grandmother and grandfather, when he had passed away. She had not known her grandmother, but her grandfather had lived a long life, and Louisa could tell many stories about him.

She had grieved long and hard when she had received the news of his passing. She had been a child then, but Edgar had known her as a child, and remembered well how solemn she had gotten the year Edward Merriman had died.

Long before Edward Merriman's passing, though, he had given the plantation over to his eldest child, Felicity, and her husband, Benjamin Davidson. His only son had died in childhood, and Felicity, Louisa told him, had been the eldest daughter, and her father's favorite. According to Louisa, her Aunt Felicity's husband had started off as an apprentice at the elder Mr. Merriman's store in Williamsburg. Later on, not long after he had married his wife, Ben and his brother, Bryce, had turned the plantation into Virginia's finest farm for breeding and training horses.

"You'll adore my Aunt Felicity," Louisa assured him, as they went into the Prentis parlor the day after their engagement party to have tea. "She and my mother are quite different, though. Felicity has more spirit." She reached for the caddy, and the fragrant smell of the tea leaves filled the room.

Edgar considered this. Nan Prentis was a perfect lady at all times, and often made Edgar nervous. Perhaps Aunt Felicity would be more fun. Edgar was a man of the world, most used to city life. He had able managers for his own plantation and didn't spend a lot of time there. He couldn't imagine what it would be like to live in the country all year round like the Davidson family did, and wondered how he would feel out at their country home. He might need extra help to get used to this plantation Louisa was always talking about, but he was bound and determined to do so. His future wife obviously loved the place, and he wanted to love it, too, for her sake, but he was quite sure it would be much different from his plantation outside of the large city of Richmond.

"Your Aunt Felicity has four children, does she not?" Edgar asked, as a servant brought in the tea things and a platter heaped with ginger cookies. Louisa served tea like a gentlewoman. It was comforting to see her carefully handle the teapot. It reminded him of his mother, and how she liked to fuss when company came to call. He hoped at some point to be able to take her along to meet the rest of Louisa's family, but she was too exhausted from the preparations for the engagement party to even consider making this particular upcoming trip.

"Yes. Matthew is the eldest. He married a girl from Charleston last year…Claire McIntosh. The McIntosh family has been friends with my family as long as I can remember. Their son, John is married to my cousin, Ann. She's the only daughter of Bryce Davidson and his wife, Elizabeth. They also have a son named William, but he is not married."

"Your cousins married quite young," Edgar commented, taking up his delicate china teacup.

"So did my Aunt Felicity, and my mother, for that matter," Nan said with a smile. "When the members of my family make up their minds, they really do make up their minds and stand by their decisions."

She dismissed the servant, and then continued. "John and Ann live on the McIntosh plantation. My cousin Mercy, Matthew's younger sister, married John's brother, Thomas. He works in his father's business in town. Mark Davidson is unmarried as of yet. My father would like him to move here to Richmond and help him with the stores, but we'll see. Ben and Felicity's youngest, Minette, is much too young to marry at present. I think Connor McIntosh is sweet on her, though, and my Aunt Felicity is pressing his suit. Aunt Felicity would like to see Matthew and Connor take over the farm some day. They are the best with horses, and get along about as well as Ben and Bryce."

"I take it I'd better get along with the McIntosh family," Edgar teased her. "You seem to be quite connected to them. Didn't they have a relative for you to marry?"

Louisa laughed. "No, but they have two other daughters, Mary Jane Middleton and Margaret Johnston. Their husbands are both prosperous rice planters in Charleston. It isn't as bad as it sounds, you see. We do bring new blood into the family, my darling. Aunt Elizabeth was a Cole, and while it's true, her sister, Annabelle, married my Uncle Brandon Davidson; it was only after they had both been widowed. His first wife was my father's older sister, Louisa. That's the one I'm named for. They have two daughters, Constance and Catherine. And my Aunt Polly Merriman married a man from a neighboring plantation, Edward Wentworth. They have three children. The oldest is named after his father, and the girls are named Charlotte and Julia, after his mother and grandmother."

"I will never be able to sort all these people out," Edgar told his betrothed. "I can't wait to start putting more faces to these names."

"They will all love you, as I do," Louisa said solemnly, helping herself to a ginger cookie.

As they packed for the trip to King's Creek, Louisa and her mother chattered about the successful engagement party. Nan had been well-satisfied with the music, food, and the number of prosperous Richmond families who had seen fit to attend. She was high society by Richmond standards, and she enjoyed that.

"I couldn't get over how fast they played the reels," Nan commented to her daughter as they folded petticoats and sorted through ribbons. "It reminded me of the dance lessons I took when I was a child in Williamsburg. I did so love to dance, much more than your Aunt Felicity did."

"Aunt Felicity and Uncle Ben dance beautifully together," Louisa said with a toss of her head.

"He wasn't the best dancer I ever saw, but he was the only one who could ever coax her into enjoying a dance. He took her to a ball at the Governor's mansion when she was not more than a child...ten or twelve, I think. I'll never forget it. She had a beautiful blue dress trimmed with lace, and he looked so handsome. I was wild with jealousy at her for getting such an opportunity."

"Ben went to the Governor's mansion?" Louisa looked up surprised. "Wasn't that an awkward thing to do at the time? That was right as the war was starting, was it not, and Ben was a patriot."

"Yes, but Felicity wanted to go. It was considered quite lucky to receive an invitation to the palace. Your grandfather could not take her, as my mother was recovering from a very serious illness at the time, and he could not leave her. Ben offered to escort Felicity because Felicity had worked so hard at her dancing lessons, and was so looking forward to wearing that new dress." Nan sighed. "It was so romantic. I watched them ride away, and I think I thought right then for the first time about what a lovely couple they might make."

"I never think of Uncle Ben and Aunt Felicity as being particularly romantic," Louisa admitted. "They're very loving toward each other, but so practical, and I have a hard time picturing Aunt Felicity decked out in lace. In my best memories of her, she's wearing a riding habit!"

They both laughed. Charles, passing though the hall, came in then, to find out what the merriment was about.

"We're trying to think of our best memories of Felicity," Nan said, wiping the mirth from her eyes.

Charles smiled. "I like to think of her as she was on the day that Matthew was born. He was such a perfect baby. Ben was a wreck waiting for that child to finally come into the world, and was over the moon when he did. The first thing Felicity wanted afterward was the biggest possible breakfast. She was always so happy and strong, but that day was the one that will stay longest in my mind."

Nan's face shadowed, as she remembered the day Louisa had been born, and the terrible moment she had found out she would not be having any more children. Charles had never held that against her though, and they were so proud of their only child. Privately Nan hoped that Edgar and Louisa would have better luck, and produce a lot of grandchildren for them to spoil.

Edgar had grown more apprehensive during the long ride to King's Creek, but he was much impressed by the Davidson's horse farm when they arrived, and found it quite easy to fit in. Louisa, Ben and Felicity gave Edgar a tour of the stables and tack room. As he perched with Felicity Davidson on the top rail of the corral, a tall, brawny servant named Sam led each of Ben Davidson's horses out of the barn, one by one, so that Edgar could admire them.

He and Ben and Bryce talked horses endlessly, and Felicity often joined in. She was, Edgar quickly realized, as knowledgeable about them as any man he had ever met, and Louisa's fiancé grew especially fond of Felicity Merriman very quickly. She was the perfect hostess, and was very sympathetic to young lovers. As soon as she greeted them at the door, with a white shawl draped carefully over her exquisite shoulders, and her red hair blazing, and a wide smile on her lips, he was smitten.

"How long have you been married, Madam?" he asked her, as Ben and Bryce conferred with Sam about one of the horses.

"Oh, I can hardly remember a time when I was not married," Felicity said solemnly, but her eyes were dancing as she looked into the corral at her husband.

Ben heard that, and looked back at his wife. "It's been nearly forever, or at least it's felt that way. This woman has been a tribulation at times, I must say," he said, just as solemnly, but his eyes were dancing, too.

"I took a chance on you, Mr. Davidson" Felicity answered, smiling, "but that's what love is. It's a chancy, chancy thing."

They all laughed merrily at Felicity's observation and Ben's teasing. Edgar admired the way the two of them could joke together, and hoped he and Louisa would be that comfortable with each other when they had been married, as Ben Davidson put it, "nearly forever."

The room they had given Edgar faced west. He could see the green pastures between the house and the river. It was a spectacular view. At dinner that first night, Felicity Davidson sat at the end of the table wearing a fine silk dress. It was periwinkle blue in color, and reminded Edgar of moonbeams on water. White lace edged the square cut bodice and there were dainty blue bows in the sleeves. She was also a spectacular view. If she had been ten years younger, Edgar thought, he would have been more smitten than he already was. It would be a pleasure having her for a kinswoman. Ben Davidson would be an asset as well. He was a strong, handsome, sensible man with a firm chin and clear eyes. He was definitely much older than his wife. Edgar could see that his future wife hasn't been exaggerating about that. Felicity Merriman must have been a precocious child to catch and hold the eye of a man like Ben Davidson for as long as she had, or at least a determined young woman.

When the hectic pace of the weekend got to be too much, Louisa took Edgar for a walk to the burial ground, which was a very peaceful place, and gave Edgar an even stronger sense of what family meant to his wife-to-be. He wondered what it would have been like if Felicity's brother had lived. Would everyone still be together? It was hard to imagine King's Creek without Ben Davidson in charge. He had such an obvious love for the land.

Edgar had been very impressed by Sam, the man in charge of managing the horses. Ben Davidson explained to him that Sam was the grandson of Saul, the man who had been in charge of the plantation when Felicity's grandfather had been running it. Such a long unbroken connection to the land was something that Edgar could appreciate. He vowed to himself, that once he was settled down, he would give his own country home more attention.

The barbecue was a great success, and the table was draped with linen and set with china and silver as fine as any Edgar had ever seen at any Richmond Ball. As a well-trained servant handed Edgar his plate and a glass of wine, he closed his eyes and just breathed in the scent of the good cooking mixed with the fresh, sweet air. It was delightful. It was heavenly.

Everyone who came to the barbecue had a lot of suggestions for the wedding, and all of the arrangements were quickly made over pulled pork and potato salad. The entire Merriman clan was looking forward to seeing another one of the girls wed, and Nan was proud and happy when she was asked to make her daughter's wedding dress.

"I know you will do a wonderful job, Mother," Louisa said, looking at Nan with love in her eyes.

"Of course she will. When she gets finished with that dress, you will look like a princess. No one can sew as well as Nan," Felicity said wryly, putting a hand to her head, which puzzled Edgar, but he shrugged it off.

They began to discuss news of the day, and Edgar was also impressed by how interested they were in the doings of the world. These were not simple farmers by any means. They sincerely mourned the death of General George Washington the previous December. Ben Davidson had actually seen the famous general in person during the war, and Edgar was very impressed.

Patrick Henry has also passed away the year before, and the entire Davidson clan had mourned him as well. They had forgiven him for his desertion, along with Thomas Jefferson, of Williamsburg, since he had proved so able a Governor. No one had ever doubted his patriotism, either, and his "Give me liberty or give me death!" speech was legendary.

The fifth president of the United States in Congress assembled under the Articles of Confederation, Thomas Mifflin, had just passed away in January, and the Continental Congressman from Rhode Island, Ezekiel Cornell, has passed away in April. It seemed as if all of the great heroes of the war were being lost.

A new mansion was being built in Washington for future presidents to reside in, and they all hoped that it would be competed soon, so that whoever was elected president that year would be able to move into it. Voting has started in April, but was not expected to be completed until the fall, and it would be early in 1801 before a decision would be announced. The majority of the Davidson family favored John Adams for the office, and they had a keen political debate about his qualifications, with the women having as strong an opinion in most cases as the men. That surprised and delighted Edgar. He'd known many young ladies who preferred to keep their opinions to themselves, thinking it unwomanly to engage in such talk, but politics fascinated him, and it was a relief to see his in-laws were of much the same mind. The U.S. Congress would be holding its first Washington session that November.

They laughed over the fact that in January the previous year, British Prime Minister William Pitt the Younger had introduced an income tax of two shillings to the pound to raise funds for Great Britain's war effort in the Napoleonic Wars.

"They never did, it seems, learn their lessons about taxation," Bryce Davidson remarked dryly.

"Napoleon calls himself First Consul," Ben Davidson replied, sipping a glass of wine, "but trust me, some day he will be emperor. He fancies himself master of Europe no doubt, but he will find Europe a difficult thing to master."

"They never learned their lesson about war, either," said Felicity, signaling for the dessert course.

"New York has passed a law aimed at abolishing slavery in the state," Charles Prentice remarked. Everyone looked pained at this.

"It is a difficult question," said Ben with a sigh, watching the servants begin to bring out the dessert, a perfectly baked assortment of pies. "I do not see my slaves simply as property; they are people as well, and I have no respect for any man who mistreats his slaves, but I do not know how we would be able to maintain our way of life without them. Things must change a great deal for us to be able to do that, but I do think at some point the question will have to be taken more seriously than it is now."

They began to reminisce, and Edgar was soon laughing at their many traditional family stories. Ben told a thrilling tale about how Felicity had borrowed a pair of his breeches to wear while sneaking out at night to train her first horse that had all of the younger women in the family both delighted and scandalized, for scandals can be very delicious in retrospect.

The younger members of the family recalled past celebrations, barbecues, birthday parties, balls, and previous summer days whiled away at the plantation. Felicity's Minette had wandered away from the table to sit on a brightly colored quilt and teach Polly's youngest, Julia, how to blow bubbles, and Felicity shook her head and smiled at her fiery haired young daughter, remembering how she had done that as a child. Some things never changed.

It was legend in the family how Ben and Felicity had stood on the porch of the Merriman house in Williamsburg, to greet the invading British soldiers. Their fond tales of the old town made Edgar wish he could have seen it when it was thriving, but he could not imagine the family being as happy anywhere as they were at the plantation. He couldn't wait to come back with his mother, and had already started planning a return visit in his mind. He knew that she would enjoy and appreciate the place as much as he did, and that she would be comforted by his future wife's close knit family. Christmas was a possibility. Christmas with the Davidson family would be jolly.

As they were preparing for bed that night, Felicity asked Ben what he thought of Edgar, as she slipped off her shoes and stockings.

"Does it matter what I think?" Ben replied. "If Louisa is happy, then it is not for me to question her choice, but I do think her namesake would have been as proud of her as her parents are, and proud of this young man."

"Poor Louisa," Felicity said with a sigh. "She would have so loved seeing her niece married. I miss her at family occasions such as this, although I know that Brandon and Annabelle are happy, I often think of her. She lives in my memory. She will always be there."

"Mine as well," Ben admitted. "She was the playmate of my childhood years, and grew into a steadfast friend."

"Did you ever regret not marrying her?"

Ben laughed, and drew his wife close. "I have no reason to regret anything. I could not have married Louisa because she never loved me and by the time the talk of marriage began, my heart was already firmly attached to another." He kissed his wife. "I owe you everything I hold most dear, it's true, but of everything I have, you are the thing I love the most."

It was twilight on the plantation, and the air had cooled and softened. The wind was rustling the trees outside the house as Felicity's arms wound around him, as eager as they had ever been. As he slid his hands over her to undress her, he remembered the first time he had done so. The impatient pull of desire had never left them, but the urgency was tempered with the tenderness that had grown between them through the years.

"Please," she murmured against his mouth. "Please?"

"Felicity," Ben murmured back, "it's always been hard to refuse you."

The End, at last.


End file.
